Just Like a Circus
by jelanieandbedwardlover
Summary: Jacob Jankowski returns to New Orleans after months of being a vet for the Circus. There he reunites with Mallory, a girl he left behind. But what happens with the circus comes back to town? Set in 2009.
1. Back to a place

**A/N: I don't own anything. This is an idea I came up with one day and here it is **

"_This is over," she whispered quietly. All I could hear was her voice breaking while she spoke so low. _

"_What," I answered back. We had been together for about three months now and I had never detected anything to believe she'd want this be over. All she could do was shake her head and sniffle. "Marlena, what are you trying to say? 'It's over?' Why is it over?"_

"_Jacob, please," she barely got out. "You know why this has to be over. I have a life, a husband. A husband, Jacob. I'm married. You had to know this couldn't last forever."_

"_But you said -"_

"_Forget everything I said. All of it. We need to stop this."_

"_No," I was determined to get a straight answer out of her. We loved each other. I told her. She told me. Wondering what would change her mind would drive me crazy so I needed to know now. "Why? I don't get it. We were happy. He doesn't know about us. It makes - "_

"_Perfect sense," she finished my sentence a bit differently. "Goodbye, Jacob." And with that she walked towards me. After kissing me on the cheek one last time, she turned to leave. Of course after sniffling one more time._

That was three months ago. Now I was traveling back to New Orleans, the first place I went to after I found out my parents had died. I had only been there for a couple of days but something about that place stuck in my mind. I was at Cornell University taking my final exams when the Dean came in. He told me there was a terrible accident and my parents were gone.

I had never lived a day without calling them, without getting advice from my mom. But somehow, someway I was going to. I had to.

After days of traveling, jumping on trains and buses, I reached New Orleans. I don't know exactly what I was looking for there. I had no family there but it seemed like a nice place to start over. I don't even know how it happened exactly but I ended up walking in this strip club. It wasn't even my style to go into a place like that.

That's where I met the most beautiful girl I ever met.

She had long brown hair and green eyes. She smiled and the room lit up. It was like an electric pull when I first saw her. She was a stripper there. I felt protective of her and wanted to cover her up or something but she didn't seem to mind the attention and the extra eyes on her.

It all happened fast. She told me what time she got off and we met up later. Nothing happened. We just talked but I know she wanted more. I think my purpose of finally returning here is to return to her. Even after being in a sort-of relationship all those months after I left didn't change it.

Marlena had nothing on her.

It's not a negative thing. Marlena was a thousand times beautiful, but somehow she didn't compare. And I thought I was never gonna see her ever again so a relationship and falling in love didn't seem like a bad idea.

So now I'm walking a familiar street and looking at familiar houses, waiting for the right one. Suddenly, I see the door I saw that one night and walk up the front steps. Taking a big, deep breath and knocked a couple of times on the door.

It slowly opened, and there she was.

"Jacob?"

"Hi, Mallory."

**A/N: Sooo? What do you think? Let me know. I know it seems kinda slow but I have BIG ideas for this and it will pick up a little more.**


	2. Memory Lane

Today was not what I had expected. First, my landlord decided to be nice and give me some lights back on. Then, I was called to the club early to get a few extra bucks. There were some extremely fucking generous customers. And now, the biggest surprise of all of it was standing on my doorstep.

"What the hell are you doing here," I demanded of Jacob. I saw him one day all those months ago before he hitched out of town. What could make him suddenly show up at my house?

He sighed, long and hard before answering, "I wanted to see you."

"Why the fuck didn't you do it all those months ago, huh? I mean, you left," I huffed out in anger, "Where'd you go anyways? Taiti? Hawaii? Somewhere hot with girls that take off their clothes outdoors instead of in?"

"It wasn't about that," he replied. I almost believed him.

"Then what was it?"

"I came here when something bad happened in my life," he said. "Meeting you and then you wanting me like that, I didn't think it should happen like that. Especially since I was grieving. It wouldn't have been right."

"Hmm," I sighed, "So I'm supposed to believe that you left to keep me pure or something? In case you forgot, Jacob Jankowski, I'm a stripper. A fucking stripper. I think I know a thing or two about what guys expect from me." I was angry. There was no way around it at this point. Who the hell did he think he was showing up like this? "You know what? I think you should go."

"No," he huffed, "You think you get rid of me easily? You tried to sleep with me. I think you're hiding behind something, Mallory, and I wanna know what."

"Can you go?"

He seemed like he was thinking for a minute. It took forever for him to finally answer. "Okay, fine," he said, "But I will be back." And he turned around and left the property. I shut the door and felt like I wanted to cry. Since when did I cry? Never. I didn't cry when my mother died, or at her funeral. I didn't even shed a tear when I left home. So why would a guy I knew for a few hours months ago have an impact on me?

_It was a normal day at the club. There were pervy guys and the usual ones who were there to cheat on their wives or some other bullshit like that. I was getting ready to go out on the stage when I spotted a cute looking guy sit at my usual table. He wasn't like the others at all. He looked a bit uncomfortable and out of place. _

_When I came out, he looked up but kind of shielded his eyes from seeing anything revealing. This was a strip club, for God's sakes. What was he doing here if it wasn't to come see naked girls?_

"_Hey, there," I smiled and called down to him. He looked up at my face and smiled back._

"_Hi," he shyly said. _

"_You look lost, sweetie," I answered him, smiling still. "What's a guy like you doing in a place like this? Get dumped or something?" _

"_No," shook his head, "Not that at all. I actually just wanted a beer and this place seemed like a good place to get one." He laughed then, a cute laugh, which was weird for me to notice._

"_So you're not here for the girls," I replied as I continued my dance, "You're breaking my heart, you know that?"_

_He laughed a short laugh and I smiled back again. "No, sorry about that. But I mean, you're a very pretty girl…"_

"_Mallory," I answered. _

"_Mallory." He looked like he was keeping it in memory. "I'm Jacob."_

"_Thank you, Jacob," I sweetly said. "You wanna go to a back room or something?"_

_He hesitated. So despite calling me pretty, he didn't want to go back there with me. Damn, I thought, I really wanted to go back there with him. He's fucking gorgeous, especially compared to most of the freaks I go back there with._

"_Okay."_

_Wow. I slid off the bar and took his hand up to the back of the club. I led him up the stars and he watched his surroundings get extremely private. Did he even really want to go back there, or did he say yes just for me?_

_We soon got to an empty room and I let the door shut behind me. "So what do you wanna do?"_

"_What are we supposed to do back here, anyways," Jacob asked me._

_I almost snorted. "You don't know?" He shook his head. "Well, anything. Almost everything. Oral, BJ's. What do you wanna do, Jacob?" I leaned forward on him as if I was going to kiss him. It was against the rules but I didn't care. It's not like there were cameras back here._

"_Could we just sit?"_

"_Sit?"_

"_Yeah," he tried to smile. "I don't know – Uh, I don't think I could…"_

"_What are you trying to say," I asked him, "Are you a virgin?" He blushed. "Oh my God," I started giggling. "I've never had a virgin come back here with me before."_

"_Well, I'm glad to be your first."_

"_Do you want me be yours?"_

_He swallowed. "Um."_

"_Okay, sorry," I said seriously, "Sorry about that. Too fast?"_

"_No, no," he tried to get the blush away, "Just I don't usually joke about it or having women offering."_

_I laughed._

"_What?"_

"_You had no offers?"_

"_Is that hard to believe or something?"_

"_Fuck yes," I answered, "You're fucking gorgeous! How would any woman in her right mind not want to have sex with you?"_

"_Could you keep it down?" The blush was back._

"_No one can hear us. So if there was anything else you wanna do that you'd want no one hear-"_

"_I think I should go, actually," he stood up to leave. _

"_Jacob, I'm sorry-"_

"_It's fine," he put some money down to pay for taking me in there and opened the door. _

"_Hey, if you wanna talk, meet up when I'm working, I get off at eleven." He nodded so I knew he understood me and then left._

_What the hell did I just get myself into?_

Walking into work that afternoon was horrible. After seeing Jacob come to my doorstep, I had my mind all jumbled up. Backstage, I dressed in a daze and didn't even realize it was my time to go dance.

"Girl, what is up with you today?"

I turned around to see Tara, who was looking at me like I was someone else. "Nothing," I replied, "The usual, you know."

"Okay," she nodded slowly. "Are you gonna tell me why you're in space right now or are we gonna drill after your dance? I know how much you want to after you've been half-naked for all those middle-aged men." She laughed a bit at the end because she knew my reaction.

"Okay, look," I pulled her into a corner. "There's this guy I met a few months ago. I thought it was gonna be something and you know how hard it is for me to think the word 'relationship'. Then he left town the next day and today, showed up, out of the blue, on my doorstep. I mean, what the fuck, right?"

Tara sighed. "Sweetie, I think if you really felt like this was something, or could be, you need to talk to him."

"Yeah," I challenged, "And what if he's left already? It wouldn't be the first time, you know."

"I think that's something you need to find out, then," she said as we were both told to get out on the floor. I took one last deep breath and went out there, clearing my mind of the one guy to stay on it.


	3. Making it right

I sat in my hotel room hours after I left Mallory's house, playing back everything. From Marlena to the night I left. I thought about my parents and what would they think of me now.

There were all these different scenarios running through my mind. Of what if Mallory agrees to see me? What if Marlena comes here and says she wants to be with me? What if her husband finds out about the affair and tries to kill me?

But for some reason it all came back to the girl who was here. The reason I came back. But she wanted nothing to do with me at the moment, so there was nothing I could do there. My mind kept going back to the night we met.

_She approached me in the darkness, where I was standing by a Toyota. It wasn't exactly my car but it was a rental. She looked even more beautiful, which I didn't think possible, but there was something about the fact she was now wearing jeans and a t-shirt that was so much better._

"_Wow," I whispered to her. _

_She giggled, "What?"_

"_You look…I don't even know the right word," I responded. And I didn't._

"_It's just jeans," she smiled, "What's better about that then my other outfit?"_

"_I don't know," I smiled back, "But there's something about seeing you like this. Before, don't be offended, you didn't seem as comfortable as you are dressed casual."_

"'_Don't be offended' Is that possible?"_

"_I'm sorry."_

_She looked at me questionably, "Why do you think you have to apologize?"_

_I shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe I felt like I did something wrong or maybe it just slipped out. Who knows, right?"_

"_I make you nervous."_

"_What?" _

"_I. Make. You. Nervous."_

"_No," I cleared my throat, "I know what you said. It's just – I don't know."_

_She walked over to me, with a huge, devilish smile on her face. "Yes, I do. You don't know what you're saying half the time, I think. Is it because you're a virgin?"_

"_Shush," I tried to quiet her, "Don't say it so loud, you know." She laughed the cutest laugh I ever heard. "I don't really want the whole town of New Orleans to know of my inexperience."_

"'_Kay," she stopped laughing and settled on a smile, "I won't laugh and I won't shout it. How about we get out of here?" _

"_Where would we go?"_

"_I know the perfect place." _

_And she led me to a car in the parking lot._

There was a light knocking on the door. At first, I thought it could be Mallory. But when I opened it, there stood the landlady. "Come in," I said to her. I was leaving anyways. I wasn't going to give up on Mallory talking to me. I may have made a lot of mistakes, one being leaving her in the first place. But I knew it was the right choice to try to make it right.

I grabbed my jacket as soon as the woman was done cleaning up and headed down to the club. I remembered where it was from the last time I was here but knowing whether or not I had a shot in hell was another case.

It was lit very dark as I scanned the room. My eyes found her walking onto a stage by the bar. There was maybe one guy by her so I walked over. Her face looked in my direction as she caught me walking towards her. It did not happy. The guy must've sensed something between us so he coyly moved over so he watching her and the girl nearest to her. As if to make room for me.

"Could I get a beer," I asked the bartender a few inches away from where Mallory was dancing. He nodded and went to get me one. I just stared at her as she was forced to keep dancing. There was no way she could just stop.

"What are you doing here," she half-whispered while smiling to keep appearances.

"Came to see you," I answered. "Do you think we could go to one of those rooms and talk?"

"That's not what they're for," she replied.

"Well," I said back, "We can do anything you want, as long as I get the chance to be alone with you."

She hesitated a minute before answering. "Fine," she shrugged, "but only because my boss likes when us girls bring someone back there."

She walked off the bar and led the once familiar way to the back rooms. "This feel like déjà vu to you?"

"No, because the last time you were here, it wasn't for your own ego."

"What?"

"This again," she remarked, "You need some new fucking ears, Jankowski." We reached the room and she shut the door behind me. "So?"

"So what?"

She sighed. "You walked to talk. You got me up here. So talk."

"I came back because I missed you."

"Oh?" She crossed her arms as if to prove a point. "Is that all?"

"Mallory - -"

"No," she responded, "You don't get to 'Mallory' me. You left! I mean, sure, we weren't serious and we only knew each other for a few hours, but still. What kind of guy gets offered sex from a frigging hot stripper and says no? Are you gay or something?"

"No," I thought of Marlena and my feelings towards the girl in front of me, "I am definitely not gay."

"Then what?"

"I was confused," I took a deep breath. "You were very straight-forward and I was just this awkward guy around a gorgeous girl. What would you have done in the situation?"

She snapped right back, "I would've fucked me."

"Now there's a picture," I laughed.

It was enough to break her. "Touche," she laughed. "I get off at ten tonight if you want to come back later."

"So, you're speaking to me now?"

"Yeah," she dragged out the word, "I guess I am."

I smiled at her and she smiled back. "I guess I'll see you at ten?" She nodded and I left her some extra money to keep up the pretense and opened the door.

"But if you leave tomorrow morning, I will kill you," she almost screamed. I laughed a little and she smiled again. Then I left.

"_So this is my house," she pointed to white house at the end. "It's not much but it's my home. I guess."_

"_It's nice," I lied._

"_No, it's not," she laughed, "It's shit."_

"_Yeah, it kinda is," I laughed back. We reached closer to the door and walked up the stairs in the front. She pulled the key out of the wall at the end of a long string. She really was a unique person, I thought. _

_The door opened and she flicked on the lights. It was much nicer when you were inside. "It's nice in here, though."_

"_Yeah," she shrugged, "I had this friend who came and stayed with me. He fixed the place up, way better than it was. He even bought me a bad because all I had was a pullout couch." She seemed to find it funny though because she laughed a bit at the end of her sentence. _

_Wait a minute. He?_

"_He?"_

_She turned around. "Oh, it wasn't like that at all. I mean, yeah, I offered but he was noble and had a wife."_

"_You make that sound like a bad thing," I replied._

"_It can be."_

_We stared at each other for a long instant until she finally looked to the ground. "I'm gonna change," she said to me as she walked into her bedroom. I started looking around, not that there was much to look at. There were no pictures to be found, or even statues on the furniture. _

_When I turned from the wall to start walking again, I caught a glimpse of her changing and quickly turned away. I may be a virgin but I wasn't blind. I knew if I looked now, I might not stop. And I didn't want her to think I was a freak or a pervert or anything._

"_You want something to drink," she called from the other room. A second later, she walked out in a short blue dress. Or was it a shirt? I couldn't even tell. What the hell was I getting myself into by going to her house?_

"_Yeah, sure," I swallowed and finally answered. This was going to be hard to be a gentlemen. She handed me the drunk and sat on the couch. "You always this comfortable with all your guests?" I felt a lump in my throat thinking of how many guests it could be. She looked at me cluelessly. "The outfit," I clarified._

"_Oh," she looked at herself, "Is it bothering you?"_

"_No," I lied, "No. Just it's little to be wearing around a guy you just met, huh?"_

"_Well, it's more clothing than I wear at the club for guys I never even met," she shrugged, "If that makes you feel better."_

_I blushed a little at that and I wasn't a blusher. _

"_I guess it does," I answered._

"_Well," she leaned over me, "If you want, I could put on my outfit from the club for you. You could get your own private dance." She whispered into my ear, "And maybe we can do something about that pesky virginity of yours." Her breath was hot on the side of my face and I suddenly felt very nervous. I had no idea what to do with a girl. Especially a girl like Mallory. _

"_I don't know," I managed to gulp out considering the tightening of somewhere south._

"_Aww," she pouted, "I was kinda looking forward to getting to know you, Jacob." She grabbed my hand and placed it on her chest. "Really getting to know you." And that's when she kissed me. There was chemistry exploding from every part of me, pulsating through me. I kissed her back with an intense want and need, despite not knowing if I was doing it right._

_I must have been. She started moaning as her tongue entered my mouth and she climbed onto my lap. I knew I should stop it but I couldn't find it in me to stop her. I started sqeezing, grabbing, touching every part of her I could reach. Her hand slowly moved down to unbutton my jeans and that's when I stopped it. _

"_What's wrong," she panted breathlessly. _

"_We can't do this," I replied. _

"_Why the fuck not?"_

"_Mallory," I calmed myself down, "We barely know each other. Do you really want to rush it?"_

"_Hell, yes," she went right back to kissing me and slipped her tongue back in. I had no power when she did that. It felt good and it even felt right and I placed my hands back on her. She grabbed my hand and pushed it up her thigh, making me want to right then and right there. _

_Then she shocked me by standing up off of me and holding out her hand. I took it, not sure if I should and she led me to her bedroom. As soon as we were in there, she started kissing me again as she pulled off my shirt. I put my hand back on her thigh as her night clothes started to ride up her back and she moaned even louder this time. I must have better of a kisser than I thought. _

_She went for my belt and the buttons again and the alarm clicked again. I knew once she got in there, I was doomed. I sat up, placing my hands on her and sitting her next to me._

"_What now?"_

"_I'm sorry," I sighed, "I don't think I'm ready for this. I mean, I want it. I want it bad. You have no idea." _

"_I think I have some idea," she said as she nodded her head towards the bulge that was so clearly on display. She giggled as I tried to sit differently. "I think it's cute." She reached her hand towards it and placed her hand, palm down. "I think it likes me," she giggled again._

"_Oh, it definitely likes you," I said back. "But this can't happen right now." _

"_Okay," she stood up. "Just remember what you could have had." She pulled off her dress as I tried to keep my eyes from wandering on her naked body. _

"_I need to go."_

"_Bye," she smiled back at me as I bumped into the wall, covering my eyes from her. But I knew I would never get the image out of my mind._

"_Bye," I called as I got to the door and there she stood in her bedroom doorway, still not an ounce of clothing on her. She was still smiling and it was the last image I'd see of her for seven months. _

_That night when I was going back to the hotel, I saw a sign reading "Vet needed". It was a Circus in town and I happened to be a Cornell Vet. I went back to my room and asked for a job the next morning. The train took off later that afternoon and I didn't see Mallory again. _


	4. Asking Around

**A/N: Okay so I started this and closed the document one night ago. Then today I went and saw Water For Elephants in theaters and was too amazed to be possible. I loved it and Rob, and Jacob so I had to come on and write another chapter.**

**I hope you like it.**

"Fuck!"

I screamed for about the millionth time since Jacob visited. My mind had been in a fricking frenzy since he walked through the club's front door.

"Hey," Tara walked in, "What is up with you? You've been a total spaz since this afternoon. What's going on?" She paused for a second before giving me one of her 'concerned looks'. "Is it that guy?"

"God," I whispered then spoke up, "How do you know me so well? Seriously. Yes, it is him." I took a deep breath before I continued my very un-me-like feelings for this guy I barely knew. "He came to the club earlier. And of course, he charmed the pants off of me."

Tara looked at me questionably. "Not literally," I kept going. "But…it was really nice to see him again, even if I was mad at him. Or that I'm supposed to be."

She sighed then sat down, "And why are you supposed to be?"

"Because he left!" I screamed. "Because he had me all amazed by him, and wanting to fuck him. Not even for the night only. I was thinking something real! He gave me feelings then he just up and fucking left! That's why!"

"Sweetie," she said to me, "You make it sound like feelings are a bad thing." I was about to interrupt but she held a hand up and I let her continue. "You like this Jacob guy. Admit it. To him, and most of all, to yourself. You are a 17 year old runaway who became a stripper. Maybe meeting some guy and falling in love is just what you need."

"But -"

"I'm not saying you have to marry the guy this instant," she smiled which made me smile. "Or even have kids or anything serious right now. But you will never be happy unless you give it a chance."

I sighed, "You mean give him a chance." She nodded.

She was right. I knew it. But I was not a relationship person. Who knew that better than Tara? She was my best friend. Well, the best I could have in this line of work. But she knew. And she also knew I wouldn't get feelings if it wasn't worth it.

"Okay," I sighed again, "Maybe I'll call him."

"Good girl," my newly-found therapist/friend laughed, "Now you go get yourself that man." I laughed as she went back out to the stage.

I had some time before I had to go back out there. It was my break time after all so I decided to call someone who once told me I could talk to her with any girl problems. The phone rang and on the third ring, she answered.

"Hello?"

"Hi, Lois," I said into the phone, "I need to talk to you."

"Allison," she exclaimed, "What is it? Is something wrong?"

"No, no," I comforted her, "Nothing is wrong. At least, not that I think."

She took a deep breath. I could hear it. "Do I need to get Doug?"

"Please, don't," I replied, "I guess, it's a girl thing." It was. Lois Riley had told me I could come to her with anything. Girl problems, anything. She was like a surrogate mother to me and feelings and boys seemed like something a girl'd need a mother for.

"Oh," she said back, "What is it then, sweetheart?"

"There's this guy," I started, "He came to the club a few months ago -"

"What did he do?"

"Nothing, really," I answered, "I like him. I really liked him. I mean, we almost fucked -"

"Allison -"

"Sorry," I apologized, "I forgot you don't like when I curse."

"It's okay."

"Well, after we almost did that, he left. Like really left and I didn't see him for months. Now he came back and the first thing he did was see me. And I really want to see him. Not just in a 'I wanna fuck you' way – Sorry again – but a relationship way."

She hesitated a minute before answering me then said, "Sounds like you need to think this one through. On the one hand, this is the first guy you've liked in that way, right? Other than sex, even?"

"Yes," I nodded even though she couldn't see me. "Most guys I've slept with was for the money or something, but not to mean something."

"Not even your first time?"

I thought back. "No," I shook my head this time, "Not even then. I was 14 and there was this hot guy I met at a bar. He didn't seem to care and I never told him I was a virgin. No guy in a bar wants to fuck a virgin."

"Okay," she sighed , "I think, that despite he hurt you, which is obvious, that you should give it a chance. If this is the first time you've really felt something for a guy and he's actually got you thinking about relationships and the future, then go ahead."

I understood everything she had said and knew there was a lot of truth to it.

How many people needed to be right today?

"That's kinda like what my friend, Tara, said," I smiled.

"She sounds like she has the right idea, too," she answered and I heard the smile in her voice.

'Thanks, Lois."

"Anytime, Allison."

And we hung up the phone. I had about 3 more hours 'til I got off work. Three more hours 'til I would see Jacob again. So I took a very deep breath and fixed my outfit and got ready for my next dance and even for the worst of customers. Because nothing was going to ruin my mood. I was going to go for it with Jacob.

xxxxxxxxx

Finally, I got off work. It was dark outside from what I saw but what else could I expect at this time of night? The back room was empty again and I had time to collect myself before going outside. Taking off my work outfit and putting my jeans on, as Jacob said, I felt comfortable.

But I wasn't gonna tell him that.

I made my way out the back door where there he was. He was leaning against the brick wall of the building when he heard the door open. He smiled and I almost forgot how gorgeous he looked. Seeing him sent this mother-fucking butterflies in my stomach.

And I never got those before I met Jacob Jankowski.

Never.

"Hi," I whispered to him as he turned to look at me better. "You made it."

"Of course I did," he smiled again. "You look beautiful."

"Thanks," I felt a blush trying to come but I didn't let it. "Where do you wanna go?"

"Your place?"

"My place?"

"Unless it's too soon," he back-pedaled, "We could go get some coffee or something."

"Coffee sounds good," I smiled as I walked beside him and we started walking to a nearest coffee shop.

"No car?" he decided to ask me.

"No, no car," I laughed, "I sometimes use this rental car my friend Doug got me, but not tonight. I didn't know if it'd be comfortable driving in a car with you."

"Ouch," he laughed. "And how's walking with me going?"

"Good, it's going good," I smiled, "I did a lot of thinking since I saw you earlier. Even talked to a few friends, find out what they thought about our whole situation."

"And how would you describe our situation?"

"Um, that you left me high and fucking dry."

We both laughed at that except I could hear some pain in his laugh.

"You know," he started, 'I'm really sorry I did that. I was in a messed up place when we first met and then meeting you and everything that happened, I guess I took the easy way out."

"And what was that?"

"I saw a sign for a job," he put his head down to look at the ground. Or his feet. Either way. "And it was a job I'm good at, I have a degree and all. So I took off. I didn't expect to feel guilty when I was already out of town and I didn't think you'd wanna talk to me."

"What's the job," I asked. I couldn't believe I didn't know what he was.

"I'm a veterinarian," he answered proudly, "Went to Cornell. My dad was one and it kind of inspired me to be one."

"Wow," I smiled in amazement. "So you work with animals."

"Yeah."

"And your dad? Where's he?"

"Um," he hesitated, "he passed away a few months ago."

"Oh, I'm so sorry," I sympathized. "I didn't know."

"That's okay," he shrugged, "I don't really talk about it. You're the first person I've said it out loud to, actually."

"I'm honored," I answered. I smiled at him and he smiled back. "Here we are," I pointed across the street to the café.

We walked to the end of the street and he grabbed my hand in an instant and we crossed. It felt strangely comforting to have him holding my hand, even if it was just so we don't get separated by the oncoming traffic.

When he let go, it felt too soon.

I was in deep.


	5. For the First Time

"Window seat or aisle?"

Mallory looked around and pointed her head in one direction, "Window."

I nodded as we went to sit at the least crowded area by the window. "So what should we talk about," she asked me.

"You think we have nothing to talk about," I stated, not as a question.

"Well," she started forming her words carefully, "I don't see you for months. We only knew each other one night. And, oh yeah, I barely know you. So what should we talk about?"

I sighed, "Anything. What have you been up to?"

"Stripping. You?"

She smiled a mischievous smile. "That's not what I mean."

"Well, what did you mean?"

"I meant…" I trailed off and started a new course, "You said there was this guy who helped you fix the place up. Do you see him anymore?"

"Oh, yeah," she chuckled, "Doug."

"That's it? No more to say about this Doug?"

"Okay," she leaned back in her chair, obviously growing uncomfortable. "He's this married guy who fixed up my house. Is that good?"

"Were you attracted to him?"

"I'm gonna order a coffee," she said as she stood up.

"Mallory - "

She walked up to the counter and spoke quietly to the woman there. I tried to make out the words but her face wasn't exactly facing my direction. Then she turned around and sat back down in the chair.

"I ordered you a coffee, too," she smiled, "Is that okay?"

"Yeah," I shrugged, "Listen, Mallory, I get if you don't want to tell me anything because he was married. Or maybe you're just a guarded person while I'm a stranger asking you personal questions. But how else am I supposed to get to know you better if I never ask?"

She sighed deeply, "Yes, I was. He was much older than me and a very sweet guy. He knew I was this wounded person and tried to help me. So, of course, my reflex is ask him to fuck me."

This was going to be harder to listen to then I thought. Hearing her talk so casually about screwing some guy made me remember the night we met. It also made me think about how many other guys did she offer sex to.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing," I said, snapping out of my thoughts, "It's just – well, did he do anything about it?"

"No," she shrugged, "he was very loyal to his wife. And you know, a gentlemen. Oh well. Fuck it. He actually became this great friend of mine and so has his wife."

"That's nice," he smiled.

"Yeah," she smiled back. The woman came with our coffee and we both thanked her. As soon as she was out of earshot again, we began our conversation again. "Her name's Lois. She's pretty awesome and helps me out when I need her."

"So you still talk, then?"

"Yeah," she blushed slightly. "I actually called her about you today. She told me to give you a chance and all that bullshit."

"Wow," I chuckled, "Sounds like I'd like this Lois."

"Maybe one day you can meet her," she stared into my eyes. Then she suddenly looked down as we both realized what those words meant: she would introduce me to important people in her life.

"Yeah, maybe," we started drinking our coffee's after that.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

We walked back to her place almost silently. All you could hear was the sound of our footsteps stepping forward. Her house came closer and it seemed very much like déjà vu seeing it at night time again.

"Here we are," she smiled a small smile. "So…"

"So…"

"Do you wanna come in?" I hesitated. "I won't just take off my clothes again." She leaned forward to me then whispering in my ear, "Not unless you want me to." She had this wicked smile on her face and I couldn't help but give a knowing smile back.

We walked into her house and she flicked on the lights. "So Doug did all this?"

"Yeah," she said walking into the kitchen. "He cleaned my bathroom up, my kitchen, bought me a bed and all this other shit. He even opened the fusebox outside and got my pervy landlord to keep my lights on a lot of the time."

"Why would have do that," I asked. That must be some fucked up landlord.

"He comes to the club a lot," she answered, "And he wants me to fuck him or give him a blow job or something. I don't know. But he refused to let me have electricity unless I did something with, to or for him."

What an asshole.

"Doug pretty much made him shit his whitey-tighties, I guess." She laughed as she sat down on the couch. It was feeling more and more like déjà vu now. "Come sit. I won't bite. Well, not unless you ask me to."

"Okay," I sat down beside her and she grabbed my hand. "What are you doing?"

"I like your hands."

"Thank you?"

"No," she laughed again, "I mean it. They're soft and not rough. I like the feel of them."

I inched myself more towards her and placed my hand that wasn't holding hers behind her head. I leaned in and kissed her. She responded instantly and began kissing me back. Her hands went to my hair and started pulling and messing it around.

I didn't care.

My hands started traveling everywhere on her – hair, legs, back, chest, everywhere. She moaned into my mouth and pulled away.

"What are we doing," she panted.

"I don't know," I shook my head and kissed her again. Her hands traveled to places too and she chuckled as she reached a certain spot.

"I think it likes me again," she giggled against my lips.

"You wanna meet him?" I asked her, jokingly yet hoping she'll take the bait. She pulled away again and stared into my eyes. I stood up and held out my hand, just like she did that last time. She took my hand and stood up herself. I grabbed her and carried her in my arms to the bedroom. Her, kissing my neck the whole time, giggled the whole way.

I placed her down on the bed and hovered over her. She grabbed my collar and brought my lips to hers again. My hands were quickly in her hair again and hers in mine.

She reached to the hem of my shirt and started to yank it off. _This was going to happen_, I thought to myself. _Not like last time._

Mallory pulled off my shirt and grabbed me down again by the shoulders. "You're a fucking amazing kisser," she said.

"So are you," I replied. We started kissing again and I reached for her jeans zipper this time. She knew where I was headed and unzipped them then peeled them off. I looked down at her, in her t-shirt and underwear, and knew this was who I wanted.

Not anyone else.

She went for my zipper this time and undid it slowly yet fast. I pulled at her hem this time and she just pulled her top off. We were both there in our underwear and I officially knew this was happening. We kissed deeply again and rolled over so she was on top.

Hands everywhere and clothes soon completely off, we were still kissing,. Not going there exactly there. She moaned again and again. I knew I was doing something right.

I also knew I was in love with that girl.


	6. What's your age again?

The sun shone in too bright. _Ugh_, I groaned. The sun should not be allowed to do this. I opened my eyes and saw the blinds were up. _Who the hell opened them?_ A French toast smell hit my nose in that second and I jolted upright.

There were few things I knew that second: I was naked in my bed. There was French toast somewhere. And it was early. Then it walked the cause of two of those things.

"Hey," Jacob walked in with a big smile on his face. He was carrying a tray I've never seen before with a glass of juice and food. Ah, the French toast.

"Hey," I smiled back, despite how early it was to be awake. He sat down in the bed beside me and placed the tray over my legs. "Thank you."

"Well, it's the least I can do," he replied. "So, what are you doing today?" I took the fork and knife, beginning to cut my food.

"I don't know," I said. "I don't usually have many people to socialize with, you know." I put the first piece of food in my mouth and it reminded me of last night: orgasmic. "How did you even know I liked French toast?"

"I didn't," he shrugged. "I guess I just picked one of my favorite breakfast foods and made it. _Do_ you like it?"

"Yes," I smiled, eating some more. "You are a fucking amazing cook, you know that?" He blushed a little as he tried to hide his face from me. "Why are you embarrassed? It's not like I just commented on how you were in bed." Jacob looked up at me, shocked. "Which was mind-blowing and fantastic and every" – kiss – "single" – kiss – "fucking amazing word in the universe."

He took the short kisses as an invitation and moved in closer. _God, he was fucking good._ He stopped suddenly and I moaned at the absence of his lips as he moved the tray over to the table. Before I could complain, he was kissing me again and hands were everywhere.

Jacob leaned me towards my headboard and I was on my back once again. We kept kissing and it felt like a repeat of last night's festivities were about to resume. Considering the fact I was already naked and he was wearing a t-shirt and boxers, it wouldn't take long either.

_As soon as we were both naked, I couldn't help myself from staring at him. He was fucking gorgeous. And amazing. What other words could I possibly use to describe this man on top of me? No other man or boy I'd met, had sex with, saw naked, or anything even, compared to Jacob. _

_The fact that he was a sexy guy who also had a lot of heart made it all the more better. I moaned with each movement he made. He moaned back, as if it were a response to mine. I felt all lame and girly, getting emotional over having sex. That was not something I did. _

_Well, the sex, yeah. Emotions, fuck no. _

He seemed to be becoming impatient. He started tugging at the blanket that was covering me, the blanket I still held tight over me. "Not yet," I whispered against his lips.

"Why not?"

"Because maybe it's too soon."

"Too soon?" He sat up. "We already slept together."

"But it's early," I said back, "I'm not really awake yet." I sat up and covered myself even more with the blanket, trying to tease him that I was suddenly shy. "Maybe later."

"Mallory," he sighed, "what's so wrong with now? You think screaming and moaning and orgasms won't wake you up?"

He had a point.

"Damn," I whispered. He smiled a triumphant smile. "I'm gonna go take a shower then." I leaped to my feet off the bed and wrapped the blanket around me. Jacob watched me go with a sad look as I entered the bathroom. "Well, aren't you coming?"

He jumped off the bed and kissed me eagerly and with want. "Eager little fucker," I giggled against his lips.

"Fuck yeah," he replied as I dropped my blanket and that was the last of conversation for the morning.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The shower part was easy. It was the getting dressed part I had some trouble with. Taking a shower with Jacob made me want to stay in there and get all prune-y. And looking like a prune is not good for someone who takes off her clothes for a living.

Everytime I put an article of clothing on, Jacob would try to take it off me. A bra – he'd pull the strap down. Jeans – he unzipped them. If he wasn't standing there naked as he did it to me, then maybe I could do it back.

But I was very, _very_ thankful he refused to get dressed.

"I gotta get dressed," I groaned to him. "You can't keep distracting me."

"That's not fair," he pouted, "How am I distracting you?"

I looked at him with a pointed glare, "Let's see – your hands and your lips." Then I made a extremely obvious check-out look. "And you're also standing there fucking naked, like you're trying to tempt me to get back into bed with you."

"What would be so bad about that," he gave an innocent look. "You don't want to go back to bed?" He pouted again.

Damn, that was sexy.

"I might get spoiled," his face lit up then I continued, "then I won't go back to work."

"I'll help you get another job," he shrugged. "Besides, I'm not really a fan of my girl stripping for these perverted guys in a club and going to back rooms with them."

"I only go to back rooms for special customers like you," I smiled, "so that's about how many special guys at this point?" I laughed.

"That's not funny," he said back.

"I know," I wrapped my arms around him, trying not to wander any lower than his back. "But, I need to make a living. What kind of job could I possibly get that would pay even a quarter of the money I make stripping? I'm not exactly some college graduate." I paused. "Or even high school."

He looked at me. "You didn't finish high school?"

"Even if I was in school," I started, "I wouldn't be done."

He backed up and I could see what was coming. "How old are you?"

"What my ID says or the real age?" He gave me a serious look. "17."

"17," he whispered. "So this" – he pointed between me and him – "is illegial."

"Yes, in some ways," I replied, " But I don't have any family. Well, real family. I'm technically emancipated."

"Where's your mom," he asked me as he began to get dressed. There goes the deal breaker.

"Dead."

"I'm sorry," he looked up.

"Thanks," I whispered back.

"Your dad?"

"Dunno," I shrugged. "I guess he spilt or something. But he barely was there for me when my mom died."

"Look," he was dressed in his jeans only and made me bit my tongue about how I screwed this up. "I really hope I didn't just screw myself over and get myself set up for an arrest warrant."

"Jacob," I walked over to him slowly, "Look, this isn't wrong. There's…feelings. And, I mean, so what? I'm 17. I'll be 18 not too long anyways." He seemed to ease up a little bit. "How are _you_, exactly?"

"23," he whispered.

"Wow," I smiled, "that's fucking sexy."

He laughed a bit, which made me laugh. "We can make this work, you know?"

He sighed, "I gotta think. I mean, I like you, really. I do. But I don't want to be doing anything we shouldn't be doing." He looked around. "Do you think your dad would ever have any contact with you?"

"Probably not," I shrugged again, "he never has." My mind started to process through what must be going through his mind. "Are you saying you're leaving? Before we even get to start anything?"

"I think it's already started," he whispered. I nodded, as if in understanding that it was only a matter of time before he leaves me. Already. "Look, just give me some time to think, okay?"

"Yeah," I nodded again. "Okay. Um, where are you staying?"

He had his shirt on now and was getting ready to walk out. "At a hotel about 2 blocks down. I didn't wanna be far if you wanted to see me."

"Room?"

"7."

"Okay," I sighed, "So if you want to talk - "

"I'll be there," he said. "I should go."

"Are you coming by the club later?"

"I'll think about it," he turned around as he neared the door. I walked over by him and tried to smile.

"Bye, Jacob," I forced out as I kissed him lightly. "Just in case you don't want to continue this. We'll have that last kiss."

"Bye," he smiled a small smile back. Jacob turned the knob and opened the door. When he was one foot out, he turned back. "Mallory? That won't be our last kiss." There was the biggest smile in the world and I was hoping he was right. I smiled back.

xxxxxxxxxxx

I didn't tell Tara or Lois what happened. I definitely didn't tell Doug. How would that conversation go – 'Oh, there's this guy back in town I met for a few hours months ago and we had amazing, fucking hot sex then he found out I'm underage and left.'

Yeah, that'd go over well.

When I was dancing for those perverted freaks out there, I kept my thoughts business-like. Not thinking about Jacob or anything else but getting my money. And giving them a show that'll make them tip well. Of course.

I pretty much pictured each guy as Jacob at some point. It was hard to understand the power he had over me but he had it. Jacob Jankowski had somehow captured every part of my brain and body into thinking about him. I was handcuffed and not in the way I was used to.

Then my favorite song came on and I heard the door creak open. I saw a familiar head of hair and a gorgeous face. Jacob looked around to see if I was out there and when he saw me, he smiled as walked over. I breathed an internal sigh of relief and continued dancing.

The song continued on.

_Walk you to the counter  
>what you got to offer<br>pick you out a soda  
>look at you forever<br>walk you to the water  
>eyes like a casino<br>you ain't born typical  
>find a piece of silver<br>pretty as a diagram  
>go down to the Rio<br>put it in my left hand  
>put it in a fruit machine<br>everyone's a winner  
>laughing like a seagull<em>

_you are a fever, you are a fever  
>you ain't born typical<br>you are a fever, you are a fever  
>you ain't born typical<em>

_living in a suitcase  
>meet a clown and fall in love<br>been dying to have you over  
>clown around and brake up<br>take you to a jukebox  
>that's the situation<br>pick you out a number  
>that's our arrangement<em>

_dancing on the legs of a new born pony  
>left right left right, keep it up son<br>go ahead and have her, go ahead and leave her  
>you only ever had her when you were a fever<em>

_i am a fever, i am a fever  
>i ain't born typical<br>i am a fever, i am a fever  
>i ain't born typical<br>we are a fever, we are a fever  
>we ain't born typical<br>we are a fever, we are a fever  
>we ain't born typical<em>


	7. Old friends

**A/N: This chapter is starting mid-scene of when Jacob finds out Mallory's age, to get his reaction and what happens next. I know I might be moving slow and the chapters aren't that long, but thank you to anyone sticking with me or reviewing. You are amazing!**

**Oh and I'm changing some parts of Water For Elephants – like for those who know who dies in it, they don't in here. I needed Jacob to have some people around him who was loyal and a friend.**

"I know," Mallory said. "What kind of job could I possibly get that would pay even a quarter of the money I make stripping? I'm not exactly some college gradute." There was a slight pause in her words. "Or even high school."

That surprised me. I knew she had a – well, hard childhood sounded like an understatement. But I never knew that about her. "You didn't finish high school?"

"Even if I was in school, I wouldn't be done," she replied to me. That made me stop and think even more than her last statement. How old exactly was she? I never even thought to ask her that before.

"How old _are_ you?"

She sighed and answered, "What my ID says or the real age?" I gave the most serious look I could form. "I7," she replied after a few murderous seconds. I felt like the suspense had been killing me and also like now that I knew, I didn't want to.

I could get arrested.

"17," I whispered back. It was all I could do in the moment. I gathered my thoughts up and tried to speak. "So this -" I made a point to show I was talking about the two of us by pointing to her and me "—is illegial."

"Yes," she calmly responded, "In some ways. But I don't have any family." Pause. "Well, real family. I'm technically emancipated." I only heard the one word that meant she wasn't.

"Where's your mom?"

I went to get my clothes and started to get dressed. I couldn't be standing around naked, talking about the girl I just had sex with, the most amazing kind ever, was underage. I needed to be wearing something.

"Dead."

That stopped me this time. I paused from getting my pants on and looked at Mallory. "I'm sorry."

"Thanks," she whispered. You could tell she doesn't like talking about that too much.

"Your dad?" I needed to push this to find out if any family would come after me for corrupting their daughter. They would probablty blame the stripping on me.

She shrugged. "Dunno. I guess he spilt or something. But he barely was there for me when my mom died." Fuck. Now I felt like shit for asking about an asshole and bringing up her dead mom.

"Look," I began when my jeans were completely on. She started biting her lip, which caused me to want to bite her lip. I knew that wasn't exactly what I should be thinking of during a conversation like this. I should be thinking of what all this could mean. "I really hope I didn't just screw myself over and get myself set up for an arrest warrant."

After all, Mallory did say there was this guy and his wife that treated her like family and she was really close to.

She started walking over to me. "Jacob," she started. "Look, this isn't wrong. There's feelings. And, I mean, so what? I'll be 18 not too long anyways." That's true, but how long exactly? "How old are you, exactly," she questioned me.

"23," I answered truthfully.

"Wow," her face lit up as if that were a turn-on. "That's fucking sexy."

I guess it is.

That caused me to laugh a little bit and she laughed with me. "We can make this work, you know," she said.

I sighed loudly. "I gotta think," I answered back. "I mean, I like you, really. I do. But I don't want to be doing anything we shouldn't be doing." I looked around the room, glancing for anything to distract me from what I knew I had to do soon. Anything to delay it.

Then I got another thought. "Do you think your dad would ever have any contact with you?"

"Probably not," she just shrugged. "He never has." She looked thoughtful for a second and then suddenly, hurt crossed her face. "Are you saying you're leaving? Before we even get to start anything?"

"I think it's already started," I said, keeping my voice low. I was already in love with her, after all. There wasn't much I could do to get out of this unscathed. She nodded, as if she was thinking the same thing I was. I got my shirt on now and knew it was inevitable now. "Look," I tried to keep it less painful, "just give me some time to think, okay?"

"Yeah," she nodded slowly again. "Okay. Um, where are you staying?"

"At a hotel about 2 blocks down," I replied. "I didn't wanna be far if you wanted to see me." I didn't think it was dangerous to tell her where I was staying, not that she would come. Not if she thought I was upset, anyway.

"Room," she asked me back.

"7," I was hesitant but told her anyway.

"Okay," she sighed at me, making my heart want to break. "So, if you want to talk-"

"I'll be there," I answered. I knew it was time. "I should go."

"Are you coming by the club later," she asked. I honestly hadn't even thought about it.

"I'll think about it," I said with a slight smile forming on my face. I couldn't make any promises. Not now. I walked towards the door and Mallory followed me. She was trying to smile back, which made me want to hug and kiss her.

That wasn't exactly the right solution.

"Bye Jacob," she managed to speak. She leaned in and kissed me soft. "Just in case you don't want to continue this. We'll have that last kiss." Her face was heartbroken and looked like she was about to cry. Mallory didn't seem like the crying type so I knew this way bigger than it seemed.

"Bye," I forced out a smile back. I got my hand on the knob and turned it. The door opened and I turned to face her again.

"Mallory?" She looked at me. "That wasn't our last kiss."

I smiled at her and she smiled this gigantic smile that showed how happy those few words made her. Just then I walked out the door, with the image of her happier than the last time I left. And knowing it wasn't going to end up like last time.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

It took me a while to think on my way back to the hotel. The girl I'd just fallen so helplessly in love with, that I'd just _slept with_, was only 17 years old. I know it doesn't seem like a panic attack to most people but for me, it was.

Just a few months ago, I was having an affair with a married woman. And now I'm having sex with an underage girl. Sure, she was a stripper so maybe it was true her father had no involvement with her life. But it didn't mean he couldn't come looking for her or that those people who love her like a daughter wouldn't come after me.

If I learned anything from my relationship with Marlena, it's how bad secrets are. Her husband was, is awful. He would beat her and seconds later, be begging for her forgiveness as if he didn't wash a fork. It wasn't right how he was treating her. And she knew it.

That's why she came to me.

When I first met Mallory, I was this shy, lost boy who had no family and nowhere to go. Seeing her that first night, I felt like I saw an angel. Or whatever the equivalent was for an angel in a strip club. I had to chuckle at that a bit.

When I ran off to that vet job in the Circus, I didn't know what I was in for. I was thinking of Mallory a lot. I barely knew her but there she was on my mind all the time. That is, until I met Marlena. She was everything Mallory wasn't. She couldn't stand up to her husband, her family abandoned her for marrying so young.

That may have been what attracted me to her in the first place.

I loved Marlena, I did. Still do. But it's a different level of love then I feel for Mallory, which I know now.

Reaching the hotel and getting up to my room, I felt free. Free to scream and throw things and wonder if I was stupid for getting involved or stupid to let her go. I had to hold a pillow over my face the few times I did scream because I didn't want to alarm anyone who was around.

Getting it all out seemed like the answer. I knew I needed to talk to someone. That part was obvious. But I didn't know who I could talk to. Walter was still with the circus. Camel went home to his son. I sure as hell couldn't call Marlena. It felt like that was the right thing to do but what if her husband did know about us?

I couldn't exactly call to say "Hey" then.

I tried calling some of the guys I was at Cornell with but there was no answers. Just phones ringing, probably wondering who the hell was calling them. I had no idea what time it was where they were.

Instead, following my gut, I dialed Marlena's number. If she answered, I'd ask if he knew. If he answered, I would hang up and maybe try again later. The ringing only lasted twice and I heard her pick up.

"Hello?"

"Marlena," I breathed.

"Jacob? Is that you?"

"Yeah, it is me," I replied. "Does -"

"No," she cut me off, "he doesn't know." I breathed an internal sigh of relief, especially that I could even be making this phone call right now.

"I need to talk to you," I said. How to start was a bit confusing, though.

"What happened?"

"Nothing bad," I assured her. "There's this girl."

I heard her chuckle, "You've moved on?"

"You're married," I outsmarted her. "Remember?"

"Yeah," she whispered, "I am." I kicked myself for saying that without thinking. "So what about this girl?"

"I'm in love with her," I said honestly. "I haven't known her for that long but I already love her, Marlena."

"Does she love you?"

"I don't know."

"Well," she chuckled again, "You always were the romantic type so I knew you'd fall in love with some girl soon."

"Yeah," I said smiling, "there's a problem though."

"What's that?"

"She's 17." There was a pause on the other side as I heard her sigh. "Marlena?"

"I'm still here," she said. "Just taking it in. Are her parents around?"

"No," I sighed. "Her mom's passed away and her dad left. There is these people who treat her like a daughter but that's it. They'd have no legal claim involved."

"Then go for it," she said.

"What," she shocked me. "'Go for it?'"

"You love her," she started, "her parents aren't in the picture. I don't see the problem."

I thought about it for a second and she was right. "Thank you."

"Anytime," she smiled. And we said our goodbyes and hung up.

xxxxxxxxxxxx

I walked into the club when I knew her shift was. She wasn't at her usual spot so I had to look around. None of those girls could compare to her, at all.

She looked up at me when I saw her. I smiled because I knew this whole crazy thing was over. I could tell she was relieved and happy as I walked over. The chorus of the song was perfect for us.

_you are a fever, you are a fever  
>you ain't born typical<br>you are a fever, you are a fever  
>you ain't born typical<em>

She kept dancing and even though there was other guys near, I knew she was dancing just for me. I also knew it'd all be okay.


	8. I Belong to you

Watching her dance was like a dream to me. Me and Mallory had our first real fight and I was to forgive her. I knew It was a dumb thing to get upset over, especially when it was technically my fault. I never once asked her how old she was and it's not she lied to me.

Every once in while, she would look over at me and wink or smile. There were even some seductive looks and then she would mimic touching herself as if it were a sign. I could only smile or sometimes, chuckle a little because I knew she was doing it for me. The other guys there may have been satisified with seeing her like that but it satisfied me a million times more knowing she was doing it solely for me.

_When these pillars get pulled down  
>It will be you who wears the crown<br>And I'll owe everything to you_

_Woooo, woooo_

_How much pain has cracked your soul?  
>How much love would make you whole?<br>You're my guiding lightning strike_

She was glancing over, already sensing I forgiven her. I could see it in every move she made, every time she leaned on the pole. I felt as if everyone was invading on a private moment when I was watching her. Mallory was dancing for me the second she saw me walk in, whatever way this was going to go.

I knew that.

There were so many guys around her tonight. It may have to do with her routine right now but it was impossible to get her in a back room with me that way. There were guys staring at every inch of her skin, trying to see as much of her as they could without her being naked.

I wanted so badly to get her in that back room and kiss her and do as much as I can with her as I can before time would be up. There was no way I could wait until closing time to kiss her.

Especially while watching her pretty much touch herself up there for me.

_I can't find the words to say  
>They're overdue<br>I've traveled half the world to say  
>I belong to you<em>

_Woooo, woooo_

_Then she attacks me like a Leo  
>When my heart is split like Rio<br>But I assure you my debts are real_

I'm about to make my move to ask her when this one guy gets in my face. "Hey, listen," he says in the most threatening voice he can form. "I hear you come here every night and you get this girl to be alone with you."

"Yeah," I swallowed, "what's it to you?"

"It's time another guy goes back there with her," he replied. "You know what I mean?" I felt the blood pooling in on me and wanted to punch him. She was my girl. Sure, she was a stripper but when she wasn't on that stage, she was my eyes only. My hands only.

"Yeah," I said in a loud, defensive voice, "I know what you mean."

I gave the guy a little shove and he looked as if he wanted to back off.

_I can't find the words to say  
>When I'm confused<br>I traveled half the world to say  
>You are my muse...<em>

_Oooo, woooo_

"You did not just do that," he smirked. This was going to be a fight, I thought.

"I think I did."

Then his fist rose and punched me square in the jaw. I stumbled backwards a bit and hit him right back. I caught a glimpse of Mallory as the guy stumbled forward and ran towards me. She was scared, from what I could tell. The guy crashed into me and landed me on the ground. I was fisting the guy on his back.

I was never one for fighting but right now, fighting for Mallory's honor and anything along with it, seemed right. I was able to get on my feet when the manager came and broke us up off of each other.

"Hey, hey!" he screamed. "Both of you! Out of here! Now!" Security came and took us both by the arm and started to walk us out. I risked a glance back at Mallory and there was a look of terror on her face. I didn't want anyone to know she actually knew me because of what it could mean for her job.

Once outside, the security guard went back inside and the man approached me. "Man, what the fuck?" he screamed.

"Me?" I screamed back. "You started this!"

"No," he yelled a bit quieter, "You couldn't be told other men deserve to go into a champagne room with the stripper. What the fuck was that?" Then his expression changed to one of mocking. "What, you sweet on her or something? You will never have a shot. She's a stripper, man. A fucking hot one. Like she's gonna go for you."

"What's so wrong with me, huh?" I questioned the stranger. There was more to me than there was to him and that was without much of an ego. "You think you're some mother fucking God of a man? She'd go for you?"

"I'm hell of a better pick than you," he spat back. "Strippers are money hungry whores who take off their clothes for a living. What, you think they look for the big happy ending at the end of the rainbow or something? That happily ever after?"

He paused a moment before continuing. "The hot ones are the worst. They'll take you for all that got and you'll smile while she does it."

"You got this all wrong, asshole," I answered back. "Okay? That girl in there - I know her. She is not who you think she is."

"Really?" he asked me. "Huh. In think she's exactly who I think she is."

"Really? What's her name?"

"Allison."

"Wrong," I said back. Why would he think her name was Allison?

"No," he chucked, "I think I'm right." Then he held out his hand, as if a friendly gesture. "Hi, I work with Doug Riley. You ever hear of him?"

I gulped. I remembered that name. It was like the age fight all over again playing in my head. That Doug Riley, he would find out an older guy was sleeping with Mallory and press charges.

"I take it you have," he smiled. "I'm George."

"Jacob."

"Well, well, Jacob," he grinned, "I know her, all right? Her name is Allison and she's been whoring herself around before you came."

"She's not like that," I swallowed.

"Sometimes," George whispered, "she's a prostitute." He chuckled one more time and started backing towards the cars in the parking lot. "Trust me, if you want to know her any better, cut your losses. It's not good for you."

I didn't know what to say. I never heard of her name being Allison or even the prostitution. I couldn't ask her. The next time we were going to see each other was supposed to be a reunion type of thing.

Not exactly the best time to bring up sleeping with guys for money.

So instead, I went back to my hotel room and sat there in silence. I couldn't help but think of all the guys Mallory's possibly slept with or if that guy was even right. I didn't want to think of the girl I loved like that but his words were replaying in my brain over and over again.

_"Her name is Allison and she's been whoring herself around before you came." _

"_Sometimes, she's a prostitute."_

It turned 2am before I even realized it. I must have fell asleep. There was a light knock on the door and it woke me up.I stumbled out of bed and walked to the door. When I opened it a little bit, there was Mallory.

She was smiling. "Hi."

"Hey."

"So," she started, "are you going to let me in or am I gonna freeze out here all night?"

I chuckled with relief as I answered, "Yeah, of course."

"Did you think I was that guy who got you kicked out?"

"No, no," I shook my head. "Little bit."

"You're so cute," she chuckled back as she walked in my hotel room. Now I started imagining how many hotel rooms she'd been in. I needed to stop those thoughts.

Mallory went and sat on the bed. Seeing her there made me want to do things to her but I needed to get one thing out first. "I guess you're waiting for me to say I don't care about the age thing, right?"

"Well," she answered, "I kinda figured that was the case. I mean, you walked into the club, came over to my table and then when some guy is eyeing me like a steak on a buffet table, you get into a fight." She smiled a bit. "Let's say, I came to that conclusion."

"Yeah, I guess it does seem dumb for me to think you didn't know," I smiled back and sat in the chair across from the bed.

"You don't want to sit next to me?" she pouted, obviously trying to make do those things I've wanted to do since I saw her dancing earlier. I moved next to her and she placed her hand on my thigh. "Much better."

"Mallory -"

"Ssh," she put a finger to my lips. "I wanted to do something for you since you were kicked out in the middle of my dance."

Mallory leapt to her feet and headed for the bathroom, a bag in her hand, but putting a cd in my player first. I wondered what she was doing and all I could think of was what I was hoping for. Shortly after my mind started to wander, she came out of the barhroom, wearing a trench coat.

"What are you doing?" I chuckled.

"You didn't see the rest of my dance, silly," she smiled. "So…" she walked to cd player and a familiar song started playing. "I'm bringing my dance to you." Mallory threw off her coat and there she was, in her usual club outfit in my hotel room.

_When these pillars get pulled down  
>It will be you who wears the crown<br>And I'll owe everything to you_

_Woooo, woooo  
><em>

Mallory started swaying in place, moving her hips and arms to match the song. I was getting little glimpses from the most seductive spots.

_How much pain has cracked your soul?  
>How much love would make you whole?<br>You're my guiding lightning strike_

_I can't find the words to say  
>They're overdue<br>I've traveled half the world to say  
>I belong to you<em>

I was tempted to reach out and grab her. Then as if she heard my thoughts, Mallory climbed onto my lap and started giving me a lap dance.

"I sincerely hope you didn't do this at the club," I joked.

She laughed lightly and whispered, "Only the most special of customers get this kind of treatment."

Her breath was hot on my ear and I managed to speak again. "Am I one of those special customers?"

"No," she whispered, her hands reaching to the buttons of my shirt, "You're my little sex toy that I like to play with." She giggled as more buttons came undone and she pulled my shirt off.

"I don't think you can take my shirt off when you do this," I gasped.

Giggling again, she answered, "Oh I think I can." Her little hands went to my belt buckle and started opening it. "See, I'm barely clothed. I figure it's only fair you're half naked too." Off goes the belt and onto the zipper.

My hands started climbing up her back and she moans a little at the contact. "Two can play this game, you know?"

"Yeah, but wouldn't you love to see me play it alone?"

Oh crap. This girl was going to be the death of me.

My hands worked their way to the tiny straps of her tiny outfit as I played with them, as if I were going to pull them down. Her hands were trying to pull my jeans off, while still sitting on my lap. I grabbed her up by her ass, and laid her on the bed. She giggled as I moved her.

My pants were off in a fast movement. I wanted this girl bad. Quickly, I was on top of her and hovering. There was an evil smile that crossed her face as she bit her bottom lip. That did it - I needed to bite it for her. I kissed her deeply and almost roughly. If it was too rough, she didn't mind.

Mallory just moaned even more.

My fingers worked their way up her side, tickling her through and through. She laughed and giggled as they made their way higher.

My hand soon found its spot on her chest. She sighed in content as I began to slide her straps down for real this time. Her eyes closed and my other hand inched higher on her thighs, getting to that other certain spot. She moaned and writhed underneath me and we weren't even naked yet.

Her top was off and things had gotten off course from a continued dance. "You are…so beautiful," I whispered to her, looking up and down at her. And loving every inch.

She smiled, "You're not so bad yourself there." Her hands were inching towards taking my boxers off and even dipping inside. "I think my little friend's back." Another giggle.

"He's not gonna be so little when he sees you again," I smiled. She nodded in agreement and kissed me fiercely and passionately again. This was turning into the perfect night.

_I belong  
>I belong to you alone<em>

_Woooo, woooo  
>Woooo<em>

_I can't find the words to say  
>They're overdue<br>I've traveled half the world to say  
>I belong to you<em>

_Woooo, woooo_


	9. Introductions

**A/N: Okay, brace yourself because this is my longest chapter I've ever wrote. I really hope you like it!**

A few weeks had passed since that stupid fucking argument about age. I had a feeling there was more that was bugging Jacob, but I wasn't one to start confrontations where they might not need to be one. Besides, he was too busy sleeping right now to really mention, or _do_ anything.

There was a lot of sex going on. That part was fucking amazing and I'm definitely glad he's past whatever he needed to get past.

Oh right. His virginity.

Fuck it. As long as we were past the whole "we're taking it slow" or worse, the "I want it to be special" bullshit, we were good. But we still barely knew each other. We've been going out a few weeks, fucking for the few weeks, and I barely knew where Jacob even came from.

I was surprised I took the time to learn his last name.

Anyways, things were good and I was thinking about "getting to know him." I am not that kind of girl. I'm not even a relationship kind of girl. Whatever Jacob has done to me, it better be for the better because I could get scarred for this. Relationships are not something I've done before he came along.

Sex – now that I've done. The thought I had sex before Jacob and I'm 17, him 23, makes me giggle a little bit. You would think an incredibly sexy, gorgeous man like him would have girls lining up the block or something. As long as they're not still around the block, I'm happy though.

Jacob was mine now.

He begins to stir a little bit and distracts me from my possessive thoughts. Now they're floating to "What breakfast will he make me today?" or "Is he up for some fooling around?" and shit. Jacob's head starts to turn to the side and I see his eyes are still closed. Either he is playing a game or really still sleeping.

Fuck, he looks so sexy when he sleeps.

I consider waking up or even touching him in places he's probably dreaming about me touching. But what if he's not awake?

Then I'd be creepy girlfriend who cops a feel while her boyfriend is sleeping.

_Whoa._ Girlfriend.

I'd never said that word before, at least not to myself. But this time, he really does stir and his body turns on his back, eyes opening. "Hey," he murmers.

"Hey," I smile because I can't resist smiling when I see him, despite we had a sleepover.

"You've been up?" he asks me, starting to sit up. I do the same and put my hand on his rock-hard abs, my mind wandering to those naughty places again.

"Yep," I smile wider. "Waiting for you to get up is like waiting for Christmas, you know?"

"What?" he chuckles.

"Christmas," I clarified, "You know. When you're a little kid and you want Santa come and bring you all those gifts. It feels like forever waiting for that day." He looks at me like I just spoke in a different language or something. "Come on," I urge. "That saying – you're like a kid on Christmas morning?"

He looks at me for a second and replies, "Isn't it like a kid in a candy store?"

"You're missing the point."

"Come on," he smiled, taking my hands in his, "You have to know how crazy you sound for you right now. No 'fucking', 'shit', 'cock', 'pussy' – none of that. You're talking about _Santa_, Mallory."

"I don't believe in Santa, you know," I half-yelled. "I don't!" He started laughing a little. I punched him lightly on the arm. "You know, it's not good to laugh at the girl who you're having sex with." He stopped and looked at me, daring me to stop having sex with him.

"Fine," I grumbled, "You win. _But_ only because I like having sex with you."

Jacob leaned in and whispered in my ear, "I guess it's a really good thing I'm good in bed then." His breathe made my body feel all these tingles and I wanted to jump on top of him right that second. But I couldn't. just to try to prove I can resist him.

"I want some breakfast," I jumped out of my bed, completely naked, grabbing the first shirt I found. He let out a sigh that was obviously disappointed. I put the shirt on and went to make some eggs.

"You know you're pretty cruel," he said as he walked, now dressed in a pair of boxers. I gave a look like 'who, me?' and he nodded. "You."

"No, I'm not," I shrugged, "I was just really hungry." I made a show of breaking the eggshells and pouring milk into a bowl. "Want some scrambled eggs?"

He shook his head and walked closer to me. "You're really gonna eat right now?" I nodded. He came right behind me, his arms sliding around my waist, his mouth right beside my ear again. "Because I wanted to do some things to do that you probably won't want to do on a full stomach."

I gulped and he knew he had me. "I'm really hungry," I whispered, barely finding my voice. His hands moved up and each grabbed a boob on their own. I moaned, not wanting to move into the bedroom but definitely not wanting him to stop squeezing. "Stop," I tried to whisper, mostly just to prove it to myself.

"Why?" he asked, his nose skimming my ear, giving me chills again.

"Let me eat first," I spoke low, "Maybe after."

"You're really saying no?"

I squeezed my eyes shut, still mixing the eggs and milk. I didn't want to say no. I just didn't want to start the day without eating now that I was making the food.

"I'm saying…" I started, not knowing what to say next, "Just let me eat. I swear, I'll let you do whatever you want to me after."

"Wow," he whispered, not believing his ears, "Mallory saying no?" He chuckled a bit, squeezing my boobs one more time before letting go. I groaned at the loss of his hands. "I'll jump in the shower then, wait for you."

Jacob started backing out of the kitchen. "Wait," I tried to find my voice again. "Just eat with me. Please."

He pretended to be thinking and then answered, "Really?"

"Yeah," I tried to smile, "Come on, we should eat breakfast together." I stopped mixing the bowl at this point, waiting for him to tell me to add another egg to the batch.

"Okay," he shrugged and sat in a seat so he could still watch me. I went into the fridge and grabbed a couple of more eggs and when I turned back, I caught him watching me.

"What?" I laughed.

"Did you know that I could see your ass just now when you bent into the fridge?"

I felt a blush rise up to my cheek. "You're embarrassed?" he chuckled. "You do remember last night and all the many other times I've seen you naked, right?"

I covered my face with my hand, trying to hide the blush. "I just didn't think of that at the time when I bent." I started laughing and he laughed with me. I decided to go back to the mixing bowl and began stirring again. Jacob chuckled again. "What now?"

"Your boobs totally move when you stir," he grinned, naughty. I let out a little laugh. "It's really sexy, you know."

"You're not even hungry, are you?"

"Maybe not for eggs.."

I knew where his mind was heading. "Good things come to those who wait."

"What about fantastic, mind-blowing things that I could do every day if you wanted me?"

Whoa. "That'd be okay," I shrugged, "But first, you gotta eat." Jacob gave a pout and I couldn't help but laugh at the sight. "I'm gonna put some more clothes on," I said, walking towards the bedroom and picking up a bra and panties. I heard Jacob groan when he saw me pick them up.

After putting them on, I walked back into the kitchen. He was watching me, with a sad look on his face. "Why?" he mock-cried.

"Because," I poured the mix into the frying pan, "You, mister, were too distracted." Another pout.

Then he stood up. "Fine," he just said. My eyes followed him into the bedroom as he picked up a t-shirt and put it on. Now I groaned, which caused him to give me an evil grin. "Now we're even."

"No," I shook my head, watching the pan. "I still don't have pants or shorts on. So…"

"I think I'm comfortable," he replied. "I'm hungry."

"You're insane," I laughed again as I finished the food and we ate.

Of course after breakfast, Jacob did jump in that shower. With me not far behind.

xxxxxxxx

I was drying my hair with a towel when I felt Jacob come up behind me. His head was parked on my shoulder and it felt nice. "What time are you going to work today?"

"7:00," I responded. "And I'm working til 2 am again."

He made a noise that could only be recognized as disappointment. "You think I'm allowed to come back in there?"

"Maybe," I shrugged. "I don't know. You've been a good boy and waiting for me so maybe enough time has passed."

It was easy to forget about the incident a few weeks ago. Jacob getting kicked out of the club for punching a guy over me felt kind of romantic. Like something a girl in a fairytale would expect.

He moved his face from my shoulder, turning me around to face him. His hands started playing with the loops on my jeans. "Do you know who that guy was? The one that I fought?"

"No, why?"

"I just…" he trailed off. This was going to annoy me. Why would he ask me if I knew the guy?

"What's wrong, Jacob?"

"He said some things to me…after we got kicked out," he took a deep breath. "Things about you."

"Like what?"

"I don't wanna say."

"Jacob," my voice rose, "What the _fuck_ did he say about me?"

He looked torn, like he wanted to tell me but didn't want to say the words. "That you're a prostitute, guys pay you for sex."

I sighed. "That's the past."

"It's true?" his eyes grew wide. So I guess he didn't exactly believe the guy. "What, is your name really Allison, too?"

My head snapped towards his. "Who was he?"

"It is, isn't it?" he questioned me. "Your name's not Mallory?"

"It is," I corrected him. "My parents named me Allison and we both knew how well that worked, so I changed it. Especially going into a career like mine."

"Anything else I don't know?"

"I'm from Florida," I replied in a small voice.

"That's nice," he forced out a smile. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because I'm not that girl anymore," I sighed, "I'm Mallory. I work in a strip club, I live in this shitty-ass house. My boyfriend is Jacob." I took a pause. He looked at me like he was about to jump for joy. "Are you my boyfriend?"

"Yes," he exclaimed, lifting me off of the ground and spinning me. It wasn't long before his lips found mine and we were in a deep kiss. "Definitely yes," he smiled against my lips.

"Fuck yeah," I smiled back as we continued kissing, therefore ending any dramatic conversation of the moment.

xxxxxxxxx

We were running out of food in the house so I needed to go check the store. Turning the aisle in the frozen section, I stopped. "Lois?"

She turned around and smiled a huge smile when she saw me. "Allison!" she ran towards me, leaving her cart in place and hugged me. I hugged her back, not realizing how much I missed her. "How are you, sweetheart?"

"I'm good," I smiled as she pulled back to get a good look at me. "What brings you here?"

"Doug has a meeting in town," she answered me. "Plus we wanted to come see you."

"Doug's here?" I asked. This day was getting better and better. Lois nodded, happy to see me happy about their appearance in town.

"He's at the hotel, not far from your house," she smiled. Jacob's hotel?

"Wait," I shut my eyes for a second then re-opened them. "Blue Eagle Hotel?" Another nod. "That's where my boyfriend's staying."

Lois gave me one of those surprised, knowing looks. "Boyfriend?" I blushed a little bit and nodded. "Little Allison has a boyfriend?" I nodded again this time. "Are we going to meet him?"

"Yes," I said, almost surprised, "If you want to."

"Oh, we definitely want to," she replied.

"Doug too?"

"Of course!" she chuckled. "When are you free?" Uh, I had work tonight. Maybe I could get out of it.

"I'm supposed to be at the club later," I answered, "But I can try to get off work." Her face lit up and there was another smile. "Let me get back to you."

She nodded, going into her purse and taking out a piece of paper. "This is the hotel room's phone number," she scribbled on the paper some more before handing it to me. "Room 10."

"Thanks, Lois," I smiled at her this time.

"Anytime, Allison."

We walked away from each other and I was suddenly excited about going to club, but fearing not being able to get off of work.

xxxxxxxxx

My boss let me off easy. I went to the hotel in a cheer as I waited to tell Jacob about our dinner guests. He needed to be okay with it before he came and there was suddenly people he didn't know here.

I knocked on his door a few times before it opened. "Hey," he smiled. "What's up?"

"Remember the Riley's that I told you about?"

"Yeah," he said, hesitantly. "What's going on? You look too excited about something."

"They're here!" I exclaimed. "And…they want to have dinner with us tonight."

"I thought you had to work," he replied.

"I got off," I shrugged. "Do you not want to? I can tell them and we can do something, the two of us."

"No, no," he shook his head. "What time?"

"7:30," I stole from the top of my head. "Oh! I can't wait for them to meet you! They are gonna love you!" I kissed him on the mouth quick and ran out the door.

xxxxxxxxxx

Time could not have gone slower. I was only ordering sandwiches from that restaurant me and Lois went to before, but still I wanted it to the perfect dinner. It was 7:15 pm. Jacob, Doug or Lois had not come yet and it was beginning to worry me.

Nothing worried me.

There was a light knock on the door and I raced to open it. There stood Jacob, in a very sexy looking suit and smiling. It kinda made me wish it was earlier now. "You didn't need to dress up," I smiled as I leaned in for a kiss.

He responded with as much enthusiasm as he could for a short kiss, "I know. I wanted to make a good first impression."

"You mean the fact that you're practically living here while paying for a hotel room isn't the right way to do this?" I joked.

"Very funny," he mock-laughed.

"You wanna go pick up the food with me?"

"Sure," he said, picking up my jacket for me as we headed out the door.

We got back around 7:29pm. This food had taken a bit longer than expected. When we arrived back, Lois and Doug were outside, waiting for me.

"Doug!" I screamed, running towards him. He enveloped me in a hug the second I reached him.

"Mallory," he smiled. "How you doin'?"

"Good, I'm good," I nodded. I looked behind me to see Jacob walking with the food. I felt bad about running so fast. "This is my boyfriend, Jacob Jankowski," I smiled, proud to be saying that aloud. Risking another glance at Jacob, he was smiling too so I know it made him happy to hear me say it.

When Jacob reached us, I took the food from his arms. Doug held his hand out and Jacob shook it. "Nice to meet you, Jacob. Doug Riley."

"Same here," Jacob replied. "I've heard a lot about you, Mr. Riley."

"Call me Doug," he smiled. "I wish I could say I heard a lot about you, but…"

"That's okay," Jacob shrugged. "I bet there's not much of me to tell. Mallory thinks the world of you and your wife, though."

"That's nice to hear," Lois smiled. It was the first time Jacob heard her speak so he looked towards her. "Hi, I'm Lois Riley."

"Hi," he replied, shaking her hand as well. "Nice to meet you, too."

"And especially to you," she said. "I'm the one who's heard the lot about you and trust me, Allison thinks the world of you, too."

Jacob blushed a little bit but was good at hiding it.

"So," I started, "We should eat."

With that, we all walked inside.


	10. Saying it out loud

**Here we go with Chapter 10. I feel like I've been waiting for my updates forever, I have all the ideas floating in my head the second I post the latest chapter. I try not to put the updates too close together and then when I sit here, about to write, I feel like I **_need_** to do this for anyone who is still sticking around. So, THANK YOU, to those who read, review or even recommend. I don't know who does what really but I'm glad you're sticking around for an idea I just came up with one night. **

Meeting Doug and Lois was not what I had been expecting. They had been pleasant and Lois made every attempt to "get to know me." I understood that because she was like a mother to Mallory. It wasn't really something I wanted to get in the way of.

I watched the way Mallory interacted with the Riley's. She was a different person. It was like watching a kid talk to their parents – it was obvious they cared for her a lot. I noticed these expressions from Doug in the corner of my eye sometimes. He wanted to know if I was good enough. I could tell it from his eyes.

"So where did you grow up, Jacob?" Lois asked me, snapping me out my thoughts.

"Uh -" I started, feeling like I was about to be caught up in a lie. My thoughts made me lose my train of thought.

"Lois," Mallory looked at her, "Let's leave the interrogation for another time, please? I don't want you scaring him off the first time you meet him." Like that was possible.

Doug chuckled. "I think if he's gotten to know you, he's gonna stick around. Isn't that right, Jacob?" He was looking at me, that protective father look on his face again.

"Yes, sir," I nodded. There was something frightening about the way he asked me that.

"You know," Doug leaned over the table, "You don't have to call me 'Sir'." I just nodded again. He then burst out laughing, not too hard but enough to break the tension. Mallory smiled a comforting smile and leaned over to squeeze my hand. Lois noticed and smiled at our connection.

"So, Jacob," Lois tried to ask again, "Where are your parents?" Mallory gave her a look that said 'don't ask him that'. Then she looked over at me apologetically.

"I'm so sorry," she whispered. I just gave her hand another squeeze to let her know it was okay to be asked things like that.

"They've passed," I replied. Lois gave me a sad, feeling-sorry-for face. "It's okay. I'm fine. It was a little while ago and very unexpected." I felt my head nodding and bobbing as I finished my sentence.

"Is it nosy of me to ask how?"

"No," I sighed. "They were in a car accident. I was in the middle of taking a final in school when the administrators pulled me out of class to tell me what happened." I took a deep breath for what felt like forever. "I had to identify their bodies."

I vaguely felt my head look down and cover my face from Mallory and her guests. I never told her that part before and I didn't want to break down or think of it when we were having dinner. Especially with people she cares so greatly about.

"I'm so sorry, sweetie," Lois whispered this time. "I had no idea. When did this happen?"

"A little less than a year ago," I answered. Mallory looked at me, not knowing that part either.

"Is that why you first came here?" she asked me. It wasn't anger on her face, just a sadness and curiosity.

"Yeah," I sighed. "I never finished my exam and took off. When I met you, I was in a very bad place. But you didn't know what happened so I felt myself around you. Not like I had to pretend to be okay or be feeling something about what was going on. Everyone in school found out fast. My friends thought I was gonna break, you know?" I chuckled a bit at the end, think back to how terrified my friends were for me.

"That's why you seem closed off when we meet," Mallory replied. "You just lost your parents and there I was, trying to – Oh God!" She hid her face in her hands then abruptly moved the chair out and got up.

"What happened when you met?" Doug spoke again.

"Well, let's just say me and Mallory met at the club."

I got up and followed after her. "I'm so stupid! You know that?" she was practically yelling. "There you were, without any parents and there I was, ready to fuck you!" She made a mock attempt of pulling on her hair and tried not to scream. "God! Why was I so fucking stupid?"

"Mallory," I tried to calm her down. Her arms were moving everywhere so my hands gripped them and placed them on her sides. "Mallory, listen to me. You are not stupid. You didn't know any of that, okay? I didn't tell you. You can't get mad at yourself for something I didn't tell you."

"Yeah, but," she shrugged, "I could sense there was something up with you. But instead, I looked at you as this gorgeous guy I really wanted to jump. Instead I should have been asking you what was the matter." Mallory took a deep breath and sighed. "I'm a slut. Aren't I?"

"No," I frantically shook my head. "You're not a slut."

"Then why was I thinking about sex when there was obviously something going on with you?"

I didn't know whether or not Lois and Doug had been hearing our conversation. And honestly, I didn't care. I needed her to know she wasn't stupid or a slut.

"I'm a stupid slut," she whispered, as tears started to come down her cheek. I had never seen Mallory cry before.

"No," I half-screamed, taking Mallory to sit on the bed while still holding her arms. "Listen. You are not a slut, or stupid and you're sure as hell not a stupid slut. I was thinking about it just as much as you were that night, okay? So I guess that makes me a bit of a slut too."

She smiled a bit at the end, then pouted. "But you were a virgin."

"Yeah, but I am human."

I smiled at her this time and she gave me a more-real smile back. There was quiet knocking on the door. It was Lois.

"Are you okay, sweetie?" she was looking at Mallory. She just nodded and wiped a tear from her eyes. Then sniffled. It was the cutest fricking thing I'd ever seen her do.

"Yeah," she was still sniffling, "Yeah, I'm fine." Lois nodded and Mallory stood up. She led my girl back to the table, and Doug had a 'thank-you' in his eyes. I guess he'd seen something like that before.

When dinner was over, Lois and Mallory went to talk outside, Mallory probably to smoke. Doug walked over to me, his face friendly but determined. "Hello, Jacob."

"Hello," I nodded at him.

"You know," he started, "Mallory means a lot to me and my wife. She's like a daughter to us so you could understand why I'm coming to you, right?"

"Yeah, definitely," I replied. "She thinks of you two as parents, you know."

"I did know that," he nodded this time. "We both want what's best for her. I mean, I would love for her to get out of her job, believe me. She even tried once. Ran away from me and Lois, too. Then she came back here, back to this house and went right back to work. Like nothing happened."

"What did happen?"

"I don't know," he shrugged. "She never talks about it. I asked her about it once and she changed the subject. I figure, I let her adjust and see what happens – if she'll ever feel comfortable enough to tell me."

"It doesn't bother you?" I asked. "Knowing she had this time which she can't even talk about with you or your wife? Do you ever get really curious and want to know?"

"Of course I do," Doug's voice rose as he answered. "But I'm not going to push her into telling me something she's not willing to tell me. The way I see it, one day, she'll need someone for her. And I don't want to abandon her just because I didn't know something."

That got me thinking about my time away. "Hey, um. Do you ever think that leaving something out is a good thing? Like there are things you don't want to tell a person and it's for the better that they don't know?"

"That depends," he turned to face me better. "What exactly are you keeping from her?"

I took a deep breath. He looked at me like I should fess up or he'd kick my ass. "The night me and Mallory met, I took off. And I met a girl."

It was his time to take a breath. "Was it serious?"

"Kinda."

"How serious?"

"Well, let's say she was married and I got in the middle of that," I sighed. He was the first person I was telling this to and I had no idea why.

"Oh," his eyebrows rose higher as he gave me a questionable look. "Is she still in the picture." I shook my head fast, wanting him to know Marlena was very out of the picture. "Did you love her?" I nodded. I felt too sick to speak now that I hear myself talking about it. "Do you love Mallory."

I looked up at him and nodded. "Yes."

"Okay, then," he said, simple as that. "If this woman, this married woman was to walk through your door right now, what would your reaction be? How would you feel?"

"Um…"

"I only ask because if your reaction is not the one I want to hear," he pointed a finger in my direction. "If Mallory gets hurt, then you're going to regret living." Shit. I was scared of Doug Riley.

"I'd tell her I'm with someone," I answered honestly. "And I'm not just saying that because of that threat. But because the second I saw Mallory when I came back, the reason I chose here to come back here was here. But I knew what me and that other woman had was nothing compared to what I felt for Mallory."

Another deep breath. "And…that it wasn't worth maybe ruining her marriage over. Though in my defense, she's married to an asshole."

"Does that make it better?"

"No."

"What if he finds out?" Doug asked me. Before I could answer, there was another question. "What if, because of what you did, it not being worth it, he did something to her? He beat her, raped her? Or worse, he killed her? What about then? Would you still be thinking none of it's worth it if you had the shot to save her?"

Fuck. Where did all that come from? I was scared shitless to answer him. I was about to say I didn't know what to say when Mallory and Lois walked back in. "Hey," Mallory smiled as she came beside me. "What are you two talking about in here?" It was obvious she had no idea what we were just discussing.

"Man stuff," Doug smiled. "Nothing you girls would care much about."

"That's not true," Lois smiled. "We could care, you know?"

"Okay, you do care then," Doug chuckled. "I think it's time we get going. What do you say, sweetheart?"

"I think you're right," she turned to Mallory and enveloped her into a hug. "Bye, baby. It was so good seeing you."

"I know," Mallory smiled, "It was." They held each other for a bit longer then broke apart. Mallory walked towards Doug and hugged him. It was hard for me to not feel jealous, even though I knew about the history there, because she had been attracted to him and he knew things about her I probably didn't.

"Jacob," Lois said as she walked to me. She hugged me and it shocked me a little but I accepted it. "It was so nice to meet you."

"It was nice to meet you, too," I replied. It really was.

Both of the hugs ended and the Riley's walked out the door after one last wave. Mallory walked over to me again and put her arms around me. "So…was that terrible?"

"No, not at all," I shook my head.

"Come on," she smiled, "That wasn't? Not even my little temper tantrum I had earlier?"

"No," I said again. "To be honest, I almost forgot about that." She looked at me like she didn't believe me. "You know, I loved seeing you with them. The way you were, it made me smile to see you so relaxed with them."

She pulled away and went over to the bed. "Am I relaxed with you, in your opinion?"

"Yes," I assured her, "I think you are. But this was different. And I liked, no _loved_ seeing you that way. You glowed."

She picked up a pillow and threw it at me. "_Glowed_?" She burst out laughing. "Sometimes, you really know how to make me laugh with the simplest things, Jankowski."

"Well, thank you very much, Allison Carter," I laughed back. She made a fake disgusted face, showing me she hates that name but then softened.

"I only allow that out of your mouth," she said. I could tell she was serious though. She walked over to her dressers and started pulling out clothes.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm gonna get changed," she shrugged. Then she unzipped her dress and my mind went elsewhere. It felt like spilt seconds passed as I made my way over to her and my mouth was on hers. She responded instantly and starting unbuttoning my shirt.

Xxxxxxxxxxx

The next morning came by fast. Maybe because we were up all night. Maybe because every time with her was considered "fun" and wasn't time supposed to fly when you're having fun? Mallory was in the shower and as much as I didn't want to, I stayed in bed, too tired from the previous night to do anything more than have a real shower.

But thinking about her naked and wet in the next room definitely made me feel hard.

She came out of the bathroom minutes later, wearing a t-shirt and boy shorts. "Hey," I said to her as she passed me.

"Hey," her face lit up. "You missed a great shower. I had to touch myself just to pretend you were there." Now I got harder thinking about that. "But, my hands are nowhere near as good as yours are." Mallory lifted one of my hands and placed it on her breast, and making me squeeze really did me in.

Then she moaned.

"I wanted to ask you about something," I said, trying to change the subject and readjust myself. She looked at me and dropped my hand. "Last night, Doug told me you tried to leave town. Why did you come back then? I mean, you could've started over."

Mallory stiffened. "I don't know. I guess I'm not cut out for the real world."

"Mallory," I gave my best look to let her tell me.

"I tried, okay?" she explained. "I went out to Chicago and applied for a real job. I got into the interview and the guy asked me what my previous jobs were and I wouldn't answer. He said he couldn't hire me if I didn't answer. So I told him I was a 17 year old stripper. He was pretty fucking quick to tell me the interview was over, but in a really polite way."

"He's an asshole, but it doesn't mean everyone's like that," I tried to assure. What a dick that guy was.

"It wasn't just him," she whispered. "I went to about 15 job interviews and they all asked the same things. And none of them liked the fact that I was an 'exotic dancer', you know?" She used air quotes at the end. "So I came back. I might as well be making good money if all I'm ever gonna be is a fucking whore."

"You're not a -"

"You don't have to say that," she shook her head. "I know what I am. I've accepted it."

"You're not," I grabbed her face in my hands and forced her to look at me. "You're a beautiful person, inside and out. You're amazing, thoughtful, sweet and you scare the hell out of me because of the way I feel about you so fast."

Mallory gave a smile. This was it. "And…I love you." She looked up at me, her green eyes glistening, on the verge of crying. I could tell she never heard that from somewhere who meant it before. I was ready for her to back away when she finally answered.

"I love you, too."

Then we kissed and began our next chapter in our relationship: being in love.

**Soooo? What do you think? **

**And I gave Mallory the last name 'Carter' because I don't think she had one in the movie but everyone needs a last name, right? Haha. **


	11. Missing You

**A/N: I am very excited as I write this because I found out Water for Elephants has a dvd release date this week! And not only that, I already have it pre-ordered. **** That dvd is gonna sit right next to my Welcome to the Riley's dvd. Honest. I can't wait to be obsessed with that now. **

It's a little frustrating to see your boyfriend search for a job in this town. He knows exactly what he's good at, what he went to college for, yet no one's hiring a fucking vet in this damn town. How is that possible? Jacob is probably a thousand times better than the ones I've seen buildings for.

But still, day and night, Jacob searches for a job he's too good for. I really don't get it. He could go anywhere but for some fucked up reason, he wants to be with me so he goes for shit-ass jobs that don't even pay good.

I make better money than him.

Weeks had passed since he met the Riley's. Jacob never said a word about his opinions on that night but I know he felt awkward. Being around Doug and sleeping with me is probably not a good combination. He's seen them again, of course but never like that night again, the weirded-out dinner we had.

But the weirdest part of all is I've seen Jacob and Doug whispering a few times. What the fuck is that about? He's my boyfriend and he's whispering to a guy who's like a father to me? If there was something he's keeping from me, I'd feel like I need to know.

Sure, I kept secrets from him. No fucking doubt about that one. But he's talking to _Doug_ about it. _Doug_. He is a part of my life, they both are. So what's with the secret keeping? Especially if it has something to do with me.

I'd have to ask him about it someway.

There was a light knocking on the door and I knew it was my time to go on the stage. At least my thoughts would travel in a different direction when I'm dancing.

"Mallory!" my boss yelled. "You got a minute til you go on! You ready?"

"Yeah," I tried to say as loudly as possible. I heard the footsteps retreat and he walked away. I breathed a loud sigh, smoothed out my tiny outfit and opened the door.

xxxxxxxxxxxx

Ugh. Why was the phone ringing? I rolled over in my bed and tried to reach the phone. "What?" I exclaimed to my wake-up call.

"Allison?"

"Lois."

It made me sigh in relief that it wasn't some creep calling me at 3 am but after dancing until 2 am, I did not want phone calls. "What's up?"

"Allison," she sighed. "I needed to call you about Jacob."

Panic shot through me fast and I almost felt like I couldn't breathe. "What happened?"

"He called me," she answered. "Don't worry. He's fine." I couldn't help the loud, happy sigh I took at the moment. I knew she heard it and I didn't care. "He came to our hotel door, said he was leaving that room."

"What?" I half-screamed. "Is he gone? Where is he?"

"He's not gone." I could sense her shaking her head through the phone. "He wanted to go find a job somewhere and said he got this call back, for in Baton Rouge, I think. It's a commute and all, but he had to go immediately."

"When will he be back?" I swallowed, scared he was gonna just take off again.

"I don't know," Lois replied. "I just knew I had to tell you and I didn't think it would matter when exactly the time was. You needed to know."

"Thank you," I sighed. She said you're welcome and we hung up. I started franctically dialing Jacob's cell phone number. It took 2 rings.

"Hello?"

"Jankowshi, you are a shit world of trouble, you know that?"

"Mallory," he said, simple and like nothing happened. "Did Lois tell you?"

"Fuck yes, she told me!" I screamed, sitting myself up in my bed. "But the real question is – why didn't you tell me?"

He sighed. "I didn't know how to," he finally said, the sadness seeping through his voice. "They called me and I jumped in my car. I needed to come check this job out and I didn't want to wake you." Pause. "So I told Lois to call you and tell you. I guess she woke you up anyways, right?"

"I hate you," I whispered.

"No, you don't," he chuckled. "What was it you said to me? Oh yeah. 'I love you.' You remember that, Carter?"

"No," I justified, "Nope. I don't love you. I said that to make you feel less stupid for saying it." I felt a smile creep up on my face as we went into our joking stage.

"Aww," he sounded hurt, "that breaks my heart, you know?"

"Sorry," I replied. "It had to come out sooner or later, you know?" I sighed, knowing the joke was over. "I miss you already."

"I know," it was his turn to sigh. "And I'm the one who knows we've been apart for hours." I laughed a bit at that. "I wanted to call you. I didn't want to hear you say 'don't go' or something like that. I knew I would come straight back if I heard you. To be honest, I'm fighting it right now."

"No," I said, "You need to stay about the job. You can't come back and risk it all because your I miss my boyfriend, you know?"

"But I miss my girlfriend."

"Well," I started, "How long are you gonna be gone?"

Jacob paused for a moment. "About a week, unless it takes longer. They're checking my background, past references and jobs and then I'm waiting for the big boss to come and that'll be in a few days."

"Let me come to you," I suggested.

"No, I can't do that," he turned me down. "I can't make you miss that many days of work."

"I'm a stripper," I said, "I think I can make money fast when I come back. All I gotta do is take off my clothes and dance on a pole for those perverted old and even young, sometimes ugly guys." I was chuckling a bit at the last part and I could tell he wasn't.

"And that's supposed to make me feel better?" he asked. "You being naked and dancing in front of those sick mother fuckers?"

"Yes," I giggled. "Tell me to come if you hate it so much."

I was testing him. I knew it. He knew it. But I wanted to know what he'd say.

"Mallory," his serious yet incredibly sexy serious voice breathed. "Please don't do this."

"Do what?" I asked innocently.

"Tease me," he answered. "Act like if I don't ask you to come, some other guy is gonna take you away from me."

"Who knows?" I tested again. "Someone might. You walked in that club unexpected and now look at me. You got me saying shit like 'I love you'. I love you! You know how much that is not me, Jacob?"

"I do," he confirmed. "But I think you hate the perverted guys that come in there just as much as I hate them watching you."

"Wow," I breathed, "I must hate them bundles and shitloads, huh?" I giggled a bit again, not being able to resist trying to make him laugh.

"Look," his voice was serious again. "I don't want to take you away, especially when your life is in New Orleans. Doug and Lois are in New Orleans. I can't just ask you to take off for a week and come with me."

"But I want to."

"I'll see you in a week, okay?" he tried to sound excited but you could tell he was faking and wanted me with him. I guess I was that amazing. Of course. "It'll go fast, I promise."

"Ugh," I sighed. "No, it won't." I pouted though he couldn't see me. Suddenly he started laughing.

"I know you're sad and pouting right now, Mallory." How the fuck? "But you need to get through the week and I'll see you when I get back. And if it all works out, I can get my own place, instead of living at the stupid hotel. It's a good thing."

I sighed anyways again. "Fine. But I'm still so frigging pissed, you know?"

"Yeah," he chuckled. "I know. I love you."

"Yeah, yeah," I shrugged, "I love you, too."

"Night."

"Bye."

And we hung up and I was left with all these sad thought about going a week without seeing Jacob. He really had turned me around from who I was. Ugh. What was happening to me? It made me laugh a short laugh to myself in my dark bedroom, thinking about how different I was when he met me. When Doug and Lois met me.

The next morning, I woke up all excited for the day and then I remembered Jacob was gone. This was going to be a hard week. I got ready for the day and met with some of the girls from work. Thankfully, I still had kept my boyfriend a secret from them.

Believe me, I love them and all, but if they knew I had a boyfriend, especially a delicious-looking, yummy, gorgeous, sexy, sweet and romantic one, they'd try to steal him in a fricking heartbeat.

They were not getting my Jankowski.

The days all went by in a blur and I barely remember much from them. Going to work, meeting the girls, talking to my boss, lunch with Lois, lunch with Doug, dinner and worst of all, waking up to realize he was still not back yet.

Six days after I found out he was out of town, Jacob's cell number flashed on my phone's screen. I rushed to answer. "Finally!" I screamed happily and as loud as I can. Whenever we called each other, we got the other's voicemail so it was good news to hear his voice again.

"Hey," he chuckled a bit at my excitement. "I'm looking for Mallory. This is supposed to be her number. You know where I can find her?"

I gave a look though he couldn't see me. "Jacob."

"Hey, baby," he smiled through his voice. "I miss hearing your voice. It's not enough to hear 'This is Mallory's phone and leave me a message of fuck off' for six days."

I laughed, "I know. Hearing 'You've reached Jacob and he's out of town missing his hot as hell girlfriend. But leave a message after the beep' is not enough for me either."

"So you know I changed it then?" I laughed even harder then. "Shit."

"Don't worry," I replied, "I'm missing my hot as fuck boyfriend, too." I smiled this town and I could tell the shit-eating grin he was giving by his silence. "So what's up with the job?"

"I may have gotten it," he answered. "The boss came back earlier today and I have a big shot. I asked if it were possible for me to live somewhere else and commute, he said yeah. But I still wish I didn't have to. It'd be nice if the job was in New Orleans."

"I know," I said back, "Maybe he could get you a job here, if he puts a good word in."

"Yeah," he responded. "But I think I'll be back in a few days. I'm gonna be exhausted though. Maybe I'll get someplace in-between here and there, you know?"

"That means further from me," I stated.

"Yeah," he whispered. "But we'll see, okay?"

"Okay," I whispered back. "So tell me about the town. What's it like?" I settled down on my couch and he started telling me stories about the crazy things he'd seen on the street.

**A/N: I couldn't think of another Louisiana town for Jacob to be going to for a job. I'm pretty bad at geography related things so I hope it's not too far for a commute.**


	12. E is for the Ecstacy

"Jacob Jankowski?"

The voice shook me out of my thoughts, causing me to shoot right up instead of just standing up. I was heading into my second meeting of the week – right now I was going to find out if I had a chance at this job. I knew it was going to be a commute. One I didn't necessarily want, but I needed a job and this is what I was good at.

"Jacob?" The big boss, Mr. Jenkins, asked me as I walked into the room.

"Yes," I nodded, forming the biggest smile I can for the meeting to choose my fate.

"So," he started, while standing up to shake my hand. I shook it, as I was always told to by my father. Whoever was on the receiving end was supposed to get a sense of who I was. I would have rolled my eyes if I wasn't trying to make him believe I agreed with him. "I've been looking over your file and resume."

"Okay," I nodded along as he sat back down. I did the same.

"It all seems pretty good." He flipped through the pages of my file, skimming through it once again. "You were working for…Ringling Circus?" Another nod from me. "What caused you to leave?"

I swallowed. I hadn't worked that answer out. I quickly thought up something. "Um, the traveling. I wanted to settle on one place to work."

"I see," Mr. Jenkins nodded. "It says your father was a veterinarian?" I nodded again. "He had his own business?"

"Yes, sir," I answered. "I would have joined it but my father passed a few months ago and his business was one of the things that got sold. I didn't have much say in that part."

"Oh," he just said. I didn't think this was going too well so far. "Well, Mr. Jankowski, I think you are incredibly qualified to work here with us. Cornell graduate, runs in the family, worked on a Circus. Ringling, no less." He smiled brightly. "Welcome aboard, Jacob. You start Monday."

Mr. Jenkins stood up once again and held out his hand. "You're hiring me?" He nodded with a big smile. I shook his hand once again. "Wow. Thank you so much, Mr. Jenkins. I mean it."

He held up a hand, as if it was nothing. "Nothing to thank me for. You have the qualifications and a Circus is a good place to learn the business. I don't think you can call in sick there, huh?"

"No," I chuckled. "I guess not." My face turned serious for a minute there. "Thank you, though, really. It's…an opportunity."

"Like I said, no thank you necessary." I nodded and walked out of the room.

It was such a relief to know I had a real job now. There was nothing to be proud of with a Cornell diploma for veterinary work if you were jobless and living in a hotel while your girlfriend made hundreds of dollars a night. But maybe her job made me a bit more uneasy than my own employment did.

As soon as I got to the elevator, I pulled out my phone and began dialing. It rang a few times and then she answered. "Hello?"

"Guess what just happened?" I practically screamed with excitement into the phone.

"Who's this?" she asked me.

"Mallory," I said, making a serious face even though she couldn't see me.

"Lyle!" she yelled. "I told you not to call me! My boyfriend could easily find out about us!"

"Mallory, that is not funny."

She started laughing hysterically on the other end. "It was a little bit funny." Her laughter calmed down a little bit. "So, what happened?"

"I got the job!" I screamed into the phone. I heard a cheer of happiness on the other end, some mock-cheering, and then real excitement.

"Oh, I'm so proud of you," she sighed. "When do you start?"

"In 3 days," I sighed back. "Are you prepared for this?"

She took a deep breath. "Yes. As long as you are happy, I am happy. And you know me at this point so that is not a 'me' thing to say."

I smiled. "I know. So we're gonna be okay?"

"Why wouldn't we be?"

"I…" I didn't know how to get this part out. "I was considering maybe getting a place here."

Another deep breath. "Where, exactly, is this job again?"

"It's in Baton Rouge," I answered. "It's an a hour and a half drive. Do you want me to say no?" The elevator door opened and I walked into the lobby and towards the door.

"No," I could tell she was shaking her head. She didn't like the idea and to be honest, either did I. "No, you should take it. Of course. I don't want you choosing whether or not to take a job, one that you love, because your girlfriend lives over an hour away."

I could tell she was trying to convince herself more than me. "You know you matter to me, right?"

"Yes."

"Whether or not you are comfortable with this," I started, "matters to me." I started walking to my car the second I got out of the building and climbed into it. I leaned against the seat and waited for her response.

"I know," she confided. "I do, really. And I love you for it but you want this job. Besides, I can be a stripper anywhere, right?" She laughed uncomfortably at the end of her sentence and I knew it was because of what she told me about getting another type of job.

"You don't always have to be a stripper, Mallory," I tried to console her.

"Yeah," she said, sarcastic. "Like that's gonna happen." I sighed and waited for her to continue. "I'm never gonna be able to get a real job, Jacob. I'm a fucking dancer. It doesn't exactly mean 'high profile lawyer' or some shit like that, you know?"

"Look," I cut in, "You could be anything. Okay? It's those assholes out there. It's their problem that they don't want someone as amazing as you working for them."

"You have to say that," she whispered. "You're sleeping with me."

"No, that's not why I'm saying it."

"This is supposed to be about you!" she interrupted. "You got an amazing job that you really wanted, so this is about you, okay?"

"Okay," I nodded. "Me. All about me." She started laughing at me, which caused me to laugh back. "I gotta get going, okay? But I will be back maybe tomorrow, okay?"

"Okay," she said. "I love you."

"I love you, too. Bye." And we hung up.

I leaned my head completely against the head rest. Being an hour and a half away from Mallory was not going to be easy. I could barely function a week away from her. Imagine living that way.

It was probably lame or not so masculine but I knew Mallory was the best thing that ever happened to me. Meeting her that first night took my mind off of everything that was going on around me. I was able to not think about losing my parents for a few hours. That was definitely something I'm glad for.

She made me smile that night.

But leaving her now seemed so out of the question. We were close now. Obviously since we were boyfriend and girlfriend, together for about 2 months now. It was soon going to be longer than my last relationship.

I was happy to hear that since that was only three months and this was Mallory.

I don't even know what made me love her exactly but I was glad she loved me back since other girls might not have been so understanding.

xxxxxxxxxxx

Sleeping at the hotel that night was a bit depressing. I kept thinking about buying a place and moving here. Tomorrow, before I left, I was gonna have to put a down payment on at least an apartment.

My cell phone chimed and lit up the small space. I picked up and saw it was from Mallory. It read:

_Miss U._

I typed in a quick response.

_Miss U Too._

It chimed fast again.

This time it was a picture. She was laying in her bed, only in a bra and panties. Obviously making me miss her more. Then wondering how the picture got taken. I typed again.

_and who took that pic?_

Another chime.

_phone timer._

Another one.

_i set it up to match my bed. perfect xD_

I smiled a bit then texted her back.

_Maybe you can match it up again for me?_

Another chime.

_Maybe you'll be in the shot next time…_

Fuck. This girl was going to be the death of me.

_Maybe…_

Simple answer and all I texted back. I waited a moment for the next one.

_I love you_

_I love you too_

We stopped texting for the night because I had a busy day ahead of me tomorrow.

xxxxxxxxxxx

The morning went by fast. I got up and got ready for the day. When I was looking at apartments, I started thinking about what Mallory would look like in them. But I doubted she could get off to come see me here that often, which put a sad path in my mind.

Finally, after looking at five places, I pictured me in the sixth one. It was a little more than I wanted to spend but it was worth it. After giving a check for this and last month's rent, I almost ran out of the place and got in my car. It was 5:30 pm already. I needed to go see Mallory.

The drive seemed to go faster than the first time, I thought. Maybe because last time I was leaving behind the person I wanted to be with the most and this time I was going to her.

I was at her house before I knew it, knocking at the door. "Who is it?" I heard her yell.

"Jacob!" I yelled back. I heard a few noises from where sounded like the bedroom before she answered me.

"Come in!"

I opened the door slowly, not knowing what I'd find. Everything looked as normal as usual but Mallory was nowhere to be found. "Mallory?"

"In the bedroom," she called out to me. I walked towards the bedroom and saw her standing there, in her club uniform like that night she came to my hotel. She walked over towards me with a huge smile then pressed her lips to mine.

"What's going on?" I managed to mumble against her lips. She kept kissing me, delaying her answer.

"I missed you," she smiled as she pulled away. "And, you are leaving me again in 2 days. I wanted you to have a nice welcome when you came here."

I looked down at her, happy to be back with her. "This is _definitely_ more than a nice welcome."

She smiled wider and sat down on the bed, patting the spit next to her. Once I was next to her, Mallory started loosening my tie before taking it off. Next her hands started on my shirt buttons, opening about three of them before stopping.

"I got a place," I said to her when her hands moved to my lap. "This nice apartment. I want to show you it sometime."

"Good," she grinned. "That's great, Jacob. Really. I'm so fucking proud of you."

I smiled brightly back at her as she stood up. I was about to ask her where she was going but she walked over to the stereo. A rock song I didn't recognize came on the speakers and she started to move a little.

"I have a present for you," she gleamed.

_"No" is a dirty word,_

_Never gonna say it first,_

_"No" is just a thought that never crosses my mind_

"What's that?"

"Me."

Her moves turned into a full-out dance, moving and grinding to the music, more seductive than she does at the club.

_Maybe in the parking lot,_

_Better bring your friend along,_

_Better off together than just one at a time_

_S is for the simple need._

_E is for the ecstasy._

_X is just to mark the spot,_

_Because that's the one you really want._

_(Yes!) Sex is always the answer, it's never a question,_

_'Cause the answer's yes, oh the answers (Yes)_

_Not just a suggestion, if you ask the question,_

_Then it's always yes. Yeah!_

The song lyrics matched so perfect to how she was dancing. Her hips moved exactly to the beat and I began thinking she rehearsed this.

_I'm loving what you wanna wear,_

_I wonder what's up under there?_

_Wonder if I'll ever have it under my tongue?_

_I'd love to try to set you free,_

_All of you all over me._

_Love hearin' the sound you make the second you're done_

My mind started going crazy as I was thinking the same thing as the lyrics. Mallory was feeling herself up and down as the music continued, hips moving when the beat moved. I was getting hard just watching her. I couldn't even imagine when she actually came to me.

_S is for the simple need._

_E is for the ecstasy._

_X is just to mark the spot,_

_Because that's the one you really want._

_(Yes!) Sex is always the answer, it's never a question,_

_'Cause the answer's yes, oh the answers (Yes)._

_Not just a suggestion, if you ask the question,_

_Then it's always yes. Yeah! (YES)_

_Yeah, yeah, yeah_

_Yeah, yeah, yeah._

_Yeah, yeah, yeah._

_Yeah, yeah, yeah._

Mallory started to smile a teasing smile and licked her lips. She knew she was baiting me and I couldn't help but feel turned on. She walked over to me as slow as possible, killing me with every second she wasn't touching me. Finally she climbed into my lap and began kissing me deeply.

_S is for the simple need._

_E is for the ecstasy._

_X is just to mark the spot,_

_Because that's the one you really want._

_(Yes!) Sex is always the answer, it's never a question,_

_'Cause the answer's yes, oh the answer's (Yes)._

_Not just a suggestion, if you ask the question,_

_Then it's always yes. Yeah! (YES)_

"You like your present?" she whispered into my ear, her hot breath creeping down my neck. I could only nod because words would have failed me at that moment.

Her hands started reaching down to my belt buckle as she undid it then took it off. Mallory then continued unbuttoning my shirt before taking that off too. She went back to my pants as we leaned down on the bed, her on top.

It was gonna be a fun night.

_Yeah, yeah, yeah._

_Yeah, yeah, yeah._

_Yeah, yeah, yeah._

_Yeah, yeah, yeah._

_YES_

**A/N: How did you like Jacob and Mallory's reunion? The song here is the awesome Nickelback song, S.E.X. I love that song and I definitely recommend hearing it, especially while reading. It was kinda perfect.**

**And I finally looked under a map and how long New Orleans is to Baton Rouge! Haha. It's not as far as I was thinking it could be, which works out good with choosing it. xD **


	13. Separation Anxiety

I woke up early the next morning, thinking about how I'd be leaving again in 2 more days. There wasn't really any way around it or to even try to get extra time with Mallory. After all, she has her job and I needed to pack up my hotel room.

I don't know how long I lied awake, sitting up in the large bed, watching Mallory sleep while letting my thoughts wander to the upcoming separation. The clock's number passed and changed, as did the sun. I wasn't exactly sure how we were gonna say good-bye to each other. Especially after admitting we love each other, especially hard for her to do.

Out of sadness, I grabbed my phone off the side table and snapped a picture of Mallory asleep. She began to stir in her sleep, but only moving her hair out of her face with her left hand.

She had never looked more beautiful.

Quickly, I placed my phone back onto the table and stood up. Maybe I should make her breakfast. I basically knew she liked scrambled eggs and bacon, even French toast. I wasn't too great of a cook though. I searched the refrigerator looking for the carton of eggs until I realized she had only one left in it.

With one look towards my sleeping girlfriend, I grabbed a pair of jeans and began to get dressed. After becoming fully dressed and able to leave the house, I grabbed my keys and went to the store. It seemed stupid but she deserved that breakfast.

The traffic was crazy for 8:00 a.m. Finally getting to the store seemed like an accomplishment of its own. The doors zoomed open and the place was insane crowded. I stole a quick glance off my cell phone.

December 18th, 2009.

I had no idea it was so close to Christmas. Time must have been flying in all my happiness. It felt like a race to get to the frozen aisles, where the eggs sat. Of course, there was a crowd of people all through the aisle.

"Excuse me," I half-murmered, brushing past all the people standing there and their carts. They turned to look at me like I was insane for walking near them. I sighed because this was going to be a while.

After excusing myself a few more times, I finally got to the cartons and checked through a few of them. Exhaling in relief that I had what I came for, I rushed to the lines. They were definitely not any better.

25 minutes later, with one item, I was out of the store. I didn't even want to think about this place when the actual holiday day was here.

Pulling up into the house, I saw lights on and I knew Mallory was up. Stealing her key from the slot in the front, I opened the door. There she stood, dressed and with wet hair.

"Hey," she beamed. "Where'd you go?" I walked over to her and she made it easier by following my lead. Mallory stretched up a bit to give me a soft kiss that I quickly responded to then pulled away.

"I wanted to make you breakfast," I explained, "but you had one egg left." She chuckled then laughed. "What?"

"I have another thing in there somewhere," she said between laughter. "You're so fucking adorable sometimes. You know that?"

"What?" I started to laugh with her as she made her way to the fridge, pulling it open and moving items around. There sat the full egg carton on the bottom shelf. "Shit."

Mallory laughed again. "So…make me breakfast, boyfriend."

I began to work after I stopped laughing at how I didn't just move some things over. She watched me intently, like she was trying to memorize it all.

"You know," I started, "I'm not dying. I'm just moving away."

"I know," she sighed. "But…I'm not going to be seeing you on a daily basis anymore. So I'm trying to keep all these sweet things you do close to me." Suddenly, she started laughing again. "God, why am I so fucking mushy?" I saw her cover her face in embarrassment.

"You're not mushy," I answered her. "You're amazing, you know that?" She shook her head, still covering her face. I saw the blush creep up her cheeks and began to chuckle myself.

The food was soon done and I placed Mallory's plate and eggs and bacon in front of her. She instantly grabbed a piece of bacon, biting off a piece. "Yum," she moaned. She began chewing another piece and I stared at her in awe more than touch my own food. "What?" she chuckled.

"I love watching you eat," I said without thinking. She just looked at me like she was waiting for the joke part. "I'm serious."

Mallory just rolled her eyes and smiled. "Don't tell my boss you saw me eat bacon, okay?" I nodded as she began eating her scrambled eggs. I started to eat my own too while looking at her every once in a while.

xxxxxxxxxx

"So how much do you need to pack?" Lois asked me as she walked in my hotel room with Mallory and Doug.

"Um," I started to motion with my hands. "Basically what's in the drawers. But I can put them in the suitcases and boxes. I was hoping Doug would help me move them out of here, though."

Lois nodded. "Okay, son," Doug replied. I needed to talk to him alone so I could make sure he wouldn't tell Mallory about Marlena and what I told him. There wasn't much chance of that with the girls here, though.

I headed for the dresser the hotel has in the room and grabbed some clothes out. Mallory opened up a suitcase for me on the bed. I smiled at her so she smiled back. Lois stood by the doorway with Doug, watching us but talking too. I hope not about what he knew.

"You guys gonna be okay for a few seconds?" Doug abruptly asked me and Lois. He was motioning for Mallory to go talk to him outside. Oh, fuck.

"Yeah," I swallowed and nodded. They walked out the door and Lois squeezed more into the room. "Am I doing to wrong thing, Lois? Leaving Mallory?"

She took a deep breath before answering. "No," she shook her head. "I don't think so. You're doing what needs to be done – getting a job, one you're good at and that you love. Mallory will be fine. She's used to taking care of herself."

"I know," I whispered. I turned to face her but she was already facing me. "That's why I'm worried, you know. Leaving someone who's used to being left. I don't want to do that to her. Mallory's opened up to me and she's brought out a side of me I didn't even know was there. Could this change all that?"

"No," Lois smiled. "I don't think so." She walked towards me, placing a hand on my shoulder. "You see, Jacob, Allison loves you and she knows you love her. That's the difference between the other times she's been left and now. Her father was never there and her mother never told her." I sighed, glad I got an answer to not let me feel any more shitty then I do. "But you have told her."

I nodded, to agree with her and confirm that I have told her.

Lois sighed and moved to give me a hug. It was the first time it'd ever happened but I welcomed the acceptance. "You're a good man, Jacob. I'm happy Allison has someone like you in her life."

"Thank you," I smiled as she pulled away. Mallory and Doug walked back in. I went back to throwing things in the boxes and suitcases.

Once everything was done and put away, Doug and I walked out of the room, each carrying something. When we got to my car trunk, I sighed.

"Doug?"

He looked at me, like he was expecting this. "Yeah?"

"You remember that thing we talked about? At that first dinner, I mean." He only nodded so I continued. "You won't tell Mallory about what I said, would you?"

"No," he sighed. "I'm not a person who tells other people's secrets, Jacob. But also, I warn you it's a bad idea to keep those secrets too. The relationship may be over but there is still something in the past of you with another woman. And you might want to bring that up with your girlfriend. Just saying."

He pushed the box he was carrying to the end of the trunk, all the way back. I pushed the one I was holding next to his and we walked back to the room in silence. Mallory and Lois were standing there talking but became quiet when we walked in the door.

I decided not to ask any questions. I just grabbed two suitcases as Doug grabbed another box and we walked out. This time, the girls followed.

Soon everything was all packed up and we four stood there in the parking lot.

"We might be going back home," Lois sighed out of the blue.

"What?" Mallory's head whipped towards her with a puzzled expression. "You're leaving too?"

"Sweetie," Lois took hold of both of Mallory's arms. "We have to get back to our jobs and our home. We're not leaving you, not really."

"We didn't know when to bring it up," Doug explained. "With your boyfriend leaving and then us thinking about it, it didn't seem right."

My girlfriend looked over at me, tears trying not to form in her eyes, and she sighed. 'I'm gonna be all fucking alone."

"No," I said on instant. "I'll come as much as I can, every weekend. And holidays. It's only an hour and a half drive, Mallory. You can see me whenever you want to see me. And I'm sure the Riley's are thinking the same way."

Lois nodded fast, trying to make sure Mallory knew it was true.

"But if I'm having this really shitty day," she explained, "and I want my boyfriend. I have to wait until you're off work and even without that, an hour and a fucking half. What if I really need you?"

I walked over to her and Lois let go of her arms. I held Mallory to me as soon as I reached her and hugged her tight. "Think of it this way, okay? I always need you and I won't see you always."

"That makes it worse," she sniffled.

"I love you," I whispered, leaning my face towards her ear so only she would hear me. "Nothing's going to change that, all right? Not time and sure as hell not distance." Mallory nodded into my shoulder and sniffled again.

"You have two more days, right?" Doug asked me. I turned my head to face him but my body still turned to Mallory, still holding her to me.

"Yeah," I responded. "I have to be there Monday, 7 a.m."

"Just spend it together," he answered me. "We're probably going to be leaving after Christmas, anyway. So we have an extra week with her." I nodded a silent answer. "Are you coming back for the holiday?" Another nod from me. I felt Mallory relax against me so I knew she knew my answer.

"Good," Doug smiled. "We're gonna get going, okay?" Mallory pulled away from me and wiped her eyes. They were puffy, red and wet. She nodded as she walked over to Doug and hugged him tight. "Love you."

"Love you, too," she whispered back to him, her voice unusually small. After they separated, she went to Lois and they hugged.

"Love you, too, Allison," Lois smiled. I heard Mallory whisper her response again. I was glad she had these people in her life.

After the final hug, the two of them walked away, leaving me and Mallory standing there in the parking lot. She walked over to me once again and I wrapped my arms around her.

"We're gonna spend every second together these next two days," I sighed, kissing the top of her head. We watched the car leave as Lois waved from the front seat.

Mallory nodded against my chest like before. "I love you so much," she whispered, her voice sounding like it was going to break again.

"I know," I whispered, tightening my hold on her. "I love you, too."


	14. Time of my Life

I had to be honest – this wasn't exactly the way I was planning on spending my last two days with Jacob. I couldn't remember how long we stood there after Lois and Doug drove off. He held me, patiently and quiet, giving me time to adjust that they were leaving me, too.

Unwillingly, I pulled myself out of his arms and turned to face him. "We should do something, you know," I managed to say. "This is your last couple of days. Let's do something fun." I managed a smile at the end of my sentence but he must've seen through it.

"Are you okay?" Jacob half-whispered, wiping at my wet eyes. "We can do anything you want to. Just…tell me you're up for it and we'll do it."

"I'm up for it," I nodded, a bit too fast. "I should just go wash my face, splash the water on me and I'll be fine." Another smile appeared on my face although I didn't know how it looked to him. He smiled back, but it was a small smile.

Jacob reached for my hand and we walked back into his room, searching for anything we might have left behind. I walked into the bathroom, not exactly knowing what I was searching for in my expression. He just watched me and didn't say anything.

I shut the door slightly behind me. Looking in the mirror, my eyes were really red. My cheeks and underneath my eyes were soaked. I could only imagine how I looked to Jacob, Lois and Doug. The water was cool and it calmed my emotions down a little. After splashing it on my face, I sat on the toilet in the room and just thought.

I knew I needed a clear mind when I went back out there to Jacob. Maybe I'll plan some big, effing date night and ask for the night off at the club. Or call in sick. Whatever shit works.

It was obviously a big shock the Riley's were leaving in a week. I don't know what I expected. They had lives outside of visiting me and they were here for a while. It was time to go back to my life. The thing that surprised me the most was I didn't expect my reaction. I'm not a crier, never was.

Maybe there are more changes in me lately then I thought.

"Mallory?"

There was a soft knocking on the door as I heard Jacob's voice call my name. I stood up and took another glance in the mirror. I didn't even realize I began crying again so I wiped the new tear off my face and opened the door wide. "Yeah?"

"Are you sure you're okay?" He asked me. There must had been something in face confirming I wasn't so I shook my head. "We can just hang out, you know. We don't need to do anything big for this weekend."

"No," I replied. "We do. This is your freaking weekend, all right? You pick something you wanna do."

"Um, I don't know," he shyly answered. I laughed at that and he smiled because it was a real laugh. "Let's just go to your house, okay? We can sit back, watch a movie, even. Then if you're up to it, we'll do something."

It took me a few seconds to answer. "Sure," I shrugged. "I don't know what's so great about sitting at home with me, you know."

"I do," Jacob beamed, "it's sitting with the girl I love. I don't need much more than that." I couldn't help it and stood on my tiptoes and kissed him. He chuckled. "Except I could be doing more of that with the girl I love."

I hit him lightly on the arm and he held it as if it really hurt. We both laughed as he put his "good" arm around me and we went to check him out of his room.

xxxxxxxxxxxx

The drive was short from the hotel to my house but we needed to get his car somewhere besides that parking lot. Jacob got out of the car first and opened my door for me. "Wow," I smiled. "Now I feel like some rich fucking princess."

"That's what I was going for," he smiled back at me. "So what could we watch?"

I thought for a moment and realized I didn't have many dvds. Working at a strip club didn't leave much time for movie nights. "Shit," I whispered.

"What?"

"I don't have much here," I sighed. "Should we rent something?" I looked at him for a moment and he did the same. The perfect movie crossed my mind then and I happened to have it. "Wait. I have the perfect idea."

"Like what?" I raced to get the key and hurriedly opened the front door. Jacob kept a steady pace behind me as I grabbed the movie off the shelf. "_Dirty Dancing_?"

"Fuck yes!" I exclaimed. "It's got romance, the disapproving parents, awesome 80's music and most of all – dirty dancing." His face grew a big smile on it.

"I never knew you liked this movie," he said. "Let alone, owned it." He gave the cover another glance-over. "This is good because I haven't seen this movie in a long time."

"Yes!" I jumped into his arms, happy I had the choice movie at my house. He hugged me back instantly. My hands went to his hair. I was really going to miss that hair. "I love you," I whispered so low I wasn't sure he even heard me.

"I love you, too," he sighed. "I'm really gonna miss this excitement you have, you know."

"Ssh," I whispered. "No leaving or missing talk until the time comes, okay?" I pulled out of his arms and placed both of my hands on his neck, forcing him to look into my eyes. "Tonight, we have dirty dancing then tomorrow, we're gonna find some fucking amazing shit to do, okay? No sad talk."

Jacob nodded at me. "No sad talk."

"Let's start the movie," I smiled.

xxxxxxxxxx

I had always loved this movie but somehow, watching it with Jacob made me love it even more. Maybe it's all that psycho-babble bullshit about "being with the person you love". Whatever. A couple of months ago, I didn't even believe in love.

Jacob leaned over to me when "Hungry eyes" came on and started to sing the lyrics in my ear. It sent chills through me to listen to him sing. The good kind of chills.

"One look at you and I can't disguise, I've got hungry eyes," he whispered to me. I felt the blood rushing out of my brain as his breath hit my neck. When the song was over, he went to his regular sitting position and smirked.

He knew what he did. And he didn't care or mind. I reached out and held his hand for the rest of the movie. I may have also leaned my head on his shoulder, smiling at the comfort.

Near the end of the movie, Jacob put his arm around me. At first I thought it was a sweet gesture. That is, until I realized his hand going lower and aiming for my boob. "Hey," I scolded him. "No coping a feel until the end credits go off."

He gave me a pout and moved his arm back to his side. I loved the power over him yet also loving his power over me.

Once the crew and cast's names appeared on our screen, Jacob flipped me on my back. "Hi," he breathed in a low voice.

"Hi," I said back. "What exactly are you expecting, Mr. Jankowski?"

"You said no coping a feel until the end credits," he answered. "The end credits are gone. Now where's my feel?"

I giggled a little and smiled. He lifted his hand and placed it on my arm, waiting for me to answer. "Well?" He looked at me confused. "You can feel me up without my permission, you know? Just not during _Dirty Dancing_."

He chuckled at first then placed his hand on my boob, giving it a light squeeze. I moaned, even though it wasn't much. He took this as motion to continue, placing his other hand on my hip. My breathing must've sped up or the movie just really turned me on but I wanted him so much in that moment.

"Wait," I mumbled as his lips reached inches from my face. "I have the perfect music for this." Jacob looked at me like I was crazy but his face also gave away like he liked when I played music for him.

Giggling, I stood up and went to my stereo, placing a familiar cd in there. After getting to the right track, I played it.

_Now I've had the time of my life _

_NoIi've never felt like this before _

_Yes I swear its the truth_

_And I owe it all to you_

Jacob started laughing. "You have the cd, too?" He managed to get out in-between laughs.

"Yep," I smiled. "I told you – I fucking love this movie."

_Cus ive had the time of my life _

_and i owe it all to you_

The music picked up as I went back to my position on the couch. Jacob quickly resumed his on top of me. 

_I've been waiting for so long _

_now i've finally found someone_

_to stand by me_

I began singing along with the music as he started to kiss my neck. His hands taking the same position as the last time, too.

_We saw the writing on the wall_

_As we felt this magical fantasy  
><em>

_Now with passion in our eyes_

_There's no way we could disguise it secretly_

His one hand roamed up my shirt and the other tugged on the loops of my jeans. I moaned at the feel of his hand on me and my hands went to his hair, almost pulling it out. That seemed to cause a growl-like sound from him.

_So we take each others hand_

_'Cause we seem to understand the urgency_

_Just remember_

_You're the one that I cant get enough of_

_So I'll tell you something_

_This could be love, because _

One of my hands roamed down his head as moved his head back to my mouth and began kissing me. I instantly kissed him back, like there was any other fucking choice. His fingers began to peal my shirt off slowly over my stomach.

_I've had the time of my life_

_NoIi've never felt this way before_

_Yes I swear it's the truth, and I owe it all to you_

"Take it off," I whispered. He pulled away and did as I asked. Jacob hovered over me, staring at me laying there beneath him in my blue bra for who knows how long before his lips devoured mine again.

_With my body and soul_

_I want you more than you'll ever know_

_So we'll just let it go_

_Don't be afraid to lose control, no_

I reached to the hem of his shirt and started to lift his off. He pulled apart and threw it off for me. I stared at his bare chest about as long as he stared at mine before pulling him down to me again.

_Yes I know it's on your mind_

_When you say "stay with me tonight"_

My fingers inched their way towards his zipper and opened up the buckle first. After that hurdles were gone, I started pushing his jeans off of his hips. He made a move to help me out but I shook my head and pulled them down the rest of the way with my feet.

_Just remember_

_You`re the one thing_

_I can't get enough of so I'll tell you something_

_This could be love..._

There he was hovering over me in only a pair of boxers and I felt like I couldn't get enough. His hands and kisses heated me up everywhere as they once again roamed down to my hips, this time trying to get my jeans off.

_Because I've had the time of my life_

_I've never felt this way before_

_Yes I swear, its the truth_

_And I owe it all to you_

He pulled them down slowly and kissed his way as he went lower. I moaned in response once again. "Fuck," I groaned, causing him to give me a wicked grin.

More like "panty-dropping grin."

'_Cause I've had the time of my life_

_I searched through every open door_

_'Till I found the truth_

_And I owe it all to you_

My hands were yanking his hair as got my jeans off of me. His face came back to mine and attacked my lips, causing us both to moan this time.

Suddenly, I was rising from the couch and Jacob was carrying me into the bedroom. After lowering me to the bed, I grabbed him by the back of the neck and brought his face to mine.

He must have had other ideas because he didn't follow. Only shook his head, giving another wicked smirk and started kissing my legs. I leaned my head back and felt his cool mouth on me.

I've had the time of my life

(ooh)

No I've never felt this way before

(never felt this way)

Yes, I swear, it's the truth...

And I owe it all to you

He slowly pulled the last items of my clothing off and I pulled off his. This was gonna be a fan-fucking-tastic night. I smirked his smile as it continued.


	15. Goodbye to you

My eyes did not want to open. It wasn't because of the sun, or the fact that it was morning. It was it being my last day with Jacob before he leaves tonight. Sundays were never my favorite day but this particular one was the fucking worst.

I felt fingers brushing at my hair and tracing circles on my back. I felt like one of those lame-ass romances when I sighed. You could pretty much tell Jacob had a huge fucking ass smile on that incredibly gorgeous face. My opened a little bit to see that I was right. "Hi," I whispered, trying to delay the morning.

"Hey," Jacob whispered back. He kept playing with my hair and moved it out of my face to see me better. "What do you wanna do today?"

"Stay right here all day," I answered, moving up towards him and wrapping my arms around him. His arms instantly wrap around me. "This is pretty fucking perfect, don't you think?"

"Yeah, it is," he sighed. He knew he couldn't stay here. He couldn't even spend the whole night here since he had to leave early tomorrow. "If we were to get out of the bed, what would you do?"

I tried to think. "Dunno," I shrugged. To be honest, anything with him was fine with me, because like I thought before – I felt like I was in a lame-ass romance. All because of this man beside me.

"Come on," he pretend-whimpered. "There's got to be something you want to do with me today." I began to protest and he knew what I was thinking. "That includes getting out of bed," he corrected.

I pouted, half-joking. "Fine. But one day, you will stay in bed with me all mother fucking day, you know that, Jankowski?"

He laughed. "I'm almost considering it right now." I smiled, confident. My hand started to travel south when his caught mine. "Almost."

"Fine."

I sat up, my blanket falling off of me and crossed my arms. I knew I was winning because he tried to look everywhere but at me. Of course. I was pushing my boobs up by crossing my arms topless. He was powerless when I did something like that.

"We can't stay here all day," he finally turned to face me again. "Face" being the code word because he was having a hard time keeping his eyes on my face.

"Why not?"

"It's my last day," he answered, causing me to instantly get sad and drop my arms. Jacob grabbed the blanket and put it back over me. I gave him a look. "It's December. Do you really want to get sick because you're trying to prove a point to me?" I gave a thinking look and he smiled again.

I was really going to miss that smile.

"Well," I started, "There's this boardwalk, not too far from here. I've only been there when I first came here and it was really fun. There's games, rides and shit. Maybe you can even buy me a hermit crab or something."

"Okay," he beamed, happy I thought up something. "But no hermit crabs. Those things are expensive when you buy them on a boardwalk." We started laughing and I threw a pillow at him. "I should take a shower."

Jacob started to get up but I grabbed his arm. "Wrong."

"What?"

"_We_ should take a shower." His face lit up with a panty-dropper grin as he collapsed on top of me on the bed. His lips attacked mine and we were instantly out of breath.

When he pulled away from me, I groaned at the loss of his mouth but he stared into my eyes like he was storing it into his memory again. Not that shit again. We had a whole day to go before he left.

Before I had time to tell him to stop staring, his lips attacked mine again. His hands and arms were under my body and lifting me off the bed. I wanted to protest but he carried me into the bathroom. I was still wearing the sheet while he stood there completely fucking naked and sexy. I began to lick my lips as his crashed to mine once again.

In seconds, I was moaning and my hands were in his hair. He shut the door with his foot. It didn't really matter since we were the only ones there but who cared? All that mattered was what was going on with the two of us, right now.

He broke apart from me again and turned on the water, testing it to see how hot it was. Looking at him, I didn't need the water to keep me hot. My hands roamed over him as he felt the water temp. He shivered when he felt me touch him and I leaned towards him.

"Hot enough yet?" I whispered into his ear, my breath hitting him. Jacob shivered again and turned to face me.

"Definitely." There wasn't time for a witty response because he was kissing me again. My hands back in his hair and his went to my waist. They slid lower and he was holding on to my ass. I moaned, wanting him already but I knew we needed a real shower too. This time I broke apart first. He looked at me clueless and I stepped into the tub. He followed me.

I picked up the shampoo first and he held out his hand. After I poured in his hand, I turned around and he started to massage my head and hair with the shampoo. He understood without a doubt this wasn't going to be a quickie in the shower. I moaned feeling his hands on my hair and kept my eyes closed.

He laughed when I put shampoo into my own hands and tried to wash his hair. Why was he so much fucking taller than me? Jacob found this way too amusing when I tried to reach him.

When the shower was over, we dried off and he hugged me close. I breathed in the scent of him, doing exactly what I didn't want to do – storing things to memory. I don't know how long we stood there in our towels just holding each other. But I knew I never wanted it to end.

The phone rang, instantly breaking us both out of our world. He went to answer it for me. I watched how the towel slid a bit lower when he walked, re-thinking my plan to be good today or go to the boardwalk.

"Hello?" Jacob's voice said from a room over. "Oh, hey, Lois." Lois. She had some perfect timing. "No, she's right here." Silence. "Yeah, I can get her if you -" Another silence. "Yeah, today's the day. I can't believe I have to do this."

Ugh, this silences were annoying me. Why was she talking to him and not me, too? "Yeah, we do have plans today," he talked into the phone again, then he laughed. I could have sworn I saw a blush on his cheeks. "No, that's not the plan. We were going to go to the boardwalk. You know it?" Crickets were chirping. "That's too bad. Maybe someday, right?" Quiet again. "I'll get her. Bye, Lois."

Jacob walked back into the bedroom and handed me the phone. I took it, wondering what took so long since they barely knew each other. This was a good thing though. "Hey, Lois," I smiled, sitting on the bed.

"How are you doing, sweetheart?" she asked me, the pity not too obvious. "You're going to a boardwalk today?"

"I'm good," I answered, "We are." My head started nodding with my answer – weird. "I haven't been there since I first got here so it might be fun to show it to Jacob."

"That's nice," I could hear the smile in her voice. "Is it like Coney Island?"

"Yeah, kind of," I half-laughed. Jacob watched me as he went to get his clothes out. "I don't remember much but it's got games and shit. Even pigeons might fly over us and shit in our hair or something."

We both laughed at that and I saw a smile on Jacob's face as he pulled a pair of jeans out of his luggage. "Sounds very fun," Lois replied. "You guys going to be there all day?"

"You mean are we fucking today?"

I could picture her face turn white then to a blush in my mind. "No," she back-tracked. "I didn't mean…_that_. I meant, are you making any other plans?"

"Well," I decided to play with her. "I have a few more dates later so I could try to squeeze in more time with him, I guess."

"Allison," she said, serious. "I know this is hurting you and you're making jokes to cover it up. You don't have to pretend with me."

I couldn't answer at first. Lois was right but there was no way I was gonna admit to that with Jacob a couple of feet away. He got his last pieces of clothing out and went into the bathroom. Damn. I really wanted to see him get dressed but it also gave me time to answer.

Pulling on a robe and walking to the couch, I curled up on it. "You're right," I whispered. "I don't want to be doing this and I definitely don't want to be doing this today."

Lois sighed, understanding. "I remember how I was when Doug first went on his business trips. I couldn't handle him not being around the house, even with a daughter at home."

"But you got through it," I concluded. Of course she did. "I mean, you panicked less, right?"

"Right," she answered, still not convincing me.

"When did you be okay with him leaving?" I heard her take a deep breath and sigh on the other end.

"I never did," she whispered. "Everytime he walks out that door, I worry and miss him."

"Am I gonna be like that?" I asked her. "Am I gonna be miserable and worry like some fucking crazy person everytime he walks out my door?"

"I don't know," she sighed. "But I know you love him and he loves you. Take today and push away the fact that Jacob's leaving. Make today the happiest day of your life so far so next time you see each other is that much bigger."

"Okay," I whispered. I felt a tear slide down my cheek and rushed to wipe it. Before I heard any noise, I noticed Jacob had walked out of the bathroom fully dressed. He was staring at me and my heated, wet cheeks. "I should get going."

"Okay," she half-whispered back. "Have fun today and remember what I said. Bye, sweetheart."

"Bye, Lois," I sniffled, hanging up the phone. Jacob was by me in an instant and sat down beside me.

"Are you okay?" he asked me, wiping tears off my cheek.

"Yeah," I nodded. "Just…I don't know what I'm going to do when you're gone. I got so used to you being around, you know?"

He nodded back. "I know." I sniffled again and he put his hands on my face, forcing me to look into his eyes. "I'll be back before you know it. Next week is Christmas and every weekend, too. You'll barely have time to miss me, Mallory."

"Yeah, right," I sarcastically answered. "My birthday's coming, you know?"

"It is?" He looked at me, surprised I didn't mention something like that sooner.

"December 31," I nodded. "I was so close to being a New Year's Baby." He chuckled beside me.

"We're gonna have to celebrate then," he said, putting his arm around me. "18's pretty big, huh?"

I chuckled this time. "Oh, yeah."

We sat there for a few minutes with me leaning my head on him. He kissed my head a few times before I suddenly stood up.

"Where are you going?"

I looked at myself for him to notice. "I'm wearing a robe. If we're going out, I think I need to get dressed."

He looked me up and down appreciately but then agreed. "Yeah, I can't have you going out wearing nothing but a robe. No other guy is seeing my girl."

I walked into the bedroom and pulled some clothes out. "You do remember I'm a fucking 'exotic dancer', right? Guys see my cooter almost every day."

I turned around and he was in the doorway. "But not in something that easily opens like a robe" – he pointed to me – "where you're naked underneath. And not in front of me are they staring at you, either."

"Ooh," I walked towards him. My hands ended up on his chest, wanted to touch him all over. "Possessive. I like it." I said that leaning at his ear like I did earlier.

Jacob held me by my arms and kissed me almost roughly but not in a bad way. I kissed him back because, well, hello, I am alive. His hands went inside of my robe almost to prove a point. They roamed over my shoulder blade and my stomach, finally holding onto my breasts. I moaned when I felt his hands give them a squeeze.

"You're mine," he whispered, giving me a few more squeezes before his hands went lower, teasing me. "It doesn't matter whether I'm here or Baton Rouge, or even fucking Asia, for all I care. No guy is touching or looking at my girl."

"No one," I moaned against his lips, opening my mouth for him. He massaged every inch of my body he could reach. I could barely stand up. Jacob was turning my legs into jelly without the orgasm. It had to be a record.

He pulled away first. "I'll let you get dressed, okay?" I nodded, dazed.

I barely remember actually putting the clothes on but soon we were out the door. Walking hand in hand with him made me smile and forget the oncoming goodbye.

The games were fun. We played that one where you shoot the water out of the gun to make the thing go up and he won. Fucking naturally. He won a stuffed bear, which he gave to me. We rode the roller coaster and some rip-off type tea-cup ride. I barely registered what we were doing with anything besides the fact that we were together.

Night came too fast. Before I realized it, it was 9:30 at night. I should have locked the day in my memory more.

Jacob walked me to my door and I knew what it was time for. "So…" he started, not wanting to face this either.

"Yeah," I whispered. "This day went so f-ing fast, you know? I don't know how to say goodbye to you."

"Me, either," he whispered. "But I'll be back next week, so this isn't really goodbye."

"I know," I sniffled, the tears coming. Jacob reached at my face and wiped them away while more began to fall. "I love you."

"I love you, too."

He kissed me sweetly then, not like so many of our other kisses where it's lead to something. This kiss was a 'I'll see you soon' or 'I'm going to miss you like fucking crazy and I love you like I already am' kind of kiss.

I kissed him back, my wet cheeks burning against his dry one. When he pulled away, he leaned his forehead against mine.

"I don't know what to say," I said, almost too low for him to hear.

"You don't have to," he replied. "Besides, if you do, I might never leave and I have to."

"It's tempting," I attempted a smile. "You have to go now, right?"

"Yeah," he sighed sadly. "I need to get there before I get too tired." I nodded, barely registering this was the last time I'd see him before Christmas came. "I love you, Mallory."

"I love you, too, Jacob," I replied back to him. He kissed me softly again, lips lingering on mine.

"I should go," he said, pulling back a little bit. I nodded again, too afraid to move. He kissed my cheek where the tears were spilling and walked off the stairs. I turned and he was walking towards his car. My eyes were blurry but I could still see him.

He waved at me as he walked to the other side of his car and got in the driver's side. I waved back and we stared at each other for a moment before he climbed in. The door shut and the car started. With another wave from Jacob, the car pulled out of its spot on my curb, taking my heart with it.

I fumbled with the key and ran straight to my bed and cried.


	16. Messages and First Days

I don't even know how I made it off of Mallory's street. The last thing that I saw her do was look like she was about to break. I hated feeling like I was the one making her look that way. But I was. And that was not making the rest of the drive, hell this week, any better.

Mallory's eyes looked red, ready to cry. That was going to be the last picture I had of her until next weekend. Even though I was gone longer last time, I think I liked being able to picture her naked as the last memory more than this latest one.

Somehow, I kept driving. I must have been on the road for a half hour already. The time was going faster than I thought. It gave me time to think about the good-bye. It wasn't supposed to be this long, drawn-out thing. We had wanted it be quick so that I'd actually be able to leave. I know if we sat together, me holding her, I never would have left New Orleans in time.

The signs passed me as my mind kept trailing off to my girlfriend back home. Yes, that was my real home. I may have been moving to another place but that was for the purpose of a job. Maybe one day I could get one closer to her or even better she'd come here. I'd love for her to get away from all those creeps she's used to being around.

An hour into my drive, my cell phone chimed. My eyes looked over for a second and saw Mallory's name light up the screen. She was texting me. At least it wasn't a phone call because I'd feel like shit if I didn't answer. At least with a text, I could wait a few minutes or so. But I needed to keep driving and I didn't feel like breaking any cell phone laws along the way.

Finally, after two hours of driving – there are more people than you'd expect on the road at this time of night – I made it to my new apartment. There was luckily already a bed inside there so I grabbed my bags out of the trunk and walked up to my new apartment. It wasn't even close to being the same as going home to Mallory. This place didn't feel like home. We may have only been together for a few months but she was my home now.

It didn't feel right to be anyplace else.

I unlocked the door and flipped on the switch with a sigh. _Welcome home, Jacob_, I thought. After my door was shut, I checked my phone. Simple words were written across my screen and it made my heart clench.

_miss you xoxo_

She sent me a message in the middle of probably crying. My girl was amazing. I instantly clicked 'reply' and sent her a message back.

_miss you too. just made it here _

I sighed deeply as I wondered if she was even still awake. My phone lit up, giving me happiness she answered but sadness that she probably wasn't going to be able to sleep.

_made it ok?_

_yes_

_whats it like?_

_empty w/o you_

It took a couple of seconds longer for her to answer this time. Then my phone started playing "Hungry Eyes" by Eric Carmen, a little gift Mallory did before I left. I instantly answered. "Hey," I smiled with relief.

"Hi," she whispered.

"It's nice to hear your voice after sitting through traffic, you know," I said to her, hoping she'd take it as a traffic joke.

"Was it annoying?" she asked.

I chuckled and went into my new bedroom. "Some people do not deserve licenses."

She chuckled a little bit too. "I know. You should see the guys that come into the club half the time. They're always so drunk that you'd wonder if they were when they went to take the test."

"Like hearing about drunken guys coming to where you work is making this easier, right?" I didn't mean for it to come out the way it sounded once it did.

She was quiet at first. "I'm sorry. I didn't think about -"

"I know," I cut her off. "I just meant, I'm going to miss you like crazy, you know that? And those guys are gonna be seeing you dance half-naked in front of them almost every night while I'm sitting here by myself."

"I know what you meant," she sighed. "I just – I wish this wasn't so hard, you know?"

"Yeah," I confirmed with a whisper. "I love you, you know that, right?"

"Yes," she said, causing a smile to form on my face.

"And you love me, right?"

"Of course," she replied.

"Then," I started, "this will work out. You and me are infested in this relationship. It's going to take a lot more than distance to break us up."

"Damn straight," Mallory answered. "I really fucking love you, Jacob Jankowski. I don't know how the fuck you turned me into this romantic tear-jerker girl but you did."

"All part of my charm," I joked.

She laughed. "We've gotta do something about that shit, you know? You're not allowed to make every girl be all lovey-dovey about you."

"Okay," I said. "Can I tell you a secret?"

"Sure."

"I don't want every girl being all lovey-dovey over me," I breathed into the phone. "I only want this certain one."

"Oh, really?" She was playing with me now.

"Yeah," I played along. "She's gorgeous. She makes me laugh. Sexy as hell and she knows it, too." I heard her chuckle a bit on the other end. "Her name's Allison."

The chuckle stopped. "You really know how to ruin the moment, huh?"

It was my turn to chuckle. "I guess I do."

"Well," she said, "I'll let you get away with it this once. Just once. Only because I love you so fucking much and I miss you like fucking crazy."

"That's good," I nodded. "Because I love you so fucking much and miss you like fucking crazy, too." I could almost picture the blush trying to form on her cheeks and how she'd try to hide it.

I looked at my watch for a second and noticed it was past 11:30 at night. "Shit."

"What?"

"It's late," I sighed in defeat. "I should get to sleep soon." I could see her nodding along, like she had been defeat too. "Are you gonna be okay?"

"Why wouldn't I be?" she questioned.

"Well," I half-stammered. "I didn't know how you were doing after I left tonight and you were still up when I finally was able to text you back, so -"

"I'm fine," she cut me off. "I'm me, remember? I'll be fine." It sounded more like she was trying to convince herself more than me.

"Okay," I said to not get her upset or anything like that. "I love you."

"I love you, too," she whispered. "Night."

"Goodnight," I said back as we both hung up the phone. I missed her voice already and not even five seconds had passed. I didn't know how I was going to make it through this week.

I began to get ready for bed, taking off my jacket first. My mind kept trailing back to New Orleans and Mallory. Was she going to be able to sleep? Did she just need to hear my voice again to make herself fall asleep? Is that why she called me? Soon I was ready to sleep, only brushing my teeth left and I laid down soon after.

The morning felt like it come so slow. The night must have dragged on and it could have felt that way to me since I was alone in the bed for the first time in a while. I looked over at the clock. 7:30, it read. I had to start getting ready.

My phone chimed. It seemed too early for texts but I checked it anyways.

_morning, sexy_, it read.

Mallory. I texted her back quickly as I began to undress for my shower. _Morning, gorgeous._

When I was stripped down to my boxers walking towards the bathroom, the phone chimed again.

_did i wake you?_

_no_, I sent back.

_what are you doing then?_

_going in the shower. you?_

_picturing you in the shower_

That put a smirk on my face. I could only imagine what she was doing while she thought of that. My phone chimed again but this time she sent me a picture. It was her hand and she must have run it under the water because it was wet, maybe a signal she was going to go in too.

At least it wasn't another type of picture. Otherwise this would end up a longer shower than usual. The phone rang.

"Are you trying to be sneaky?" I asked as I picked up the phone.

"No," Mallory giggled. "You made me want to take a shower. Preferably, a cold shower."

Just hearing her say those words sent a chill through me and made me want to be in there with her.

"I need to get ready," I gulped, unable to form many words.

"I know, I know," her voice turned serious this time. "I just wanted to wish you good luck on your first day of work. And I wanted you to hear it from me, not read it."

"That was sweet," I smiled.

She sighed. "Ugh, sweet." I chuckled at her reaction. "That's not what a dancer wants to hear herself called."

"Well, what do girlfriends liked being called?"

"Okay, I guess sweet works," the smile was obvious in her voice the next time she spoke. "But I miss hearing your voice in the morning. That's the real reason I called, okay? Now invoke the 'sweet' title to me, okay? I confess!"

I started laughing at her theatrics. "You're adorable."

"But sexy-adorable, right?"

"Very."

"Good," she sounded triumphant. "I'll let you get ready and get back to your shower." There was a slight pause and then she spoke again. "Think of me, okay? I know I'll be thinking of you."

"Okay," I gulped again. This woman was going to be the death of me. "I love you, Mallory."

"Love you, too," she replied. "Bye, Jacob."

"Bye," and we hung up. I went back into the bathroom and slipped off my boxers once the water was at the right temperature. Maybe a cold shower wasn't such a bad idea considering all the sexual frustration I was probably going to have this week.

Around 8:40 a.m, I was ready to go. It was about a 15-minute drive but I left anyway. The drive was cool and the air felt nice, not too cold for December. I found the building easily this time and pulled into the parking lot.

There was a receptionist I didn't recognize at the front desk when I walked in but I walked up to her. "Hi," I smiled at her, "My name's Jacob Jankowski and it's my first day. Where do I go to?"

Just as she was about to answer, Mr. Jenkins walked in. "Jacob!" he exclaimed. "I have everything ready for you, except we need a picture of you for your file and ID. But today, you're going to shadow Dr. Leonard. Just to get the feel of the place, you know?"

"Sure," I nodded, relieved I wasn't completely on my own on my first day. The animal hospital/veterinary building was bigger than I remembered. I walked side by side with Mr. Jenkins and we got my picture taken. I could only imagine the deer-caught-in-headlights look on my face in it.

We walked into another room. "Jacob, meet Dr. Leonard. Nick, meet Dr. Jankowski." The name sounded so formal and I wasn't used to it, unless it was my dad being addressed. Dr. Nick Leonard held out his hand and I finally shook it, feeling like an idiot it took me so long.

Mr. Jenkins walked out. I guess he only needed to introduce us then go back to his boss jobs.

"Jacob, is it?" Dr. Leonard asked me.

"Yes," I swallowed, suddenly nervous.

"Nice to see a younger face peak interest in what we do here," he smiled at me. He must have been 50, at least. He seemed wise beyond his years, too, as if he'd seen more than he should have.

"My dad was a vet," I answered. "I went to school to join him in his practice but then he passed and the business went to someone else."

"Oh," he said sadly, "I'm so sorry to hear that."

"Thank you," I whispered.

"My first appointment today is Leslie Nelson," he said, personal business aside. "She's got a collie puppy that seems sick so w'ere going to check on her, all right?"

"Yes, sir."

"You don't need to call me sir," he chuckled. "Nick is fine." Then he leaned closer to me and whispered. "In front of everyone else, call me Dr. Leonard, though. Wouldn't want them to think I was unprofessional, right?" I chuckled lightly back at him.

We must have seen a million dogs today but I knew that was an exaggeration. I wasn't used to checking on dogs but I knew I had to start somewhere lower before I got to what I was used to working with – horses, elephants, and things like that.

Animals I saw in the circus.

After a full day, I opened my apartment door and sighed. It was going to take some getting used to but it was worth it. I began to hook up my home phone and maybe go online and order some furniture. The only thing I had in here was a bed and some dressers.

I would need somewhere to put my clothes.

I sat on bed and opened up my laptop. I didn't expect to buy one but I figured I might need one since I had no internet, cable or phone connections so far. Pulling my phone out of my pocket, I noticed I had a voicemail. I called it instantly, hoping to hear the one voice I wanted to hear the most.

_Hey, baby_, Mallory's voice said. _I know you're at work, being awesome and helping all these animals but I missed you. Lois and Doug called me and asked me if I talked to you._ She chuckled. _I gave some smart-ass comments about sex; Lois scolded me in a nice way. The usual._ That part made me chuckle too.

_I miss you. Call me later, okay? I want some details._ There was a slight pause before she spoke again. _Who knows? Maybe even some phone sex. _She giggled._ I love you, and talk later, okay? Mwah._

I saved the message and dialed her number. It went straight to her voicemail so I decided she must be at work. I started checking some websites and checked out furniture for my new home.

**A/N: Sooo? What do you think about Jacob's first day? Him and Mallory miss each other so much, do you think they'll last long with the distance?**

**Leave a review **


	17. The old Mallory

_Beep_.

The phone chimed again. I had 5 unchecked messages – two voicemails and one text. I checked who called me in the last few hours and Jacob and Doug had both called me. I sighed, picking up my phone and read the texts first.

_Hey babe_, one from Jacob read.

_Call me_, from Lois.

Then another from Jacob, saying _I miss you_.

I wasn't sure I wanted to hear whatever voice message Jacob had left me. I missed him like fucking crazy and didn't want to hear his voice. The only way it was good to hear him was if he was on the other end to talk me out of crying. For some reason, he turned me into some crazy love struck girl and sitting here without him makes me want to fucking cry.

It was frigging disgusting.

I was never one of those girls – those whiny, obsessed with their boyfriend girls. Yet, here I am, being obsessed with my boyfriend. And it all seemed even funnier considering I'd slept with more guys then the amount of times he'd even had sex.

Sighing heavily, I dialed my phone's voicemail. I needed to hear it at some point and I hoped before the next time Jacob, or even Doug called.

The automated voice told me I have two unheard messages and I pressed some more buttons to hear them.

_Hey Mallory_, Doug spoke from my phone. I sighed in relief that his was first so I'd have a clear head when I listened to it. _Me and Lois were wondering how you're doing. We haven't talked in a few days and she's been bugging me to convince you to dinner some night. Let me know what you think and when. It's up to you, okay? Talk to you soon. Bye._

I deleted the message, making a reminder in my head to call Lois later and set up a time for dinner. Then I got through to the next message.

_Hey babe_, Jacob's cheerful voice said. I could tell he was trying to sound happier than he was. _Yeah, you were right. I was at work when you called me. They got me shadowing this other guy around to get the feel of the place, whatever that means. He chuckled softly. I miss you, too. More than you'd imagine someone missing another person._

I felt like crying but held it in as I kept listening. _It was nice to hear you're keeping up your bad mouth when talking to others. I bet Lois didn't appreciate that so much, though._ He chuckled again which caused me to giggle. _I'm going crazy here without you. This apartment is way too small without all your shit around. So is this bed. I need to get you down here soon. I guess I should go. I love you, Mallory._ There was a slight pause then he talked again. _Hey, about that phone sex? Were you serious? You know what? Ignore that. I love you. Call me back. Ok. Bye._

I saved Jacob's message and laid back on my bed. I sat there looking at my cell phone for a few minutes. The clock read 1:37 a.m. Jacob was probably sleeping since he had those professional hours now.

Sighing again, I sat up again. I needed to get my mind off of my boyfriend. I jumped off the bed and grabbed my shoes, running for the door. Once outside, I walked up to Tara's house since it was only a few houses down. Banging on the door seemed to wake her up because the lights were turned on.

"Who the hell is banging on my door at almost 2 am?" she asked, yanking open the door. "Mallory. What the hell is going on?" She looked me up and down in my tight jeans and t-shirt and was confused. "You do know what time it is, right?"

"Yep," I nodded, not really caring. "Let's go out."

"Where, exactly?" Tara crossed her arms and leaned against the doorframe. Obviously, it would take some convincing.

"I dunno," I answered fast. "Let's find some club that's open these hours."

"Oh!" she exclaimed. "I know just the place! Oh, wait – we work there."

"There's gotta be other places open at this time, Tar," I sighed. There had to be.

"Mal," she said, "What is going on? When you were single you never came on my doorstep in the middle of the night. And definitely not after one of your shifts. Weren't you working tonight?"

"Yes," I replied, "But I have a boyfriend now. One that's an hour and a half away, one I need to get off my effing mind before I go fucking crazy."

She looked at me with pity. "Don't look at me like that, Tar. I'm going insane sitting at home thinking about him. I miss him and I feel like a total girl. I can't be turned into a total girl. You know me, right?" She nodded. "You know this relationship won't make it if I don't keep some piece of the old me."

"I do know you, Mallory," Tara sighed. "But I do know that you getting drunk because your boyfriend got a job over an hour away is not really an answer."

"Why the fuck not?"

"You know why," she said. "You know how you get when you're drunk. You hit on every semi-attractive-looking guy."

"I won't do that," I whined, almost begging now. "Have you seen Jacob? Do you really think I'm gonna find _any_ of those guys we used to see attractive anymore?" She gave me a look that told me she agreed. "See? You agree."

"Doesn't mean I'm going out."

"Aren't your kids with your ex?" I asked her. She nodded. "This is perfect then! Please, Tara? Please?"

"Alright, okay," she gave up. "Let me get ready, okay? Some of us are not dressed for dancing and drinking at 2 a.m. you know?"

"Thank you!" I exclaimed and hugged her. "I owe you. Big."

"Babysitting?" she asked as she disappeared into her house.

Shit. "Maybe!" I shouted back. I could picture the smile she was giving me even in the dark because she knew how bad I am with kids.

A few minutes later, Tara reappeared wearing tight red pants and a black top, purse in hand. I was happy to be getting out of my house. We climbed in her car and searched for an open bar. There were not many in this town, which caused me to laugh a little.

Finally, we found a place and managed to get the last parking spot. Climbing out of the car, Tara was looking appreciatory at some of the guys she saw walk in. And they were looking back. I hope no one was looking at me.

We got in the club fast. Thankfully, my fake ID works in many places. The music was blaring and we made our way to the bar. The bartender was cute, mid-20's and looking straight at me. I tried to avoid eye contact as much as possible. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all.

But I needed to have some fun. I knew I needed a night out and I hadn't had one since Jacob came back into my life. In no way was I mad about that but there were times when a girl needs to go drinking with her friends and be crazy. Times to make them not lose the part of themselves they were before they went into the relationship.

"Beer," Tara said, sitting beside me when the bartender made his way over to us. I sat down next to her and tried to ignore the looks he was giving me.

"Same," I responded and saw him nod. He went to get our drinks then came back.

"You two new coming here?" the bartender asked trying to make small talk.

"No," I answered, knowing Tara was too busy scooping out other guys since this one was interested in me. "We used to come here all the time but I guess it's been a while."

"What made you stop?" he prodded. I just wanted him to go help someone else but I didn't want to seem rude.

"My boyfriend came," I smiled. He looked sad at first but then his expression changed.

"And how come the lucky guy's not here with you tonight?"

"Working," I nodded my head for some reason. "He got this amazing job and I missed him so I wanted to go out."

Why was I being so honest?

I felt Tara pulling on my arm. "I'm going to go meet that guy," she pointed in the direction of this dark-haired man sitting at a table. "You gonna be okay?"

I nodded. "Yeah."

She was gone in an instant. "So…." The bartender tried to start up the conversation again. "I'm Adam."

"Hi," I said, not giving my name back but taking a long sip of my beer.

"Do you have a name?"

"Nope," I laughed.

"Come on," Adam urged. "We're not cheating. I'm getting to know the girl sitting at my bar."

"Well," I leaned over the bar to whisper. "I think there's plenty of other girls here that want to get to know you." He took a quick look at the countless blondes and brunettes staring at him.

"So?"

"So…" I started. "I'm not one of them."

I grabbed my beer and sat at one of the empty tables. I could feel Adam's eyes on me from across the room and felt uncomfortable. I didn't like being looked at, not anymore. Not like this – sitting at some bar even though I wanted to go.

Taking some more sips, I emptied my bottle. I got up and stumbled a little bit, standing at the bar once again.

"You're back," Adam said as he walked over to where I was. "Another beer?"

"Yes," I half-slurred. I guess I got drunk fast. He got it for me and stood across from me again. "What now?"

"Are you okay?" he asked me and I gave him a questioning look. "I'm not asking to hit on you. You really do seem sad."

"My boyfriend's out of town," I sighed. "He's this smart, amazing guy who went to school to be a veterinarian and I'm not smart at all. I didn't even finish high school. I wonder if maybe him getting this job means he'll meet kick-ass people and know I'm not good enough for him."

"That can't be true," Adam sighed. "I'm sure there's no better than you…" he trailed off because I still hadn't told him my name.

"Mallory."

"Mallory," he beamed.

"That's sweet," I said, "but you don't know him. It surprises me every day that he settles for someone like me. We're so different, you know?"

"I had a girlfriend who was different from me, too," he sighed. "It didn't work out but not because we were different. She cheated on me with my roommate."

"I'm sorry," I couldn't help but feel bad. I started to search for Tara, who was talking to that guy she went over to an hour ago. They looked like they were having a good time.

"No," he held his hands up, waving them. "Please, no pity sorries. I kind of suspected it because she was always at my dorm waiting for me hours before I would get home. It was going on for a while."

"What a bitch," I burst out laughing. "I'm sorry!" I couldn't stop laughing but I didn't want to stop drinking either. "That just really fucking sucks, you know?"

"Yeah," and Adam started laughing too. "I'm glad you came here."

"Me, too," I smiled and I knew it was dangerous territory but it's not like anything was going to happen.

After that, me and Adam must have talked for hours. Before I even realized the time, Tara was tapping me on the shoulder. "We should get going," she said to me.

"What?" I said, whispered.

"Mal," she said, serious. "It's late. Or early, whatever. It's almost 4 a.m. We should get going. I'm pretty sure this place is closing very soon."

"Oh," I said, looking around the room. There wasn't many people left but the guy Tara had been talking to, me, Adam, her, and maybe 10 other people. I was surprised the place even stayed open with that many people.

I turned to face Adam. "I should get going."

"Bye," he smiled at me.

"Bye." I jumped off of the stool and stood up. "Ow," I moaned to Tara. "Remind me not to sit that long ever again."

"Ooh," she held up her nose in a mocking way as we walked out to the car. "Or drink that much. How much did you drink, anyways?"

"Um," I began to count on my fingers and re-counted then held them up. "This much."

She laughed. I must have had my numbers wrong. Tara carried me half on her shoulders the whole way home.

The phone rang loudly. _What the fuck?_ was my first thought. I was somehow in my bed, still wearing my clothes from last night. Tara must have did this. I stumbled out of bed and walked over to pick up the phone.

"Hello?" I mumbled into the phone.

"Mallory?" Jacob's voice said. "How are you? You didn't call me back or anything." I looked at the clock – 12:30 p.m. "Mallory?"

"Oh, sorry," I replied, putting my head on my forehead. "I must have overslept. I was working late last night then me and Tara hung out. It must've slipped my mind or some shit."

"Oh," he breathed in relief. "I was worried."

"You don't have to be," I sighed. "I'm sorry I worried you."

"It's okay," he said. "I just missed you."

"I missed you, too."

"So what are you doing today?"

"Dunno for the day," I shrugged. "Maybe food shop or something. But Lois wanted me to come over for dinner. Maybe I'll do that."

"Sounds good," he said. "I don't have much time. I tried calling you this morning but your cell phone must have been off. So I tried the house this time."

"I really fucking suck, huh?" I joked into the speaker.

"No," Jacob confirmed. "You're just you. As soon as you got used to having a boyfriend, he leaves. I guess that means I'm the one who sucks, right?"

"No," I half-smiled. "But I miss you so just do whatever it takes to make time go faster. I want this weekend already."

"Me, too," he sighed. "I should get going. They don't factor phone calls into lunch breaks."

I laughed which caused him to. "Okay. I love you."

"I love you, too."

And we hung up. I leaned down to the couch, holding the phone tightly to my chest and felt a tear fall down. I really wished my fears I confided in Adam last night really were false.

**A/N: Did Mallory do the right thing going out? She just needed a night out and of course, the bartender likes her! But it was innocent so there's nothing to tell Jacob…right? **

**And the next chapter is Homecoming! Hope you can wait a week for the reunion and Christmas for Mallory and Jacob! **


	18. Reunions and Christmas

I looked at the clock again. 11:45. I was supposed to be in New Orleans in about 15 minutes if I was right about my timing. I was so eager to get back home after my first week of being away. I knew in that I had my answer to whether or not I made the right choice, especially considering I was still calling New Orleans "home."

A week of shadowing Dr. Nick Leonard and getting to know people and their pets was working out good so far. It was more I felt like I wasn't exactly trusted yet to work with anyone on my own.

It was a scary thought to think I may have taken a job in a place I didn't know while leaving the person I love behind is a mistake. I loved my job. I loved the opportunity. I just wasn't sure I wanted to do it somewhere other than where Mallory is. She could always come with me to Baton Rouge.

But I knew her thoughts on leaving New Orleans. It's where she lives and loves. I didn't want to force her to come somewhere new with me. There was also the small part of what happened the last time she tried to start over in a new town. There was no way I wanted to put Mallory through that type of rejection all over again.

Maybe I would get myself a pet, one we could share together. I could ask one of my "customers" if any of their pets had puppies they wanted to give away. Who knows? Maybe they'd offer it on their own. That way, at least, we wouldn't be alone when we're apart. I could get two puppies each.

There was a flaw to that plan though: What if it reminded Mallory of why I left her? It was hard for me to imagine her thinking I cared more about my job and career than I cared about her. But who knew what she was thinking after a week apart? She could be ready for a permanent separation.

I needed to find a way to prove to her I really did love her. I wasn't going to leave her like her father did and I wasn't going to die on her like her mother. I was going to be there for her and she wasn't going to have to take care of herself, by herself forever. I would be there for her.

I just wish I knew what she was thinking. There were still a lot of things I didn't know about Mallory and there was details she still didn't know about me. I was hoping nothing I've held back would change her mind about me. Just like I was counting on anything she'd neglected to let me know to not change anything.

My thoughts had been going crazy for a week now. I'd been imagining Mallory running into a guy in a supermarket, maybe. Them talking and him making her laugh. Then they'd hang out and get to know each other, even fall in love. I wouldn't stand in her way but if this was my mind after a week apart, what would I do with a month?

I needed to stop this travel of my thoughts.

I looked at the streets passing me by. I was close to seeing my girl again. I just needed to prove my mind wrong. And there was nothing better than the hope I was gonna see Mallory again in just a few minutes.

Finally, I turned on her road and saw the familiar houses pass by. The easy to spot white house came into vision and I exhaled a relieved breath.

I was home.

I pulled into my usual spot since it wasn't taken at the moment and got out of the car. Taking two steps at a time, I was at the door fast. It opened before I even had a chance to knock.

"Jacob!" Mallory exclaimed as she pulled her lips to mine, not giving me a shot to answer her. Soon we were both breathing heavily and pulled apart. "I fucking missed you so damn much."

"I missed you, too," I sighed, letting myself relax in seeing her. One week is too long to be apart from this girl.

"Come on," she grabbed my hand and pulled me inside. There were candles lit and two dishes on the table.

"Are we having some feast I didn't know about?" I chuckled, eyeing her table decorations.

She turned her head to where I was looking. "Nope," she smiled, facing me again. "I just wanted to make it seem special for you when you came back. It's just po'boys though." She shrugged.

"Mallory," I smiled back at her, "that is so effing sweet, you know that?" I knew they were her favorite kind of sandwich and she'd never share her love for them with me. It was all a fear that I either wouldn't like them or I'd want to steal them away from her. She had no idea how nice this was for her to do for me.

But I needed to get one thought out. "You didn't need anything special done, you know?" She looked at me confused. "All I needed was to see my girl again."

"God," she sighed, pulling herself to me. "I really fucking missed hearing you say romantic shit like that, you know? When you work in a club like mine, you don't exactly hear the romance of things, you know?"

I held her to me for what felt like hours. I was instantly content to be standing here with her again, my earlier thoughts pushed away. There was no way we'd separate. It was obvious this girl in my arms loved me and I definitely loved her too.

"Do you wanna eat?" Mallory pulled away from me and searched my eyes. "They might get cold or whatever sandwiches get."

I laughed. "Yeah, let's eat."

I sat down and watched her walk into the kitchen. She got the po'boys out of the bag and unwrapped them from their paper. One by one, she placed them on the dishes she had set out. Mallory ran back into the kitchen and grabbed her lighter.

"You're actually lighting the candles?" I asked her as she raised the flame to the wax.

"Yes."

"Wow, you're going all out, huh?"

"Yeah," she laughed. "I guess I am."

She lit them both and put the lighter down. "Fuck," she sighed. "Do you want a drink or something? I have beer."

I didn't know she was still drinking but I avoided any accusations. "Sure," I smiled, "Beer sounds good."

Mallory beamed another smile at me and went the fridge, grabbing us both a beer before sitting down again. She picked up her sandwich but paused mid-lift. "I'm really happy to see you, Jacob."

"I know what you mean," I said, my eyes burying deep into hers for some sign she was okay during this past week. "I thought I was going to go crazy not seeing you."

I picked up my food and began to eat. "Me, too," she chuckled. "I was never the type of girl to obsess over a guy and here I was, obsessing."

She began to take bites and I thought there was nothing more amazing than the fact that she didn't care about what she ate. She was gorgeous and had no idea how much I loved she didn't care about the things other girls did.

"What?" she chuckled, wiping some gravy off her lips. It made me want to kiss her right this instant.

"You're beautiful," I said, still staring at her. I could have sworn I saw a blush on her cheeks and she ducked her head.

"Shut up and eat," she mumbled, embarrassed. But I knew she didn't mind.

Once I finally ate the first piece, I knew I was missing out on some good food. I smiled and moaned with my first piece, causing her to giggle.

"You keep up that moaning, I'm gonna have to take you right on the table," she said with a serious look on her face. That didn't sound too bad but I really wanted to eat this now that I started. It was delicious.

When we were finished eating, Mallory suggesting watching a movie.

"What about this one?" she asked, holding up a copy of _Charlie and the Chocolate Factory_.

"You have that?" I walked over to her and took the dvd from her hands. "I didn't know you liked Oompa Loompas."

"I do like them!" she laughed. "Fine. You pick a movie, then."

I searched her small shelf of movies and tried to spot one we both had in common. "Let's watch Halloween."

"You wanna watch a horror movie your first day back?"

"There's no bigger horror than being far from you."

"You're such a sap," she smiled, causing me to smile back. Mallory took the disc out of the cover and we settled on the couch once it was in.

We were at the part where Michael is going over Laurie's friend across the street from where she was babysitting when Mallory cowered into my side.

"Are you scared?" I whispered her hear and making her shiver. She shook her head. "Are you sure?"

"Yes," she whispered. "I just don't like how close he is to Jamie Lee Curtis, you know? She's his fricking sister and he wants to kill her!"

"Then why do you like this movie?"

"I like horrors and Michael's awesome." That caused me to chuckle because it was one of those things I didn't know about her. "What's so funny?"

"I never knew you even liked horror movies," I answered. "Or Michael Myers."

"Why?" she looked at me. "You don't like him having a spy who shagged him?"

I burst out laughing. "You did not just make an Austin Powers reference."

"Maybe I did," she shrugged then ended up laughing herself. "Okay, I know. That was pretty lame."

"No," I calmed down a bit. "But it's nice to be with a girl who knows about the guy who lost his mojo in time."

"See? I'm a fricking awesome girlfriend, huh?"

"Yes," I answered and leaned down to give her a kiss. It lingered after I pulled away and her eyes were still closed.

One minute she was leaning on me and the next she placed one leg on each side of me, straddling me. "I _really_ missed you."

Mallory leaned in and kissed me. I instantly responded and my hands went to her hips, which were moving with me. Her hands went into my hair as the kiss deepened. "The movie -" I breathed in the seconds I could.

"You know the ending, right?" I nodded and she went back to kissing me. My hands played with the hem of her shirt and she raised her arms. I lifted the fabric off of her body to reveal a black lace bra. I instantly hardened and she giggled.

My hands went back to her hips despite how much I wanted to get that bra off her. We'd been apart for a week and there was nothing that could compare to being like this with Mallory. She was panting and her hands traveled to my shirt. I followed her lead and pulled my shirt over my head.

She licked her lips and began to kiss down my chest. I groaned, wanting her even closer. She stopped and gave me a smirk. Fuck. Then she was back up by my lips and kissing me deep again, her chest brushing against mine. I could tell she was either really cold or really turned on. I knew which one she was.

A few hours of being like this and laying on the couch afterwards, we decided to get dressed and go out.

"I need to get you a present," Mallory sighed.

"No, you don't," I replied.

She sighed again. "_Yes_, I do." She went into a nearby store and I looked around the streets, happy and content. This was turning into one of the most amazing days ever. About 10 minutes later, Mallory reappeared from the store.

"Find anything?" I asked, eyeing her shopping bag.

"Yes, I did," she smiled. "I can't believe I didn't get it sooner."

"Come on," I urged, "let's go look around some more."

The night fast approached. Me and Mallory exploring every inch of each other slowly this time. I never wanted the day to end.

Tomorrow was Christmas and I was excited to spend the first Christmas with Mallory as a couple. It made this one worth it.

When the morning came, I walked out of bed, careful not to wake the amazing girl beside me. The living room surprised me. Was it like that when I went to sleep?

In a corner of the room, there was a small, white Christmas tree. Underneath it was presents. Not many, I guessed because there was only the two of us and she didn't have mine yet. I smiled, wondering when the hell she did this. I was probably asleep.

How in the hell did I sleep through her taking out a Christmas tree, no matter the size?

I decided to make her French Toast for breakfast. A little bit before they were all done, Mallory walked into the living room.

"Mmm," she moaned, smelling the cinnamon in the air. "Is that what I think it is?"

"Yep," I nodded. "I thought you might like something nice to eat since you set all this up."

"Set what up?" Mallory acted innocent and looked around the room, spotting the tree, which now held her presents under it too. "Maybe it was Santa!"

I laughed at her answer and she laughed a light laugh with me.

"Fine," she gave up. "I did it, okay?"

"It's nice," I remarked. "I didn't know you had a tree."

"It was my mom's," she answered. I didn't push her anymore on the topic and it became obvious Christmas was her and her mom's holiday.

"Food's done," I said, handing her a dish full of French Toast, eggs and bacon.

"Yum," she smiled and began to eat as soon as I walked to my seat. "I woke up starving."

"I did you some workout in the last 24 hours," I chuckled. She looked up and stuck her tongue out at me, giving me thoughts of last night.

We ate fast and she crawled over to the small tree when I cleaned up. When I was finished, I sat across from her and handed her a small box.

"Shit," she whispered. "This isn't like some expensive thing, is it?"

"Maybe," I grinned, waiting for her to open the paper. She ripped it off and opened the velvet box.

"This is too much," she half-whispered this time. I had gotten her this bracelet with the date we met engraved on it. It wasn't cheap but it wasn't the most expensive jewelry I'd ever been around.

"No," I replied, "it's not. I love you and I wanted to get you something nice, okay?" Mallory just nodded, tears looking like they were filling her eyes.

"I love you too," she answered. "This is so fucking sweet, Jankowski. Thank you." She leaned over and gave me a quick kiss then handing me a present. "It's not amazing or anything but still, it's for you, so."

"I'll love it anyway," I smiled as I began to unwrap it. It was a long box, taped together like crazy. I was trying to imagine Mallory wrapping this and chuckled on the inside. Pulling off the lid, I saw it was a white coat with a stethoscope.

"I know you're not a people doctor," Mallory began, "but I figured, animals have hearts too and you're still a doctor. So maybe you'd need it." Her words sped up near the end. She must have hated what she got me after seeing her present.

"I love it," I told her. "Really." She instantly smiled and I kissed her this time. "One more." I handed her another box, this one bigger.

This time she opened it a bit slower and took her time. I heard her giggle when she lifted the lid of her own box. "This is fricking awesome," she giggled, holding up the _Dirty Dancing_ title shirt I had made for her. It was pink and all.

"You like it?"

"Fuck yes!" she laughed. "I've never had someone buy me _Dirty Dancing_ shit, you know?"

"Now you have," I chuckled back. She tackled me and covered me with kisses.

"This is amazing," she smiled, sitting herself back up. "Thank you."

Mallory reached over and grabbed the last box under the small tree. I opened it and saw it was a new watch. It was bigger than mine and much better, newer. "Wow."

"So?"

"I definitely needed a new one," I said. "Thank you."

"You're welcome."

"Should we go meet Doug and Lois soon?" I asked her, knowing there was a high chance we'd never make it out of here if we kept looking at each other like this.

"Yeah," she sighed. "I think we should. You haven't seen them yet since you got here."

"Yeah," I agreed. "We should get ready."

I was first in the shower. Mallory sat by the tree when I went in and was still there when I got out. She was staring at the bracelet.

"Hey," I walked up to her. "You going in now?"

"Yeah," she answered, snapping out of her thoughts. "Yeah, I'm going to get ready now." She stood up and kissed me softly on the lips. "I love you."

"I love you, too," I said back and then she was gone.

After her shower, we were out walking and holding hands. It was the happiest I've ever remembered being on Christmas and much happier than I expected without my parents. In the corner of my eye, I spotted a familiar train in the station.

No, it _can't_ be.

Out walked people I could recite their names and faces. Then one I never expected to see again.

Marlena.

And she was heavily pregnant.

**A/N: Oh no! What will happen when Jacob and Marlena come face-to-face again? What about Mallory? Find out soon…**


	19. Another type of reunion

"Jacob?"

I snapped my free hand in front of my boyfriend's face, waving my palm when the snap was done. Jacob shook out of his thoughts and turned to face me.

"You ok?" I asked, wondering where the hell his mind just went.

"Yeah," he assured me. "Yeah, I'm fine. Just saw something familiar."

"Oh," I said, my eyes trailing to where his eyes were just seconds ago. I could see a lot of people walking off of a train, but there was a blonde woman walking away from that direction. Was he looking at her?

Jacob's face looked back, like he was trying to hide what he was looking at from me. It must have been her so I turned my head back to him.

"Do you know those people?" I pointed in the general spot he was staring at.

"They're part of where I was when I left," he answered. "Remember that circus I told you about? That's them."

"Do you want to say hi or something?" I questioned him. Jacob paused for a second like he was scared to go up to them.

"No, no," he finally replied, "I don't want to get in their way. I remember how crazy things seemed when we stopped at places."

"Come on," I started pulling on his hand. "I don't think you'll be bothering them. Shit, I think they might even be happy to see you, Jacob."

"But Lois and Doug…"

"Can wait," I finished.

Jacob sighed, hesitant. "Fine. I just got to find some people first. I wasn't exactly the most popular guy since I was the new guy."

"I bet they were jealous," I smiled and looked back at Jacob as we got closer. His face had an expression I'd never seen on him before – it looked a lot like fear.

He spotted two guys talking and began to slow down. One was short, dark-haired and holding a dog. The other was older and seemed to have trouble standing on his legs as if they were in pain.

"Walter, Camel," Jacob smiled as we approached them. The dog ran up to him and jumped on his leg. "Hey Queenie."

"Jacob Jankowski," the older one said with a huge smile on his face. "Well, well. We thought we saw the last of you when you left."

"No," he smiled back but still holding back. "I guess not."

"What're you doing back here?" the other one said, watching the dog play with Jacob.

"I kind of live here now," Jacob answered. "Well, I live in part-time in Baton Rouge for my job. But I've been living here the past few months."

The two men looked at me. "And who is this?" the older one spoke again.

"Oh, sorry," Jacob smiled. "Mallory, this is Walter and Camel. Guys, this is my girlfriend, Mallory."

"Hi," I smiled.

"Walter," the shorter one said, holding out his hand. I shook it. "Nice to meet you. And that is my dog, Queenie. Jacob's helped her out a few times."

"That's really nice," I said. It was weird to meet these people that had seen another side of Jacob and also the vet said of him.

"I'm Camel," the older one coughed, holding out his hand, too. "It's nice Jacob found such a pretty girl."

"Thank you," I replied. They really were sweet guys, though.

"How did you guys meet?" Walter asked Jacob. He looked like he didn't want to answer so I stepped in.

"We met at a strip club," I confirmed. The two men exchanged a look. "It's not a big deal. I'm a stripper and Jacob came in one day looking for a beer. Then we got to talking and he left with you guys. But he came back a few months ago."

They stayed quiet at first then Walter half-howled. "_Damn_! Jacob really did find the perfect woman! Who would have thought a guy like him, how he was when we met him, would find someone like you?"

"How was he when you met him?" I asked, curious.

"Oh, God," Walter laughed. "He was such a prude! Had no experience with women whatsoever. He even screwed up a chance with the woman traveling with us – Barbara."

I started giggling. Jacob looked over at me. He was embarrassed at first but after he saw the look on my face, he smiled. "Okay, so what? I wasn't exactly great at talking to women."

"Haha," Camel laughed. "'Great' isn't the word I would use."

The two men were laughing together and it caused me to laugh a little bit, too. "It's a good thing you got me, huh?" I asked, looking at Jacob.

"Definitely," he nodded. "You wouldn't believe how amazing this girl is and not just from the way you fantasize her profession."

"Hey," Walter jokingly scolded, "You have no idea how I fantasize strippers."

"I think I do," Jacob laughed. "Remember the books underneath your bed?"

Camel started laughing harder, holding back coughs. "That's no fair, man," Walter said back.

Out of the corner of my eye, I spotted the blonde from earlier looking at us. The look in her eyes made it seem like she thought she was missing out on something but it was for the better. Who was she?

"Hey, Jacob," I tugged on his hand to get his attention. "Maybe we should call Lois and Doug, tell them you have some friends in town." I turned my head to Walter and Camel. "How long are you guys here?"

"About a week," Camel sighed.

"See?" I turned back to Jacob. "You have to leave soon to go back to work. You should catch up."

"What about you?" Jacob asked with a sad look in his eyes.

"I'll go meet them," I said. I was actually considering going up to that blonde when he was gone, find out why she was looking at my boyfriend. Especially when she looked about 9 months pregnant.

"Okay," Jacob shrugged. "I guess I can do that as long as I'm not leaving you alone."

"You're not," I shook my head. "I've got things to do here. This is my town, remember?"

"Yeah," he smiled. Jacob leaned down and gave me a soft kiss, causing the other guys to do a soundless hoot. I think I'm gonna like these guys. "Come on."

His hand let go of mine and the three of them walked away. I turned my head back in the direction of the blonde. She was turning her head as if she had just been watching us. What the fuck is her problem?

I wasn't going to yell at a pregnant woman, in public, on a crowded street. I wasn't that stupid but something about her was bothering me. I walked out of the circus crowd and pulled out my cell phone.

It only rang twice.

"Mallory?" Doug answered. "Where are you guys?"

"I don't think we're gonna make it," I sighed.

"What happened?"

"Nothing," I assured him. "Some of Jacob's friends are in town, from the circus he was with before he came back. So he's gonna go catch up with them because they're not here too long."

"Really?" I couldn't put a word on what his voice sounded like but it definitely wasn't happy he met up with some friends. "Like who?"

Doug know Jacob's friends or something? "Um, Walter and Camel."

I heard a almost-silent sigh of relief. What did he know? "That's nice." I wasn't going to press him on this yet.

"You'll tell Lois, right?"

"Yeah, yeah," he answered. "Merry Christmas, Mallory."

"Merry Christmas, too, Doug," I smiled as I shut my phone. I turned around and bumped right into someone. "Shit. I'm sorry."

It was that blonde. "No, actually, I'm sorry," she said in a perfect voice.

"No," I said, "I'm sorry. I can't believe I just bumped into a pregnant woman." She started laughing. "Well, you are pregnant, right?"

"Yes, I am," she said, still laughing. "You don't have to worry, though. I don't think bumping into someone is going to do anything to the baby at this point."

"That's good to know," I replied. I decided to ask her who she is. "Did I see you before? I thought you might have been looking at me or something."

"Oh, no," she responded. "Actually, I was looking at Jacob. I hadn't seen him in a while so I thought my eyes were playing tricks on me."

"Oh," I tilted my head a bit. "You know Jacob?"

"Yeah," she smiled. "He was the one who took care of one of my horses. There just wasn't anything he could do to help him."

"Oh! I'm so sorry," I blurted.

"It's okay," her face saddened. "It was a long-time coming, I guess. I just didn't know about it until Jacob joined our little group. I'm Marlena, by the way."

She held out her hand for me to shake. "Mallory."

Marlena gave a look that showed something clicked in her mind. I didn't understand it but I let it go.

"Nice to meet you, Mallory," she smiled. "Jacob looks pretty happy when he's around you. I don't think I ever saw him the way he was with you the whole time he was with us." It seemed like there was something more to the 'us'.

"Nice to meet you, too," I smiled back. "I'm just happy I gave him another chance. After Jacob left with you guys, I thought I was never gonna see him again. And I guess I really liked him after that first night, too."

Marlena swallowed hard. "What convinced you to forgive him?"

"I don't know," I shrugged, surprised I was being so open with people I didn't even know existed an hour ago. "He has this thing about him, you know? He kind of charms you, he's sexy as fuck and I don't know."

"Yeah, I'm aware of 'that thing'," she chuckled. "You should have seen the girls that went after him."

"Barbara?"

"You heard?"

"Yep," I laughed. "I also heard he screwed it up."

"Jacob was drunk from what I heard of that night," Marlena chuckled again. "Then Walter and the girls dressed him up in a dress and put some clown make-up on him."

I burst out giggling. "Jacob in a dress?" I had to hold my hand over my mouth so I didn't get too loud. "I can't exactly imagine that one."

"You had to be there," Marlena smiled, an awe in her eyes. Huh? "He slept in a trunk after he passed out and Walter and his friends put the trunk in the dining area. When Jacob woke up, everyone saw it."

"Oh, wow," I calmed down a little bit. "It sounds pretty fun to be on the train with you guys."

"It is, sometimes," she sighed.

"Do you wanna come to my place?" I asked her, almost forward. "I mean, it's gotta be uncomfortable standing here and I would love to hear more stories."

"Oh, okay," she hesitantly answered. "Sure, let's go."

We walked the little bit we were from my house and went in.

"You can say my house is shit," I smiled, glancing behind me at Marlena as I opened the door. "I know it is."

"I don't really feel right saying that," she shrugged sheepishly. "But I guess it is."

We both laughed. "You want something to drink?"

"Iced tea?"

"I actually do have that," I chuckled. "You can sit somewhere, get as comfortable as you can."

She looked around the room and walked over to the couch. I walked into the kitchen and I saw her look at a picture of me and Jacob that was on the table. "Are you guys serious?" she shouted to me.

"I guess," I answered, putting her tea into a glass and getting another for me. "We only started dating maybe, three months ago? But he was living here with me for a while until he got the job out of town."

"What job?" she asked as I walked in the room with the two drinks. "Thank you."

I smiled my 'you're welcome' and sat beside her. "He got a vet job over in Baton Rouge a couple of weeks ago. This week was his first gone."

"That's good for him," she smiled and taking a sip. "I always knew he would help animals. The new vet we have is not nearly as good as him."

"I bet," I smiled. It was easy talking to Marlena. I don't know what my earlier fears were about but she seemed pretty nice. "So, do you know the sex yet?"

She looked at me confused at first. "Oh! No," she answered. "Me and my husband are keeping it a surprise."

"Oh, you're married?" I asked, happy it confirmed nothing had happened between the two of them. She nodded. "That's nice."

"We're very excited," she nodded again. "It's our first baby."

"Wow," I smiled. "That is exciting. You have any names planned?"

"Not really," she put her head down then brought it back up. "We're playing it by ear. I can't wait to get back to my act, though. Then the baby can watch when he or she is old enough. It's amazing to bring a baby up in an environment like mine. That kid is going to be spoiled."

I chuckled, envious of the unborn child. I wish I had a family like her and her husband. The hours seemed to pass quick and before I knew it, it was 6:00 p.m.

The door opened. "Hey, baby," Jacob said, his voice higher. "You here?"

"In here," I answered. His face had looked like he'd seen a ghost when he walked in and saw Marlena sitting with me on the couch. "You know Marlena, right?"

"Yeah, what – what, what are you doing here?" He asked her, stunned.

"Me and Mallory almost knocked each other over today," she said. "We got to talking and found out we had you in common. I've been sharing stories about you and so has she."

We both chuckled, but Jacob's eyes stayed glue to her face. "Oh." What was going on with him? I wish I could read his mind or something.

"You wanna stay for dinner?" I turned to Marlena, snapping Jacob out of whatever trance he was in.

"I shouldn't," she replied as she tried to get up.

"Stay," I said again. "It'd probably be nice for you to catch up, right?"

"Yeah, sure," Jacob half-mumbled.

We each got up and I was about to dial for a pizza when Marlena screamed out in pain. Jacob rushed to her side before I could and I was closer.

"What's wrong?" he asked her.

"I think my water may have just have broken," she whispered, her voice breaking in pain. I looked to the floor underneath her and sure enough, it was wet.

**A/N: So Mallory and Marlena have become friends and Jacob has yet to speak to her alone. Uh-oh. What could it all mean with the baby coming? And will her husband make an appearance? All in the next chapter.**


	20. Confessions and truths

**A/N: Okay so this is officially my new longest chapter I have ever written. I know they may not seem too long but this one is the most I've written for a chapter. **

**Get ready for some drama and angst! (Maybe some tissues?)**

I tapped my foot about a million times since we arrived here ten hours ago. Jacob was just as jittery as I was, maybe even more. I wondered why and I also wondered what had happened when he called Marlena's husband.

"_I think my water may have broken," Marlena said as I looked down at my floor. I had no idea what to do when somebody's water broke. I wasn't a doctor or some shit like that. _

"_What do we do?" It was Jacob who asked the questions I didn't even think of._

"_Jacob," Marlena gasped. "You need to call him, tell him what's going on."_

"_Who?" I asked. It was as if they were speaking in codes I didn't understand. I didn't have a clue if they meant the father, her doctor, whoever. _

"_Where is he?" Jacob asked. _

"_He's at a meeting a few towns over," Marlena winced again, the pain obvious. "He was supposed to come tomorrow."_

_Jacob grabbed his cell phone out of his pocket but hesitated. "Does he still have the same number?" Marlena nodded and he began dialing as he walked in my bedroom._

_I looked at Marlena, holding herself up off the floor but not quite sitting. That couldn't be comfortable, especially for someone so close to labor. "Is there anything I can do?"_

"_Um," she paused. "Do you have a car? Do you think you can drive me to the hospital? Ambulances take longer than just driving yourself in this situation." _

"_Sure," I nodded, scared I was going to break her if I moved her a bit. I was definitely not the person you wanted to go through this with. _

_Jacob walked back into the room. I didn't recognize the look on his face but it wasn't a good thing. He must not be on good terms with whoever he had to call._

"_What'd he say?" Marlena asked while I helped her stand up. Jacob rushed to her other side and put her arm around his shoulder._

"_He's coming," he dully answered. "He's not sure how long. They won't let actually leave but they let him answer his phone." There was a pause and a thoughtful type of look on his face. "He was definitely surprised I was calling him. It almost made him not answer his phone."_

_We moved slowly to the door and I reached out and turned the knob. Jacob was carrying Marlena at his side on his own now and I couldn't help but feel a small pang of jealously. I wanted to be the one close to him. Then I wondered even more what would happen if I was ever pregnant. Would he take care of me, too?_

_Of course he would. Jacob loved me. He was helping out a friend right now so obviously he would help someone he was in love with at some point. I'd hope he cared whoever's child it was, even though I didn't intend on finding someone else at any near time._

_Jacob got Marlena to the car and opened the door for her. He ran to the driver's side as I helped her get in the seat. Once she was in, I climbed in the backseat. I looked between the two of them and wondered what some other stories could be of theirs. It was obvious I was missing something important. _

My mind flashed back to the current hour as I watched Jacob more closely. He was sitting as patient as ever. But also in other ways, he was impatient. I could see he was nervous from the way his fingers moved. To say they were twisting an invisible ring on his fingers was the best way to explain it.

Every few minutes, he sighed a deep sigh. I had no idea what made him like this. In all these months we'd been together, I'd never seen him like this. To the outsider, it might look normal, just two people in a hospital waiting room waiting for their friend to deliver a baby.

But to me, someone who thought she knew the man beside her pretty well, that was not just the case.

"Do you want some coffee?" Jacob asked me. I turned my head back to him and out of my thoughts. He was staring right at me.

"Sure," I smiled. He got up and held out his hand for me. I took it and stood up. We walked to the elevator and I was happy to see it was empty. "Did you know she was pregnant the last time you saw her?"

Something about my question must have surprised Jacob but he composed himself fast. "No," he answered. "I had no idea. Seeing her again was one of the last things I expected." He chuckled a bit then added, "Especially to come home to."

I smiled with him. "Yeah," I looked up at him. He was so much taller than me. How did I not notice that before? "Sorry about that. It was an accident."

"Nah, it's fine," he made an expression that caused me to believe him.

"So you know Marlena's husband?"

"Yep," he popped the 'p' at the end.

"That good, huh?" I laughed which caused him to but then he turned serious.

"It's not really my business, I guess," he shrugged, stroking my fingers on the hand he still held. "I didn't even know him that well but he wasn't exactly the type of person you wanted to get on a bad side of."

"Oh," I swallowed. That can't be a good thing. I was glad Marlena had people like Jacob, Walter and Camel around at the time but I didn't know the extent of how bad it was. For all I knew, it was all an act and Jacob never saw her husband's real side.

"Yeah," he sighed.

"Did she try to leave him?" He swallowed hard this time and I instantly wanted to take my question back. "I'm sorry. None of my business. Sorry."

"No," he assured me. "It's fine. It's just – he's not exactly my favorite subject."

"Ok," I breathed. "Well, what was his name?"

The elevator dinged and we got off. I felt like my question would stay unanswered. It seemed also like it should since I had stuck my foot in my stupid mouth already.

Jacob ordered us two coffees and got me a funnel cake. We sat down and I started putting sugar in my cup when he spoke up. "His name's August. He's the second runner of the circus, after Al."

I took it in. Maybe Marlena was worried about her job if she left him. "Did he ever threaten her?"

Another deep breath. "Yes."

I nodded, as if I could ever understand something like that. Her staying with someone like that.

"Why didn't she leave, then?"

As soon as the words left my mouth, I felt like I stuck the other foot in. I waited for a reply calmly.

"She loved her," Jacob said as if it's the simplest thing in the world. "Why else stay with someone like that? She always thought she could change him. Maybe she did."

"But she seemed so happy," I said, looking down at my funnel cake. I started to break off pieces and licked the powder off my fingers.

"Maybe she is," he shrugged again. "I don't know how their marriage is now. I only know what I saw all those months ago. Maybe she got pregnant and he changed himself for the good of his child."

Something about the way he said that made me think Jacob doubted what he was saying. I didn't want to say anything more or start up anything else. Instead, we finished our coffee and went back up to that waiting room we'd spent the last ten hours in.

Jacob reached out for my hand when we walked again. He was so quiet and I internally kicked myself for asking so many nosy questions.

About a half hour later, a doctor came out. It looked like Marlena's doctor and as he got closer, I was sure it was him. Jacob and I stood up, facing directly at the man as he came closer.

"It's a boy," he smiled. "Your friend is sleeping right now. The baby's been taken to the maternity ward." Jacob breathed a huge sigh of relief and I did the same. I was glad everything was all right, even if I didn't know her that well.

"Thank you," Jacob said, holding out his hand. He was a gentlemen to the fault. The doctor shook his hand.

"That's such good news!" I exclaimed when the doctor was gone. I reached up and hugged Jacob. His arms reached around to my back, rubbing it. "I can't wait to see the baby!"

"We may have to wait a bit," he chuckled, pulling apart from me. "Do we even know if the mother's seen the baby yet?"

"Wouldn't she see it when the baby was born?"

"Probably," he replied thoughtfully. His mind must be elsewhere.

"Are you worried about August coming?" I whispered, sensing I was right because he became rigid when I said his name.

"That's part of it," he admitted. "But I don't know what's going on between them right now. It could be good. But if he's the same, it doesn't seem like it'd be a great living situation for a baby."

"What's the other part?"

"I'm not sure," he confessed. "I feel like there's something I'm missing but I don't know what it is."

"Well, whatever it is," I smiled up at him and squeezed his hand. "It'll work out."

I reached my arms up again and hugged him close. His arms came around again and he pushed me even closer to his body. I could feel my friend trying to poke at me and it made me giggle.

"What?"

"I think someone's a little excited," I giggled and he pulled away. His face was now covered in red embarrassment.

"Shit," he whispered.

"No, don't be embarrassed," I said to him. "It's nice to know I can do that to you even it's not a sexual thing or some shit. It's nice to feel wanted."

"You're always wanted," Jacob looked in my eyes as he said it. "What do you say we go home and wait until we hear more?"

"That sounds nice," I nodded. "Maybe we can take care of my buddy down there." I giggled a bit again at the end and he chuckled.

We drove home in silence, Jacob's hand holding mine in the middle of the car. I watched the way my hand fit around his and smiled. I never thought I'd get something like this, so early especially. And I definitely didn't think there was someone like Jacob out there for me.

It made me smile even more.

Jacob looked over at me with a curious look on his face as we pulled in front of my house. "What's that smile?"

"Nothing," I tried to shake it off. "I just love you."

"I love you, too," he said, leaning over to kiss me then our twined hands. He opened his door and got out, opening my door as he reached the other side. I stepped out of the car and grabbed his hand, smiling.

His hands roamed my back as I tried to open the door. It was 5 a.m. so I didn't think there were many people watching us. It made me more confident to know the sun wasn't even out yet. His hands roamed to the front and I felt them squeeze my breasts lightly. I moaned, wanting the door open already.

But he was making me nervous. And horny. I felt the same buddy poking me again, as if it were asking for attention. I turned around and grabbed Jacob by the neck. The kiss was passionate, open, and a complete turn-on.

Missing him all those days made me want him even if I just had him twenty-four hours ago.

My hands turned the knob from behind me and the door opened. We fell into a tangle of limbs without hitting the ground. I couldn't stop kissing him. He seemed to be thinking the same thought.

He had my shirt off quick as I worked on his buttons. I didn't know what it was that made us want each other so much in that moment. But I wanted him so much and it was obvious he wanted me too.

We finally made our way to the bedroom and we were on the bed, me on bottom when his cell phone ringed. He pulled off me to see what my thoughts were. "Go answer it," I said. He gave me a quick kiss before he left the room in his boxers to answer his phone.

"Hello?" I heard him say to whoever it was. I looked around the room as I sat there on the bed in my bra and panties. I felt strangely cold sitting there without Jacob. I got up and pulled my jeans back on, knowing the moment was gone when I saw Jacob's face.

He hung up and turned back to me. "That was Marlena," he said in an almost robotic voice then changed it. "She's awake and wanted to see me."

"Oh," I said, surprised. "Just you?"

He swallowed. "I don't know. You can come."

"Does she even want me to?"

"Probably," he answered, walking closer to me. "It's just she got me on the phone and said I could come see the baby."

"She wanted you to meet the baby?" I asked, my heart breaking a little bit. Why did she want my boyfriend to come see her and husband's baby, and not me, either?

"Maybe because we're friends," he replied. "Come with me."

"I don't know," I said, picking up my shirt. That obviously wasn't going to happen anymore.

"Please," he said as he was even closer. Jacob hooked his fingers in my belt loops and played with them. "I won't go unless you come."

He began kissing my neck in a too-persuasive way. "Fine," I moaned.

Jacob smiled, triumphant and grabbed his clothes. He put them on fast and we left as he reached for my hand again.

Once we were there, he went in the room first. The fourth down the hall. I waited in that same waiting room and got bored. I began to walk down the hallway after a few minutes. Slowing down when I came close to the room.

"So what are you saying?" Jacob half-whispered. I wondered if I was eavesdropping on something I shouldn't hear. Probably about her husband.

"The baby," Marlena's voice trailed. ""It's yours."

I couldn't breathe. I felt my legs give out and my lungs felt numb, like there was no way to get air in them anymore. The baby was _Jacob's_? My Jacob's? How was that possible? Less than a day ago, Marlena was telling me how her and her husband had felt, how they were excited.

I pinched my eyes shut and tried to ignore the pricking that was coming through them. I was not going to cry. For all I knew, they meant something else. That was it. They meant something else. I backed away from the room, slowly. I didn't want to hear anymore.

My eyes became wet anyway and I sat down in the isolated hallway. There wasn't many people going through it and I was thankful. The last thing I wanted was for someone to pass me and think I needed to be admitted here.

Jacob slept with Marlena. Jacob slept with a married woman. I thought back to what he told me earlier about her husband. _He's not exactly my favorite subject_, he told me. It all was starting to make some sense now. Why he was so protective of her, why he was hesitant to make that phone call.

Did her husband know? No, he couldn't have. He threatened his own wife before. If he had known Jacob was sleeping with his wife, he would have threatened him, too. Maybe even tried to kill him. I couldn't think of that. I wouldn't.

_But he wasn't exactly the type of person you wanted to get on a bad side of_, Jacob had also said to me. That part confirmed that part – August didn't know about their affair. And he was going to be here tomorrow. My throat felt like it was closing up. What would he do to Marlena when he found out?

What would he do to Jacob?

I didn't want my thoughts follow down that road. Instead, I kept thinking of the way Marlena was looking at Jacob when she saw us together outside. She had seen us act like a couple, happy, holding hands and even kissing. Was she jealous? Is that why she looked?

I heard footsteps step into the area of the hall I was sitting in. I couldn't bring myself to look up. I knew whose footsteps they were.

"Mallory," Jacob rushed to me and sat down. "What's wrong? Are you okay?" His thumb came to my cheek and I flinched away. I finally looked at his face and saw he felt rejected.

"We need to talk," I sniffled.

"Yeah," he nodded. "We do."

"Can you take me home?" He nodded again as I stood up on my own. Whenever he tried to touch me, I flinched away from him. He knew something was wrong. Was he putting it together than I heard what they were talking about? Maybe he had since he didn't ask me why I wanted to leave so quick when I wanted to go in the first place.

I was quiet the way home, aside from the sniffling leftover from my crying. I wiped my eyes a few times while Jacob looked at me helplessly.

He knew I knew.

We walked in still in silence, so different from an hour ago.

"Is it true?" I asked him as soon as we were inside, turning around to face him. I wiped another tear.

"Yes," he said, bowing his head down.

"You _slept _with her?" I half-screamed. "You slept with her!"

"It's not what you think," Jacob tried to explain, walking closer to me.

"Oh, it's not?" I sarcastically asked. "So you didn't _have sex_ with a _fucking_ married woman and create a baby? Am I missing something here?"

"No," he whispered. "No, you're not."

"Good," I nodded. "At least I'm all caught up now. Were you ever going to tell me?"

"I was," he answered. I gave him a look that meant I doubted him. "Honest, I was. But how do you explain to the girl you're in love with that you had an affair with a married woman?"

"Oh, I don't know," I moved my arms in defeat, rising them and letting them fall. "You don't wait for them to show in town, fucking pregnant and then tell me!"

The tears began to spill down my cheeks again. My face felt hot and I didn't want to look at Jacob.

"I didn't know what to say, okay?" His voice grew louder. "And I sure as hell didn't expect her to be pregnant!"

"What did you expect?"

"I don't know," he felt defeated too. I looked up at his face finally, and saw his eyes were red. "I just know I don't want to lose you."

"Too bad," I spat.

"Mal," he pleaded. "I didn't know she was pregnant. Honest. You can't be mad at me for not knowing it was my baby."

"I can be mad at you for not telling me!" I screamed back. "You knew you slept with her, right?" He nodded his head shamefully. Too bad, I thought this time. "You knew when you saw her, you knew there was the possibility it was your baby. Am I right?"

"Yes," he whispered. He seemed like a little kid in this moment. Like someone had kicked him or some shit. I didn't care. I couldn't feel a thing but my heart burning.

"Then you should said something!" I yelled another time. "You let me think I was the only person you were ever with that way. And now I find out _you were having fucking sex with a married woman_ and knocked her up? What the fuck am I supposed to do with that?"

"I don't know," he said in defeat once again. "I just know I love you. I can't lose you, okay?"

"You just did," I said, the tears spilling over.

"You love me," he tried pleading again. "I know you do. You can't just turn it off because I kept something from you."

"You're right," I answered, bowing my head then bringing it back up. "But I can be mad. I am mad. You didn't tell me something huge and now something huger exists. You are a father to another woman's child!"

"I know, I know," he sighed. "I made mistakes. Big ones. But it doesn't change what we have." Jacob walked closer to me and tried to put his hands on my shoulders.

"Don't touch me," I whispered. His eyes let out tears when he heard me say that. "It doesn't change it. But I can't do this. It hurts too much. You're a dad now. Someone else's child is your son. I need time."

"Okay," Jacob backed away from me. "I'll give you time." He walked slowly to the door as if he was afraid this was the time he'd see me. "I have to leave for work soon so take your time. At least you won't have me in the same town while you think."

I nodded. "Just please leave."

He nodded back. "Bye, Mallory. I love you. Remember that, please?" Another nod from me and he was out the door.

I walked over to my bed and cried my eyes out more than I ever had in my whole fucking life. Nothing hurt me more than watching the only guy I'd ever loved leave or finding out he has a child with someone else.


	21. The Guilt Trip

**A/N: This chapter is for the ones still with me. I really hope no one hates me for the paternity thing or certain other things I put into the last chapter. Trust me, I have this all planned so I know what I'm doing **

The day had started out so perfectly. Having that first Christmas without my parents was something I had been dreading. Any holiday, really, wasn't high on my list of days I wanted. But getting through that first one with Mallory was making it so much more than I had ever expected.

I loved seeing her face light up when she got her presents. I didn't know how she was going to react but I wanted her to get those gifts anyway. The shirt was supposed to balance out the jewelry, even if the shirt took a lot of searching to find. But seeing how much she loved that shirt was worth any price.

I don't even know how to explain my thoughts when I saw Marlena sitting on Mallory's couch. I was stunned, to say the least. There was no way me or anyone else would have expected to come home to see her sitting there.

She didn't mention her husband much and that caused me to worry. Were they still together? Did he know about us despite what Marlena had told me months ago? She said he was at a meeting but that meant little to me. If I knew anything about her husband, it was how much his anger and jealousy got the best of him.

I was so impatient sitting in those hospital chairs. But looking over at Mallory every few seconds calmed me down a little bit. It was almost as if she was there for me even though she wasn't. Not really. She was there for Marlena and it made me even more uneasy as I figured the dates together of when we were together to when she was having a baby.

It didn't seem to add up at first. I couldn't figure it out but I let it pass. If it was my baby, if she was done with her husband, then she would have told me. She wouldn't have kept it a secret and became friends with my girlfriend, lying to her.

My mind didn't connect much when I got the phone call to go down and see the baby at the hospital. Mallory was sad because she thought they were friends already. How could I say "Stay home" to her?

I walked into that room with my head held high, thinking nothing was wrong with what was happening. Marlena looked up at me when I entered the room. "Hey," I said as I saw her face expression. "What's wrong? Where's the baby?"

"He's fine," she sniffled. I didn't know what could possibly be wrong if the baby was fine. "Jacob, I need to tell you something."

"Is he coming?"

It was the first question to cross my mind, especially one that could scare her and make her cry. I had seen that side of her many times.

"Yes," Marlena nodded, as she wiped a tear from her cheek. "He is, but that's not what I wanted to talk to you about."

"Okay," I nodded this time. "But Mallory's waiting for me, so -"

"She's here?" her face was surprised.

"Yeah," I half-chuckled. "I thought maybe she'd come with me to see the baby. Where is he?"

"He's with all the other babies, of course," she smiled. "He's beautiful, Jacob. Looks just like his father."

She was staring me right in the eye. I sat down, trying to process the way she had said that. "Um…I don't know. I don't know what you -"

"I think you know what I mean," she stared still, never breaking the glance until I looked away.

"So what are you saying?" I asked, wondering if she was going to give me an honest answer sometime.

"The baby," she started, causing an uneasy feeling in my stomach. "It's yours."

I felt as if someone kicked me in the gut. I always promised myself if I was ever going to have a baby with someone, I would be there for them. I would do it the right way and marry them if we weren't married already. But this was Marlena, not the girl I was in love with and she was already married.

It felt weird hearing her say that. I had no idea what I was supposed to do at this point. "How – how do you know that?"

"We didn't do anything like that until at least a month after you left," Marlena whispered in a small voice. "The baby being born now confirms it. I guess that's why it was so easy to convince him that this child is his."

"Could he tell?" I swallowed, not wanting my words to get out.

"He has the exact same hair as you do," she began, playing with the blanket on the bed, twisting it into knots. "I think he'll be able to tell something. He knew we were close. It won't be that hard to put the pieces together."

Marlena sniffled again.

"Do you need anything?" I asked, genuinely concerned. "Is there anything I can do? I know I wasn't here for the whole pregnancy part but I will help take care of this baby, if you let me."

She smiled a small smile at me. "I know you would. But I can't ask you to do that. You have a life here, Jacob. What am I going to do? Ask you to give it up so you can take care of your illegitimate son?"

"It wouldn't be like that," I shook my head. My thoughts began to wander on the girl down the hall in the waiting room. I couldn't just give her up and definitely not without explaining everything. I couldn't bear to hurt her with that or by leaving.

"Yes, it would," she forced another smile. I knew it was fake when I looked into her wet eyes. "And I would never ask that of you."

"But the baby -"

"Will be fine," she nodded.

"If he finds out, if he knows," I started. "Then the baby will know about me. You'll tell him about his real father, right?"

"Of course," she said. I stood up from the chair after touching her hand. "Hey, Jacob?" I turned around and looked at her tear-streaked face. "I really did love you, you know that?"

"I know," I nodded. "I really did love you, too."

Just as I started to turn around, she called out again. "Jacob?" I looked at her again, waiting for whatever she had to say. "His name's Simon."

"Simon," I whispered with a small smile on my face. My first born child was named Simon. I may never get to know him well but at this point, I didn't know the future either. I officially left that time and stopped in my tracks when I saw Mallory, crying and sitting on the floor a little bit down from the room.

Her face told me she heard us talking. She was so excited about coming here and meeting Marlena, the whole baby idea. But this was not the face of the girl who walked back in here tonight.

This girl had turned into a young woman who was heartbroken.

Mallory let me take her home. I watched as she cried in the car. It wasn't as obvious as it had been when she was alone in that hallway. She was trying to keep them inside when she was with me. I knew that much just by looking at her.

It felt as if all my fears had came true when I saw her sitting in the hospital hallway tonight.

She asked me if it was true. There was nothing I could but tell her the truth. I didn't want to do this right now and definitely not this way. There was supposed to be the right time to tell her about me and Marlena and the affair. Somehow, after my child with another woman had just been born didn't seem like the right time.

I should've told her sooner.

Mallory asked me all these questions about Marlena and me. When she told me I lost her, it felt as if someone tore out my heart, set it on fire, sewed it up again and cut it up into little pieces. It never felt like this before.

She confirmed my thought on how I should have told her. I knew that but actually hearing her say the words _"I can be mad at you for not telling me!"_ made it even worse. The pain was transparent in her voice. The tears were coming hard again. I felt my own eyes begin to tear as I thought of gaining this child caused me to lose her.

"You knew when you saw her, you knew there was the possibility it was your baby. Am I right?" She asked me, the pain overwhelming us both,

"Yes," I kept my voice low. I didn't know what else to say. She discovered the thing I was most ashamed of doing. Not just that I'd slept with a married woman. That was second to the idea I'd kept something from her.

"Then you should said something!" she yelled at me. I could only let her yell and get it out. "You let me think I was the only person you were ever with that way. And now I find out you were having fucking sex with a married woman and knocked her up? What the fuck am I supposed to do with that?"

I didn't know so I admitted it. "I don't know. I just know I love you. I can't lose you, okay?"

Mallory looked at me like she wanted me to leave already. "You just did."

I was in denial. I couldn't lose her. She was the best thing to ever happen to me and all I was sure about was how much I loved her and wanted to be with her.

I tried to persuade her to rethink her decision. But her anger didn't calm even if she did say how she still loves me. At least my deceit hadn't erased her feelings for me.

She told me not to touch her when all I wanted to do was comfort her. I hid my own pain at hearing those words and gave her what she wanted. There was nothing I wouldn't have given her right now.

It was more than obvious she was ready to cry when I turned to leave. I took one last look at her and registered how beautiful she is. I didn't know what caused me to fuck up so badly with her but I had an idea in the back of my mind.

Because you didn't want her to be disgusted by you, the other half of my brain was telling me.

And it was right. I didn't want that. I wanted her to know the me I was when I saw her again, not the guy who slept with someone who was married. It didn't matter it was a bad marriage. I had no right to intrude on it and I did anyways.

Who was I kidding? I was disgusted even in myself.

I got into my car when I left and drove straight to my home in Baton Rouge. I didn't have to leave for a few more hours but I didn't care. I couldn't stay in New Orleans and know what I did to Mallory. I'd do what I said I would – give her space. As much as it still didn't feel right calling Baton Rouge or my apartment home yet, calling where Mallory is home seemed like the real estate of today.

I could be kicked out of that home.

Instead, I drove as fast as I could without going over speed limits. Getting stopped by cops was the last thing I needed.

Finally reaching the parking lot, my phone rang. My heart began to pick up as I imagined it was from Mallory. It wasn't, though. It was Doug. Shit, I thought.

"Doug?" I answered as I grabbed my stuff out of the car. I was glad I had them in there already.

"What did you do?" His voice steamed with venom as he asked me those four words.

"You talked to Mallory, I guess?"

"No," he sighed, not seeming to calm much. "She called Lois to come over. Lois said she sounded like she was crying. Then I try to find you and suddenly, you're out of town. So I'm asking you again. _What did you do_?"

I sighed. "Remember how I told you I had a relationship with a married woman?" I could sense him nodding so I continued. "She came back into town."

"Shit," Doug whispered. "So Mallory knows about what you did? Did you at least tell her before she found out herself?"

"No," I shook my head. I heard him sigh and not in a good, relief kind of way. "She heard us talking. There's more."

"What else could there be?"

"Apparently," I took a deep breath. "I'm a father now."

"Fuck," Doug whispered. "Do you have any idea how much you've screwed everything up? She trusted you. I trusted you. I trusted you would tell her about this just like you came to me. You can't be a wuss about things, you know that? If she really loved you, she would have accepted that you slept with someone married."

"I know that now," I sighed. I walked up to my apartment and shut the door. "I know she loves me and I know she would have accepted it. I do now, at least. It was more my stupid side telling me to shut up."

"Well your stupid side is a dick," he spat. "You should have told her. You shouldn't have out this on me if you weren't planning on telling her."

"I was planning on -"

"No," he cut me off. "She is probably crying right now, thanks to you. I know that girl pretty damn well and she does not cry easily. Her being like this right now must be killing her. I hope you know how much you fucked up here."

"I do know."

"Good," he said back and hung up.

"Fuck!" I screamed, slamming my hand against the wall. It didn't cause a hole but my hand started to bleed at the knuckles. I looked at the red seeping out of my skin and just left it. What did it matter? I hurt Mallory more than I'd ever wanted to and I probably lost her for good.

A stupid bloody hand didn't matter to me as much as she did.

I jumped in the shower to scrub the horrible parts of the day off of me, keeping before I saw Marlena walk off that train. Remembering how happy me and Mallory were when the day started and exchanging gifts.

After the shower, I went to sleep. A tear slid down my cheek as I thought it might have been the last time I'd seen the girl I love more than anything.

The next morning, I went right to work and put on a happy face. You didn't come work with animals and look disgusted at yourself.

There was a lot of kids coming in with their parents today. It reminded me of Simon. What kind of pet would he have? Would he have one? I pushed those thoughts aside as I tried to focus on my job.

The days passed slower than usual. Each time I came home, I expected either a voice mail or a text from Mallory. And each time, I let myself get disappointed when I realized it wasn't coming. I deserved worse than the disappointment.

When I was alone, I did everything routinely. It didn't feel real and like I was living a ghost life. It probably wasn't anything compared to whatever Mallory was going through right now. That didn't exactly comfort me but at least it confirmed she was still out there. I couldn't imagine if I lost her like I lost my parents.

On Thursday, I came home to a message. The little red light blinked as it told me someone had called while I was at work. I pressed play and heard a familiar voice.

"Jacob?" Lois' voice almost stuttered. "Is this the right number? I hope so. You should make your own answering machine message. I would have called your cell but I didn't want to bother you at work. Something happened, Jacob."

"There was an angry customer at work," she continued. "I guess Allison wasn't that into her job this week and he got mad. He hit her a few times and she got taken to the hospital. I know things aren't good between the two of you right now, but…if something happened to Doug and we weren't speaking, I'd want to know. Just, come as soon as you can."

The message cut off. Mallory was physically hurt. Someone had attacked her. Who could something like that to her?

My mind started to race a mile a minute as it stopped on one name. August. What if he found out about the baby and put me and Mallory together? Would he go after her? Of course he would. That guy was impossible to control and it seemed to fit. But it just didn't that he did it at the club.

Unless he wanted no one to piece it together as an attack on her. God knows what he could do to her, how he would have hurt her. He knows I could put it together and he wanted me to feel pain.

But whether it was him or not, one thing was clear. I made a quick call to Mr. Jenkins and told him an emergency had happened to someone close to me. He didn't ask many questions, probably hearing the panic in my voice. I thanked him gratefully and grabbed my bag again. After stuffing more clothes in it, I rushed out the door with the keys in my hand.

Mallory needed me and I needed to make sure she was okay. Nothing was more important to me than her.

**A/N; Okay, please no one kill me yet! I know two chapters in a row didn't end good. I know. *shakes head in shame* But, there is a plan here. Stay with me?**

**Leave a review?**


	22. A Horrible Night for a Bad Week

**A/N: There is violence in this chapter. If you don't want to read this, you can skip it. I apologize in advance. The story will mention any injuries you miss so it's really the reader's choice. **

"Allison?"

Lois' voice sounded like an echo over my breaking heart. It was extremely out of character for me to think shit like that but it was the only thing on my mind.

"Lois?" I whispered, my tears not far behind. "Can you come here? I know you're supposed to be packing and all but I just need to talk to someone."

"Of course, sweetheart," she answered. I could tell by the way she sounded she knew something was very wrong. It wasn't the worst thing ever but it was something that made me cry so it was a big deal to me.

"Thank you," I said back, my voice still hushed and ready to crack. Lois told me anytime then hung up.

She was here within 15 minutes. I opened the door, still wearing the same outfit I had on all day with red rimmed eyes. "Oh," she strung the word out to sound like an understanding and sadness at the same time then pulled me into a hug. "What happened?"

"It's Jacob," I mumbled into her shoulder, holding her tight. I didn't want her to see my face when I told her what happened.

"Is he okay?"

"Yeah," I sniffled. "But he left. I kicked him out."

Lois pulled away and I tried to pull her back but it was no use. She held both hands on the side of my face and pushed my hair back. She looked me straight in the eyes and asked, "Why?"

I turned my face away from her, not wanting her to see me start crying again. "Apparently, he had an affair with a married women when he left here."

I heard the gasp from behind me and I risked a glance at Lois. She was holding her hand over her mouth in shock. "And that's not even the worst part," I continued.

"It gets worse?"

"Jacob's a father now," I whispered. "I had no fucking idea he was even sleeping with someone before me and him. Yet he came here while his married ex was puking from his baby's morning sickness!"

I was yelling now. I couldn't help it. It didn't seem like there was anything left to do but yell. Jacob was gone because I made him leave. My heart felt like it was gone along with him.

"Wow," Lois whispered this time. "Have you seen this woman yet?"

"Yep."

I turned around again and went to the couch. I tried my hardest to not look at Lois and see what her reactions to my face were. My eyes started to prick and I could feel them watering. The first tear slid down my cheek again.

Lois came and sat by me, taking my hand. "Did he know she was pregnant when he left?"

"I don't think so," I shook my head. "But he knew he had the affair. So why would he keep something like that from me? I mean, I told him everything about me!"

The tears rolled down again, burning my face. "I think maybe he didn't want you to think less of him, Allison. Did you know just before he came here, Doug was having an affair, too?" I looked at her in shock so she continued.

"It was this waitress from a diner he went to all the time," her voice lowered. "He actually invited her to come here with him when the trip he met you on happened."

"Why didn't she go?" I asked, curious. It took my mind off my problem at the moment to know other people made mistakes because me and Jacob.

"There was an accident," Lois answered me. "She died and he didn't want to believe it. You have no idea what it felt like to see my husband so heartbroken over another woman. I know, it's selfish of me to be jealous because the woman died but it broke my heart, too."

"So what happened?" I asked another question. "What made it okay between you guys again?"

"We had a long talk," Lois sighed. "After Emily's death, I closed off. Doug became close to her because I wasn't there for him anymore. We were living separate lives in the same house."

"But you guys are fine now."

"Yeah, now," she chuckled. "It took some time to get back to where we were, though. I've loved Doug a large majority of my life. I wasn't giving him up without a fight."

I sat there, quiet and started to think about Lois and Doug. They seemed more in love than any other couple I'd ever seen. If they had problems like that, then everyone must. I know if I took the time to calm down and maybe even hear Jacob out, we could be able to work on this.

But I wasn't ready to. He hurt me, lied to me. It wasn't something I could just forget about. I needed time to think before I saw him again. Fuck, before I even talked to him. I needed a clear mind first.

I fell asleep soon after my thinking started. Lois let me lean on her and covered me with a blanket once I was asleep. I felt bad that she ended up sleeping on the floor.

Around 8 a.m., there was knocking on my front door. _Please, don't be Jacob_, I thought. But I knew how much I wanted it to be him despite my anger at the moment.

Swinging open the door, there stood Doug. "Hi," I sighed. My face must have looked horrible because his face softened.

"I talked to Jacob," he said in a very serious voice.

"What?" I exhaled in anger. "Why?"

"I wanted to know what was wrong," he replied. "Are you okay?"

"No," I huffed. I walked over to the couch again. Lois was up already but I had no idea where she'd gone.

When I sat down, he sat down next to me like his wife did the night before. "Do you want to talk?"

"Did you know?"

I turned to face him and he gave a look that said it all. His face was a mixture of apologies and worry. "Yes."

"How?"

"That night we first met," Doug started. "He took me aside and told me he was keeping something he didn't know how to tell you from you. He told me about the affair but I didn't know there was a baby involved. I swear."

I took a deep breath. "You knew and you didn't tell me?"

"He said he was going to tell you, Mallory," he looked me in the eyes again. I wanted to believe him.

"But he didn't."

"I could kill him for that," he sighed. "I trusted he would tell you and he didn't. I'm sorry for that. If I knew he wasn't going to, I would have said something."

"It's fine," I sighed again. "It's not your fault, though. It's his. It was his job to tell me that."

We both sighed again and I leaned on him. He held me close to him for a few minutes then Lois returned with breakfast. To be honest, I really needed to eat something.

The next days were a disaster. Tara noticed something was up with me one night at the club. She had decided to take me out to that club I took her to that one night. Turned out when we got there, she was meeting up with that guy from the other time. His name was Colin, apparently.

I walked to the bar just like the last time. Adam, that bartender, was working again. "Hey!" He exclaimed when he saw me.

"Hi," I half'mumbled when he approached me. "Can I get whatever's strongest, please?"

"Sure." He went to go get me what looked like whiskey but at that point, I didn't care. He came back with the glass and a bottle. "So what brings you here tonight? Miss the boyfriend still?"

"Nope," I popped the 'p' at the end. "He's not my boyfriend anymore."

"Oh," he sounded surprised but also relieved. "What happened?"

"Oh, he got some girl pregnant," I shrugged as if it was nothing.

"What an asshole," Adam said without thinking. "When was that?"

"Um, about 9 months ago." I took my glass and swallowed it all down. Adam poured more into my cup and I downed that one just as fast.

"Whoa," he breathed. "He's a fucking idiot, you know that?"

"He's not," I answered. "Really. He just screwed up and I'm pissed. He didn't even tell me he was sleeping with anyone. Then she comes to town, all married and 9 months pregnant."

Adam poured me another drink. "Married?"

"Uh-huh," I nodded, drinking another glass. "They had a bad marriage or some shit. The husband's an asshole. But that doesn't make it right for Jacob to sleep with his wife. I mean, maybe Marlena should have had the guts to leave him."

"Marlena's the mother?"

"Yeah," I said then continued. "I don't know how they thought an affair was the right way to go. If that husband's really as bad as Jacob told me, then he needs to watch his back. Sure, he left town but the husband's coming. And he does not sound like someone I'd want to piss off."

"They made a mistake," Adam shrugged. "But the way I see it. He was embarrassed. Jacob didn't want to let an amazing girl like you go so he kept it from you, hoping he could keep you by doing that."

"Well," I drank again. "That's why he lost me. So maybe it wasn't the best plan."

We talked a little bit more. Adam got off work at 2 a.m. and I was insanely drunk at that point. I didn't remember much besides him bringing me home and getting inside. I kissed him and he was really into it but I pulled away.

Not here. Not where me and Jacob had pretty much lived together. I couldn't do that to our relationship even if it was over.

"I'm sorry," I said, pulling away and untangled myself out of his arms.

"No, it's fine," he said but I could tell he was disappointed. Maybe he'd forget it since he'd drank a little too when his shift ended. "Are you gonna be okay?"

I nodded like a crazy person with my head bouncing. "Yes." I smiled as much of a real smile I could.

Adam kissed my head before leaving and looked at me one more time. After what I assumed was to check if I was telling the truth, he walked back to his car. I took my house key out and went right to sleep. Only to wake up with a killer hangover.

On Thursday, I felt like I was getting better. I thought my head was clear enough to talk to someone involved with this whole bullshit. I visited Marlena in the hospital.

She didn't hear me come to the dorrway and I saw why in her arms. The tiny baby boy was beautiful. He had exactly Jacob's hair color growing on his head and the tiniest little fingers and toes. I knocked twice and her face turned to me.

"Hi, Mallory," Marlena said, sitting herself more up without even bothering the baby in her arms.

"Hi," I said, still standing in the doorway.

"Come in," she said, knowing what conversation was coming. "I bet you wanna talk about Jacob."

I nodded and sat in the chair beside the bed. After taking a deep breath, I hoped my mind was clear enough for this. "Yes."

The baby started to fuss in her arms and Marlena soothingly "ssh-ed" him, the way you see mothers do.

"What's his name?" I heard myself asking then kicking myself internally.

"Simon," she beamed and looked at me again. I could really see Simon's face then.

"He's really beautiful, Marlena," I smiled at the little child. His smile seemed contagious and caused me no matter if I wanted to or not. "Has Jacob seen him?"

"No," she answered and looked back at her son. I swallowed the lump in my throat at seeing Jacob's child before he had. "That day, I needed to tell him. But he didn't stay long enough to see him. I was going to show him but I think he wanted to get back to you."

I sighed. "I kicked him out my house that night. I heard you two talking in here and he went back to Baton Rouge. God, I messed up, huh?"

"No," and she looked like she truly believed that. "He should have said something. But who am I to judge? I'm married and a couple of days ago, I had to try to explain the resemblances were just coincidence. He seemed calm, at least."

"Jacob told me about him," I whispered. "Is it true? Did he really threaten you?"

"Yes," she whispered back. "He did, multiple times. I was never strong enough to stand up to him until Jacob came. I always told myself he was a good person and that wasn't how he really is." She started shaking her head in denial. "But he's been amazing during the pregnancy."

"That's good," I nodded back.

Marlena reached over and held Simon with one arm, to hold my hand. "Jacob really loves you, Mallory. Believe me, he never looked at me close to how he looks at you."

My eyes welled up and I looked down at the floor. I didn't want to cry in front of her. Marlena squeezed my hand and I looked at her again.

"Do you love Jacob?"

"With everything in me," I replied, wiping some stray tears away.

"Then you know what you need to do," she nodded this time. "You guys were good together from what I know. Me and Jacob are over, I've made peace with that. So has he. But you – I don't think he can get over you so fast."

I let a small smile escape my lips and turned my hand over to squeeze hers back. "Thank you."

"No problem," she let a small smile out, too. Simon started to fuss in Marlena's arms again and it looked as if he was reaching for me. "I think he likes you. Do you want to hold him?"

I hesitated. But looking in little Simon's eyes highly reminded me of Jacob and I wanted to be as close to Jacob as possible at that moment. "Sure," I tried to make a cradle of my arms and Marlena handed him to me. She helped me fix my arms once hers were free.

I looked at Simon and smiled. He had this little smile on his face, too. His tiny fingers were trying to curl around strands of my hair. It felt like little tugs but I didn't mind. I was already in love with this baby. Jacob's baby.

That night, I went to work around 9 p.m. It was crowded as usual as I went to dance. Tara wasn't working tonight but I tried to manage without her pep talks between breaks. This one guy pretty much flirted his way into a back room with me. I wasn't that into it but I went anyway. I wasn't really in the mood for the backroom this week.

Once we got in there, he must have sensed my discomfort. I tried to pull off how I usually act back there but all I could think of was Jacob. This was my first private time with a customer since me and Jacob's break-up. I wasn't entirely focused.

The man asked for a lap dance and I tried my best. After a few minutes on his lap, I felt the familiar bulge come that I'd felt many times on customers. Especially after I brought them back here. He was smiling this shit-eating grin and I kept dancing.

At one point, he smacked my ass and left his hand there. I swallowed hard because I wasn't in the right mood for this. I should've called in sick or something.

Before I could even register his other hand, it came across my face and smacked me. "Concentrate, you whore," he said in a rough voice. I was disgusted and didn't want to be back there with him anymore.

I began to climb off of his lap when he grabbed me back down. "You're gonna stay right here til I get what I paid for," he said with the same tone.

I was scared about being back here with this man. I went back to dancing and he sat back and watched. When he was completely hard, he spoke again. "Now fuck me."

"I don't think I should -"

The man grabbed me by my hair and leaned my face by his dick. "You heard me. I'm paying a lot of money for this so I'm gonna get my money's worth."

"I think your time is up, sir," I said, my voice faltering.

"No, I don't think so," he smiled that grin again and never let go of my hair. The man stood up and pulled me with him. My legs were hitting the ground, almost like I was about to be dragged.

Instead of dragging me, he threw me down to the ground, face first. I felt the heat from the blood on my face. I saw the red on my left side and reached my hand up to check it but he pulled my arm back. I was about to scream before he covered my mouth with his hand.

"Please," I whimpered. "Please, just let me go." He looked at both sides of him at the wall and laughed. He reached for my hair again and pulled me right back up.

"I'll let you go when I'm done with you," he threatened me. Then he pushed me into the chair he had been sitting in and started to touch me all over. "What's a pretty young girl like you doing in a place like this, huh?"

I whimpered again when his fingers reached my tits, but kept silent. I didn't want to give him more to hit me for. He pushed my little top lower to reveal my chest to him and began to fondle and squeeze. He seemed as if it were turning him on but all I could feel was the vomit pile in my mouth.

I needed to get out of there. I needed someone to come help. The blood began to drip onto my shoulder and the man looked up from my breasts to see it. He grinned again then slapped the other side of my face.

My eyes started to prick and tear as he chuckled lightly. He pulled my top off then punched me in the stomach. The pain made me want to double over and go to sleep. I tried to hold my stomach from the pain but he held my arms together with one of his hands.

The other hand inched up my tiny skirt. I bit my lip to keep from screaming as his fingers stopped right before my entrance. No, I couldn't let him do that. I screamed as loud as I could before he could put his hand over my mouth again.

His hand holding my arms went to shutting me up and I tried to hit him. He stopped my arm mid-air and threw me down again. This time I landed on my back.

He smiled again and opened the door, leaving me there to scream in pain. I screamed another time and my boss came in. He had the bouncer come to carry me out of that room and into his car. I was rushed into the hospital and I didn't care what they were thinking. I didn't care about how little I was wearing. I just wanted the pain to stop.

The doctor gave me some painkillers and I went right to sleep. Lois and Doug were called immediately since I listed them as who to call. I was in and out of it when they visited. Lois held my hand. Marlena tried to visit me but after a minute, I told her get back to her son.

All I wanted to do was sleep. I heard a familiar set of footsteps walk into the room early in the morning. It must be when visiting hours started. The Riley's had already visited me so I didn't understand the emergency.

At least not until I turned my head. There stood Jacob, with a duffel bag. He was obviously exhausted and worried; he was panting even. I looked at him and saw in his eyes his heart fall.


	23. Swallowing the truth

I knew Mallory had been attacked. Lois' frantic voice said that much was true. I also knew it wasn't just some ploy to get me to come back to make up with my new ex.

As I ran into the hospital, asking whoever I can where the hell Mallory Carter is, I hadn't really thought about what she might look like.

Her left cheek was bandaged and the right side was really red, like it had been hit really hard and more than once. She looked like she wasn't in any pain at the moment but that meant little to me. It looked like it hurt her. It looked like he hurt her. I could feel it in every inch of me that August had done this to her.

But I didn't know how he found out about her.

Mallory stared at me, waiting for me to say something. When she looked annoyed at the silence, she turned her head and stared out the window.

I took a deep breath and sighed. "Hi," was the best I could come up with. Her head turned back to me, still annoyed. I could tell that was not the word she was waiting for. "How are you feeling?"

"How do you know?" Mallory asked me, ignoring my question.

"Lois called me," I answered. I couldn't stop staring at the bandage on her face. How bad was it underneath? I didn't want to think of her hurt and especially not someone doing that to her.

"Fuck," she whispered then spoke up. "Why would she think I want to see you?"

I took another deep breath. I was obviously unwanted here. "Maybe she thought I'd want to know."

"Why would you?"

Her face looked serious. She really thought I wouldn't want to know or care about what happens to her. "Because I love you. Because maybe even though you hate me and you kicked me out, I still care about what happens to you. And I definitely want to know if somebody hurts you, Mallory."

"That's bullshit," she scoffed. "I think you came here because you feel sorry for me. You hate that this happened to me without you here and you feel pity."

I felt the anger coming up again. "That's the bullshit, Mallory." She turned her head and I walked closer the bed, putting my bag down and sitting. "You know I care about you. You know I want nothing bad to happen to you. What happened didn't change that."

"Then why did you break my heart?" Her head turned back at me and she keeping her lips together, her eyes red and starting to tear.

"Mallory..."

"You lied to me," she started, the tears falling one by one. "Then I go to work and this guy just starts hitting me and throwing me down. He thinks it's okay to treat me like some toy. He didn't give a shit about me. The whole time, he was grinning."

I felt the real anger boil at the attacker. "He hit you and threw you? What else did he do to you?"

She looked like she regretted saying anything and shook her head. "Nothing."

"Mallory. What did he do to you?"

Her hands pulled her blanket down slightly then pulled her top up with it. Her stomach was bandaged and I could see the bruises form where the bandage didn't cover. She pulled it back down and leaned off the bed, turning to face the wall.

Once again, she pulled her top up and I saw red and purple marks. Another bruise. Then she pulled the blanket even more down, pulling her sweatpants up, her knees were red, too.

"What happened, Mal?" I was surprised my voice could even speak. I was so shocked about how many bandages and bruises she had on her.

"He, um, he threw me down a couple of times," she replied, staring at her hands. The blanket was back up already. I must have missed it in my shock. "One time I fell on my stomach – it broke two of my ribs, that fall. The other time I landed on my back."

She sniffled and I saw tears flow more freely down her eyes and cheek. "And your knees?"

"He grabbed me by my hair," she sniffled another time. "I was on my knees when he did that and he was kind of dragging me. So they cut up a little bit but not bad enough they needed bandages, too."

"Is there anything I can do?"

It felt like it meant nothing but what else was I supposed to say? 'I'm going to murder that asshole that hurt you and I might know who it was?' Didn't seem like the best thing at the moment.

"No," she shook her head again. "I think I'll be fine. I'm on a light painkiller right now. My injuries weren't as bad as some people so it's not the heavy kind." Mallory chuckled at the end, obviously trying to brighten it up.

"Have you seen Doug and Lois yet?"

"Yeah," she sniffled. "They're my emergency contact." Her face was sad then it smiled a little bit. "It was a little funny being brought in here in my outfit from the club, though. The doctors were like 'whoa.'"

I didn't know how to smile back. I faked one but I don't think I did a good job because hers faded.

"I don't know what I'm supposed to say," I said honestly. "I've never been in a situation like this."

"Me, either," she chuckled then frowned. "Look, you don't have to say anything. I know I'm being a bitch but I'm really glad to see you, Jacob."

"You're not being a bitch," I said. "You're hurt and this didn't make things any better."

Mallory sighed and I did the same. She reached over and rubbed her thumb over my hand. "I'm gonna be fine, Jacob."

"I know," I tried to form another smile but I couldn't do it. "I just don't like that this happened to you. You don't deserve this. Nobody does."

"I know," she repeated my words. "But it did. We can't do anything about it. I just need to heal then I can go back to work -"

What? Her words took me off guard. "You're going back to work?"

"What else am I supposed to do, Jacob?"

"I don't know," I half-screamed but calmed a little when I looked at her hand still on mine. I needed to calm down. I had to. I love her and she'd already been hurt more than enough. "I just didn't think you'd be going back to work. Isn't that where this happened?"

"Yes, but I know the guy's face," she assured me. "I won't be going anywhere with him. I doubt he's even allowed back."

"You know his face?" She saw the turn I was taking the conversation and looked confused.

"Yeah," she nodded slightly. "Why?"

"I have an idea of who it could have been," I replied, not wanting to give her too much hope.

"What? Who?"

Mallory's hand came off mine as she tried to sit up straighter. Her face looked interested, excited but also scared. "I think it might have been August."

"_August?_" Her voice rose louder. "Marlena's husband, August? That crazy bastard that threatened her? That same fucker?"

"Yes," I answered low.

"That motherfucker," she whispered. "Well, how do I find out? Do you have any pictures of him?"

"I think Marlena does with her," I shrugged. "I don't know, though. We hadn't talked much since she's back." Her face looked down again, instantly remembering what's happened since Marlena came back. What's happened to us since then. My hand moved to her chin and lifted it back up. "I don't love her, Mallory."

"So you say," she shrugged, trying to play it off.

"No," I confirmed. "I do not love her. I love you. What me and her had is over, it has been. Maybe it wasn't real to begin with since my mind always went back to you."

Mallory stared into my eyes and new tears filled her eyes.

"What? Does it hurt?"

"No," she shook her head, her voice thick. "It's just – I love you, too. I just can't think about this right now. I don't want to get hurt again and I'm here so it's not the first thing on my mind at the moment."

"Oh," I said, pulling my hand back but she grabbed it and twined our fingers together.

"I'm not saying never again," she began. "I'm saying, I need a clear head. Any big choice I make right now might be influenced by this shit that just happened to me. It's not the frame of mind you'd want me in."

"That's not true," I said back. "I'd want you in any frame of mind. I just want you."

"You can't do this."

"Do what?"

"Be sweet," she sniffled. "I'll feel like you're only doing out of sympathy and not because you love me. I want to be better when I talk to you."

"Okay." I took my fingers out of hers and stood up, getting my bag. "But I'll call Marlena and ask her to show you a picture of August. Maybe you can find out if it's him and just let me know, all right?"

She nodded. "Jacob, you don't have to leave."

"No," I looked down then right back up again. "I should. Who knows? I might even get my old hotel room back."

"Jacob," her voice was sad. "You can stay at my place. I know you're leaving because of what I said but I'm staying here for at least a few more days. So my place is empty."

"Thanks," I cracked a small smile this time. She smiled back. It wasn't the same one I was used to but it was genuine. I turned out the door and at the doorway, glanced at her again. She gave me another smile and waved so I waved back.

Then I was gone.

I drove back to Mallory's place slowly. It felt like everything was going to change when I walked in there. I didn't know how she was doing after I left. I had no idea what to expect when I walked in so I was a little bit scared.

Finally, I reached it and walked up to the door, my bag over my shoulder. Opening the door, I sighed and took a deep breath. Everything was the same, with the exception of a little mess around the couch.

The picture of us together still sat on the table beside the couch. It made my heart tighten to see that she left it out. I thought she would have hid that. I put my bag down and checked the rest of the place. The kitchen was the same, too.

Walking into the bedroom turned my mood around. I thought of everything we'd shared in this room – not just the sex either, but every moment and conversation. It felt weird being here after what happened, even if it was without her.

My mind traveled back to what happened to her. I needed to call Marlena. I wanted to know if he did it. If he did, I wanted to kill him. I would try. I wasn't able to do that when I tried to protect Marlena but this was different. I'd never heard of a violent attack like this from August.

I didn't even think I did if I put together what I did know of his violence.

The bed was cold. Mallory must not have had anyone here since before she left for work. It wasn't even made. I sat down on it and pulled my cell phone out. The wallpaper was Mallory, smiling and making a goofy face. I heard the laugh in my head everytime I looked at it.

I stood up again and walked into the main room and dialed Marlena's number. "Hello?" she answered.

"Hey," I sighed. "I need to ask you a question."

"Okay," she sounded hesitant but agreed anyway. "What's wrong?"

"I need a picture of August," I blurted a little too fast.

"Why?"

"Mallory was attacked," I answered.

I heard a gasp on the other side. "Is she okay?"

"Sort of," I sighed. "She got badly hurt but it's not serious. She knows what her attacker looks like and my mind instantly clicked to August. Do you think you can show her a picture of him?"

"Yeah, sure," she replied. "I can't believe this. I thought he was calm when I told him, Jacob. I really did."

"You think he'd do this, too?"

"Yes," she didn't even need to think about it. "If you thought it and you barely know him, what do you expect from me? I married the guy. I know what he's capable of. Thankfully he never beat me up that I ended up in the hospital but I am so sorry Mallory had to have this happen to her. Whether it was him or not, though."

"I'm sure she'd appreciate that," I said, trying to make the conversation lighter. "Could you take the picture and go see her? They were pains in the ass when I went to see her, though."

There was a pause on the other end then she spoke again. "How bad is she?"

"Bruises, two broken ribs," I sighed, not wanting to remember. "Her knees got cut and I think her face did, too. She didn't explain that one."

Another low gasp from Marlena. "I'll see her as soon as I find the picture."

"Thank you." I smiled slightly again, thankful there was something that could come from me knowing anyone. All I did was get them hurt.

"No problem." We said good-bye then hung up. I looked around the room and saw how quiet it seemed. Whenever I was here, something was happening. There wasn't many still moments, especially the last time I was here. I felt exhausted, though. I hadn't slept since when I went to sleep Wednesday night.

I drove straight here when I found out about what happened.

Laying down on the couch, I closed my eyes. I tried to keep my thoughts pleasant but it was hard. All I could see was August hovering over Mallory with this grin on his face. She looked so tiny compared to him and scared. He kept hitting her and throwing her on the ground.

I was in the room with them, screaming for help and to him to stop. But no one heard me and he kept hurting her.

The next thing I remember is my phone ringing loudly. I leaned over the floor and picked it up, seeing Mallory's name on my screen.

I flipped it open, excited to hear her voice no matter what she was about to say. "Mallory?"

"It was him," she sobbed. I could tell she had been crying already long before the phone even dialed.

"August?" I was still half-asleep. I looked at the clock in the corner of my eye and saw I'd been sleeping two hours.

"Yes," she sniffled. "Marlena came and showed me his picture. I knew the first second I saw the picture. I'll never forget those eyes. It was him, Jacob."

She was sobbing uncontrolled now. I didn't know what to do. "Is there something I can do?"

"Can you come here?" she whispered. "I really need to see you. Is that okay?"

"Yes," I nodded though she couldn't see me. "Of course it is."

"Thank you," she still whispered then sniffled again. I didn't want her in this kind of pain.

"Anytime," I replied. She hung up and I rushed back to the hospital, not caring what I looked like even though I had just been sleeping.

She looked up when she heard my footsteps in the doorway. Her eyes were red-rimmed, her cheeks the same shade. The expression was sad but relieved.

I went right up to her and hugged her. She instantly responded and put her arms around me, tightening me to her. "I hoped I was wrong," I whispered into her ear.

"Me, too," she sniffled. Her head leaned on me and I could feel the wetness of her cheeks on me.

"What can I do?"

"You being here is enough," she said. I pulled away and looked at her. Her arms didn't want to let me go but she did. I wiped the fresh tears from her cheeks, keeping my hand there and she forced a smile. "Thank you for coming."

"You needed me," I simply said.

"Yeah," she shrugged, "but you didn't need to."

"Yes, I did."

Her hand reached up and held my hand to her face, leaning into it. "You love me too much."

"Not possible," I half-smiled. "Do you need anything? Something to eat, drink?"

"I could really use a beer," she chuckled. I laughed lightly with her. "No. I don't think I need anything. Just stay a bit, please?"

"Yeah," I nodded and she gave me another smile. Our hands fell to the bed and stayed together. Her head leaned back and relaxed so I sat down and stared at her. Mallory's eyes started to close a little. "You should sleep."

"No," she moaned. "I can't. I don't want you stuck here while I sleep."

"I won't be stuck here," I replied. "I came here of my free will. Now sleep. I'll be here when you wake up."

Mallory smiled again and squeezed my hand, turning it over then leaned her head back again. After her eyes were shut, I stared at her again. She never looked more beautiful then when she was asleep. Even with the bandage on her cheek, she was still the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. It made her even more so to know what she went through and that she's still here.

I felt my own head lean back on the chair. My eyes started to close, too and I slept better with her hand in mine.

I was woken up by people walking in the room. Mallory stirred, too and looked at the doorway so my eyes followed hers. A nurse was walking in with a wheelchair. She didn't tell me it was that serious.

She noticed my eyes and turned her head back to me. "It's because of my knees. I don't think I can walk right again yet. They still hurt a little."

"Oh," I whispered. Mallory took her hand out of mine and turned to the side of the bed, ready to get off. "Where are you going?"

"She's getting X-Rays," the nurse answered me. I nodded, thankful nothing worse had happened while she slept. For all I knew, a fever had spiked or something.

Mallory was out of the bed and sitting in the chair already when I looked back at her from the nurse's face. She gave me another smile as the nurse began to wheel her. "You don't have to stay," she said. The nurse stopped to let us talk before the X-Ray.

"I want to."

"It might take a while, right?" She looked to the nurse for help.

"Yes, it might," she confirmed. I wasn't sure if she only said to make me not wait or because it was true.

"Okay," I sighed. "But you'll call me when it's over?"

"Yes," she smiled. Then the nurse began to wheel her out again so Mallory waved and I did the same back. The free time after knowing August did this to her wasn't going to be good for me. That nightmare consumed my mind if I didn't have Mallory in front of me. I kept imagining that it wasn't real and what happened was worse.

In my mind, Mallory wasn't really sitting with me. I just imagined her to make myself feel better about what happened. I took a deep breath and called Marlena and asked her where August was.

"Don't do anything stupid," she scolded me. "I know it's horrible what he did to Mallory but that doesn't mean you should do something about it."

"Just tell me where he is," I said through my teeth.

She hesitantly told me. I know she was worried but I needed to confront him. He needed to know what he did wasn't right and he'd accomplished what he wanted – he hurt me and the woman I love. It needed to be over or I was never going to be able to leave Mallory's side.

I drove to the address Marlena gave me, hoping she wasn't lying to protect me from myself. It was a hotel and I marched up to his room, banging on the door loudly. He opened after just two knocks.

"Well, well," he chuckled. "I was wondering how long it'd take until I saw you."

"So you don't deny it?"

"No," he grinned. It was the same grin I imagined in the nightmare of him hitting Mallory. "She was a screamer, you know."

I slammed him against the wall, not caring the door was open. "You fucking piece of shit."

August just kept laughing. It was like he didn't have any fears or a conscience. The last part I knew, though.

"How did you find out about her?" I spat through my teeth with more anger than ever.

"I went to go see my wife at the hospital," he started and gave me a knowing look. "You know, the one you knocked up. And I heard her talking to someone about you. The girl said she loved you so I figured that was how to get you back."

"Get me back?" I slammed him against the wall again, harder this time. "Is this some kind of game to you? She is a person! You don't get to do this to her or anyone else."

"Who do you think you're talking to?" He pushed me back and stepped away from the wall. "You slept with my wife. You got her pregnant. I believed that child was mine for nine months."

"That doesn't justify what you did," I yelled. "It doesn't make it okay for you to hurt her."

"Why not?" he grinned again. "How did it feel when you saw her? Did it feel like your breathe was knocked out of you? Because that's how it felt when I learned that baby is not mine."

"You don't have a heart, August," I said. "You don't feel anything and you don't love anyone. You possess them. Guess what? People can't be owned. And you can't go around hitting them or threatening them."

"Really?" he grinned even bigger. "Because your girl – she was fun to hit. Hardly put up a fight. Even when I was touching her, she just let me."

That did it. My arms swung and hit him hard in the jaw. My hand still hurt from when I punched the wall when I went home after me and Mallory's fight. I shook the hurt off and August just brought his hand to his jaw.

He smiled. "You're gonna pay for that." He came towards me and crashed me into the wall this time. My back smashed into it and I felt the pain shoot through me. I ignored it and pushed him away. I punched him again and was about to again when he caught my hand.

August twisted my arm back. I winced but tried to not show the pain. "You know, Jacob? I had hope for you. I thought you were a good guy. I thought you were a good vet. But then you had sex with my wife. If you want, I can go apologize to your girl. Maybe even do to her what you did to my wife."

The smile on his face looked like one of the devil. "You sick fuck." I hit him again and after I did, he got me on the ground. "Stay away from her."

He laughed and looked me right in the eye. "I'll do whatever the fuck I please. If I want to go visit your little stripper, I will. And there's not a damn thing you can do about it."

He punched me this time. His fist came pounding on me in a row and I felt the blood on my lip and cheek. He walked to the side of me and started to kick me in the stomach. I screamed but it wasn't loud because of the blood. I started choking on it and didn't know what to do.

"Say good-night," he said as he leaned over me and his foot came slamming on my stomach. I tried to yell so someone would know what was happening but nothing came out. He walked out of the room after looking back at me again, grabbing an already packed suitcase.

I laid there on the floor, hoping someone would find me.

About fifteen minutes later, I saw a shadow by the door. Marlena rushed over to me when she saw me. "Jacob? Are you all right?"

I tried to speak but I couldn't. The blood was still in my mouth and my eyes felt heavy. I just wanted to sleep. It wasn't the right choice, I kept telling myself. I faintly heard Marlena dial 911 and tell them to come. I just laid back and waited for them to come.


	24. What August Did

**A/N: Okay so I hope no one hates me for the last two chapters and what happened. I know, I shouldn't hurt them but trust me, it will make them stronger **** Just believe I know what I'm doing here and hopefully keep reading. And I hope no one needs tissues or anything as I write this one…**

I knew I told Jacob he didn't have to stay when I went in for the X-rays but I didn't expect seeing someone else there. Marlena sat in the chair by my bed with this look on her face. The nurse wheeled me in so I gave her a look that said 'my friend could help me'. The nurse nodded and I wheeled myself in.

"What are you doing here?" I asked Marlena when the nurse was gone. "Have you talked to Jacob and heard about my meltdown yet?"

She didn't laugh with me when I did. Her face just looked sad and she took a deep breath before speaking. "Jacob's here."

"Okay," I sighed, wheeling closer. "So why isn't he in here with you? Is he getting food or something?"

"No," Marlena shook her head. "I mean, he went after August. He's in the hospital right now."

I gasped loudly, not caring what she thought of that. "Well, where is he? Can I see him?"

"Mallory," she looked me straight in the eye. "I don't know if you can. You just got in here yourself. Do you really think it's okay for you to just go looking for him?"

"Where is he?"

My tone was annoyed. I liked Marlena and all, but I was worried as shit now. I needed to see him. After what that bastard did to me, I wasn't sure how far he'd take it with Jacob. Especially now that he knows the baby isn't his.

"Okay," she sighed again. "I'll take you to his room."

"Thank you," I sighed, too. I didn't want to wait any longer to see him.

Marlena took me down two floors in the elevator. I felt like I could push faster if I was the one doing it but I didn't want to be a pain. She was doing more than she should by taking me to his room.

Finally, we reached a doorway. The door was wide open, as if there was so many people who were supposed to be going in and out. Marlena stopped my chair there so I gripped the wheels ready to move. For some reason, I couldn't move, though.

"He might look bad," she whispered in a small voice.

I looked up at her face and saw it was sad. I felt a tiny piece of jealousy break through my usual strength. It wasn't that I thought he was gonna run off with her and live happily ever after with their child. But I was scared of those past feelings and also what she felt.

Even though I heard him say he doesn't love her anymore and it's over between them, I still was unsure of her true feelings. She wasn't trying to win me back with her words like he was so who knew.

I looked forward again and urged myself to move. After another deep breath and a few pushes, I saw him. He was still asleep, with bruises and bandages on his face. It was red, purple, blue and black. It felt like I was just seeing colors.

Marlena was right. He did look bad and I didn't mean that in a bad way. The bruises were very prominent on his face and I wheeled myself closer.

"Has he been awake yet?" I asked, still staring at Jacob's face instead of Marlena's.

"No," she sat in a chair on the other side of the room as I reached the edge of his bed. "I've been here since he was brought in and I told them to call me when he wakes up. Simon's with Camel and Walter. Remember those guys you met we worked with? Turns out they love babies."

She chuckled lightly but you could tell it wasn't all real. She looked at Jacob just like I did. "Why did he go after him?"

I knew the answer to that. I wasn't completely stupid but I had to hear it out loud anyway. It's almost as if I wouldn't believe my conclusion was true unless I heard someone else say it.

"You know why," Marlena said as she looked down at her hands. I could tell in that small notion there was still feelings inside her for Jacob. I couldn't think about that right now so I pushed it aside. "He freaked out after he found out his thoughts were right. He called me and asked where he was staying. It's a good thing I checked there. I knew he was going to do something stupid, I just knew it."

"But why would he?" I whispered. Looking at him, he looked so fragile and unlike the man I fell in love with. "He knew what that fucker was capable of. He told me about you and the threats. Didn't he know it was dangerous to go after him?"

"Yes," she answered. "But I don't think he cared about himself too much at that moment. All Jacob cared about was the fact that August had gone after you. He threatened you. Jacob didn't need much more even if it was a horrible idea."

I looked at Marlena and saw her eyes well up. It was more than obvious when she spoke about him she still loved him. After a few seconds, I turned back to Jacob and felt like my eyes were going to tear up, too.

I reached my hand out and linked my fingers with his. His hands felt cold and it made me think the worst immediately. Stealing a glance at the monitor with his heartbeat, I calmed down a little but I wasn't sure how that thing worked. For all I knew, it was playing tricks on me and he wasn't as okay as it claimed.

"Do you want me to go?"

My head snapped away from Jacob again and to Marlena. "Why would you think that?"

"Because I'm obviously intruding here," she replied. I wanted to say no but she continued. "I've had time to think about that he's here but you haven't. I spent a long time waiting in your room for you to get back, you know?"

"No," I shook my head. "I didn't know that."

"I did," she half-smiled. "But you were gone a while."

I chuckled with her. "Yeah. My X-rays took a little longer than expected."

"I think I should get going, though," she sighed and stood up. "My son is a few days old so I should get back. Jacob has company now, anyway."

"Thank you for telling me," I smiled at her in the best one I could make as she reached the doorway. She just nodded and walked out the door. I couldn't tell if she was really gone or not but I just sat there and stared at Jacob.

He looked peaceful yet heartbroken. But maybe it was because seeing him like this was breaking my heart. This must be how it felt when he walked in the hospital room to see me.

I never thought I would feel so strongly seeing someone in here. But like all the many other times, Jacob brought something out inside me I didn't know was there. He made me fall in love. He made me cry. This man in front of me made me more human.

"Hi," I said to him even though I doubted he could hear me. I brushed his hair back and smiled. "What a way to spend a birthday, huh? Mine's in a few hours and here we are, both in the hospital." I let myself let out a little laugh to that part. "This is where you're supposed to say something, you know? Tell me it's not that bad or some shit like that."

Jacob stayed asleep so I kept brushing his hair and talking. "Marlena says you haven't woken up yet. I think you were waiting for it to turn 12 midnight. You make me worry about you then just for my birthday, wake up and everything's all better."

"She's worried about you, you know," I continued. "I am, too. But I think she still loves you. I know, I know nothing about you guys' relationship or her, even. But I can tell. Some women's intuition or some shit like that. Who could blame her, right? You're fucking amazing. And I love you more than anyone I've ever loved before."

Still no response so I kept going with my monologue. "I didn't even love my parents as much as I love you. Not even Lois or Doug. You brought out this girl in me. I have feelings and cry now. You have no one but yourself to blame for that, Jacob. You changed me in one of the best possible ways and also the worst."

I sighed again and squeezed his hand tighter, hoping for some kind of response. I noticed for the first time his knuckles were bloody but also healing a little bit. He must have punched him. Good. That asshole deserved that. He deserves much worse than that, especially if Jacob doesn't wake up.

I decided to let my talking distract me again. "You wanna know why it's the worst? Because I had it easy never letting feelings get in the way. I never had my heart broken before I met you. I never cried over a boy and called someone to come comfort me. I never used to get drunk to forget about someone. But I did because of you, Jacob."

"But it's also the best for some reasons," I sighed and smiled a little bit as the tears continued falling. "You gave me the opportunity to fall in love. You made me happy. You make me happy, even if I told you to leave. You come to my side when I need you, no matter what. Even if I was a complete bitch to you."

"And the best part of all," I wiped my cheeks with my free hand and kept going. "Is that it's you I fell in love with. I can't imagine a greater person than you, Jacob. A more amazing one. You love with no limit and know how to make any day bright. I'm being a total girl as I say all this and completely lame. I used to hate all those things. But not with you. I embrace them with you."

I stopped brushing his hair with my hand and held his hand with my two. "So you have to wake up. You have to because I love you and I want you in my life. I honestly don't know what I'm going to do without you."

I sniffled again and laid my head down on the bed right beside our twined hands. I cried on the sheets and felt my eyes wanting to go to sleep. I had no idea how I even could sleep. Not just because I was uncomfortably sitting in this wheelchair or because my head was crouched over.

It was because I was scared of what could happen.

I had no idea if he was going to be okay. If something happened to him while I slept, I could miss out on these minutes I would have had. I lifted my head up again and just stared at him. He was, of course, still sleeping. I tried to think of every happy moment we had together but I was coming up blank.

The only thing that was crossing my mind was what was happening. I couldn't think of the time we first met or first said 'I love you'. Nothing important or even little was coming to mind. All I could process was seeing Jacob lying in the hospital bed. He went after someone to defend me, to protect me and this was his price.

He didn't deserve this. That asshole deserved to be put in jail for this. My mind was too pissed off at him to even think his name. It wasn't even what he did to me that pissed me off anymore. I was fine. I was breathing and talking and awake. Jacob was lying unconscious in a hospital bed. I didn't want to imagine if he didn't wake up all because he defended me.

Eventually, I must have fallen asleep because I was woken by a hand shaking my shoulder. My eyes were still heavy from sleep but I looked up anyway. It was Doug.

"Hey," he said to me. "You okay?"

I let one hand out of Jacob's and tried to turn without loosening the other one. "No."

"I should have known," he sighed. "Let's get you back to your room. Let you get some sleep in a bed."

"No," I shook my head, determined not to leave. "I can't leave him. I need to stay here."

"Come on," Doug urged me. "You just got admitted here yourself. You should get some rest, Mallory."

"How did you find out?" I asked him, changing the subject.

He knew what I was trying to do and answered anyway. "Marlena called me. I never even spoke to this woman before but here she was, calling my cell phone. She told me Jacob went after her husband and was in the hospital. Also that he was pretty bad and you were in his room last she saw."

"Oh," I sighed. I guess I should thank her for not letting them worry about me, either when I wasn't in my room. But also for telling them what I never would have been able to say to them. "That's good."

"Yeah, it is," Doug agreed. "But you need some rest. You were badly injured, too, so just come with me to your room. Jacob'll still be here after you've slept."

I couldn't tell him how worried I was or that I wasn't sure he was right. I just nodded and looked back at the man I loved on the bed. "Okay."

I squeezed his hand in mine and tried to stand up. Doug tried to help me get out of the chair but I pushed his hand away as polite as I could. He understood and I leaned over Jacob. I kissed him on the cheek and when to whisper in his ear.

"I love you," I said as low as I could, hoping Jacob could hear me, though. "You better wake up or I'm going to be really mad at you."

Once again, I stood as straight as I could and went back to sitting in the chair, kissing his hand as I sat. I didn't want this to be the last time I saw him but I had to believe he was going to be okay. He just had to be.

Doug let me have my moment and waited for me. I didn't trust myself to walk yet so I stayed in the chair. Doug started to wheel me out as I glanced back at Jacob before the sight of him disappeared. I stared until he was out of my line of vision and a tear fell down my cheek.

When we were back in my room, Doug helped me get into the bed. "I'm going to call Lois and tell her what's happened."

I nodded as he went into the hall and could hear him distantly whispering to his wife. I was left alone with my thoughts and that was dangerous. I again wondered if this was how Jacob felt before he went after that mother fucker. Was he afraid to close his eyes?

I'll have no idea how he felt now. I'd just have to wait.

My eyes closed faster this time. I guess I was really tired. When I woke up the next morning, I looked over at the clock. It was 6:30 a.m. I didn't know if Doug was still here or he went home. I didn't know if Lois came, either. It was good I got the sleep over with so now I could focus on whatever the upcoming day had. I just wasn't sure I wanted to face it.

The sun looked like it was just coming out and I was pissed visiting hours didn't start yet. It was my 18th birthday. Jacob wanted to be up for this. But if he was awake, I would have known. The hospital probably would have called Marlena because she asked to be. And she would have tried calling my extension line here. Or at least call a nurse or something to wake me with the news.

I sighed a heavy sigh and felt exhausted even though I slept for hours. It felt as if it wasn't enough. Maybe I didn't sleep as well as I seemed to have. I was too worried anyway.

A nurse walked by and I was hoping she was coming in here to tell me Jacob was awake. But she just walked past. Another nurse came past but he didn't stop, either. I sighed and was starting to give up. I didn't know if it was possible for me to fall back asleep now even though I was really tired.

Some how I did fall asleep again. I was surprising myself with that a lot in the past 12 hours. It was 9:16 a.m. now. Visiting hours would have started. I saw a tray by me. On it was a note that said how I was asleep when breakfast was being served and my nurse thought I could use the sleep. It also said to call them when I woke up.

I wasn't hungry. I called anways and my usual nurse walked in. "Good morning," she smiled.

I smiled back as much as I could and sat up. "Did anyone call for me?"

"Sorry," she gave me a look that showed sympathy. "No calls."

I felt my face fall. "Do you think I could eat in another room?"

The nurse thought about that for a second. "What room?"

I smiled brightly and told her Jacob's room. She hesitantly agreed but only if she could make sure I'm okay getting there. I nodded like a crazy person. She took me down to his room. Her name was Angie, I learned. I felt rude I hadn't cared to ask before.

"Here we are," Angie said as we reached the room. Jacob still laid there, his chest moving up and down so I sighed in relief. "Is this the right room?"

I looked up at her from my chair, holding my tray on my lap. "Yes, it is."

"Who is he?" she asked as she wheeled me in further. "Boyfriend, brother? Friend?"

"Ex-boyfriend," I answered. "But it's really recent, the break-up. And he's in here because he went after who put me in here."

I felt my voice crack a little at the end of the sentence but I stayed in control. I didn't want Angie to see one of my breakdowns.

"That's very sweet of him," Angie nodded, smiling. "I'm sure he'd be very happy to know you're coming to sit with him."

"I hope so," I nodded back as I began to cut my waffles on my tray. We finally reached the side of his bed so I decided it was time to eat. "He hasn't woken up since he was brought in. I have no idea if he's going to be okay or not."

Angie's eyes went to his bruised face then mine. She connected how dangerous the man he went after must be. "He's very brave to go after someone for you, you know. I don't think I know anyone who's done something like that."

"Jacob's amazing," I smiled as I answered. "He's got this huge heart and he opens it up so easy. Sometimes he gets hurt or I hurt him. Even others do."

"Where are his parents?"

"They're passed," I replied, my head leaning down as if I was speaking about my own. "We met right after he lost them."

"Oh, I'm sorry," and she actually was. I sensed something in Angie. She wasn't just a nurse for the money or credits if she was in college. She actually cared about the patients here and I was happy to have her here with me.

"I guess it's okay," I said as I continued eating. "I just wish I could have met them. Tell them how amazing their son is."

She said nothing and just watched the two of us even though he was asleep. "Tell you what, Mallory? How about I give you two some time alone and we'll pretend I was here the whole time? I feel like I'm in the way."

"You're not," I replied. "I'm actually very thankful you're here. But thank you, I think I could use a minute or two."

Angie just nodded and left the room quietly. I turned back to Jacob, putting my food aside. I didn't feel the need to eat right away so I just focused on him. His breathing was normal and so was his heartbeat. I couldn't keep my eyes off of him.

"It's my birthday now," I sighed, linking my hand with his again like I did the day before. "Come on, Jacob. You can wake up. I know you, you don't give up."

I waited a few minutes before I tried to let go of his hand and try to eat again. Something grabbed my hand back and I looked over. Jacob's eyes were still closed but his hand was deathly gripping mine.

"Jacob?"

I watched him begin to stir. I tried to stand up.

"Nurse!" I screamed. Angie came running in, I guess she wasn't far. "He's waking up. What do I do?"

"Let me find his doctor," she said to me and then rushed back out.

"Jacob?" I asked him, still trying to get my hand out of his and his still wouldn't let me go. His eyes opened slowly and he smiled when he saw me sitting beside him. I smiled back in a triumphant smile of relief. "Thank God, you're awake."

I leaned over him and hugged as best as I can without hurting him. I saw him wince slightly but he ignored his reactions. He tried to lean to whisper in my ear so I bent my head the right way for him and he said three simple words.

"Happy birthday, Mallory."

**A/N: Soooo? What do you think? Good? Bad? Let me know.**


	25. Waking Up

I heard Mallory's voice. It sounded so far away and like a dream. She told me how it was her birthday and I should wake up. I could feel her hand on mine like she was really right beside me. She must have turned away and I felt myself grip her tighter. It was the first time in this dream I thought reality was creeping in.

"Jacob?" I heard Mallory's voice say yet ask as if it were a question. It sounded even closer this time so I tried to open my eyes. It felt like a weird dream, one where I didn't know if I was able to open them.

She screamed for a nurse and that time, I knew it was real. Where was I? I couldn't remember a last thing that happened.

I opened my eyes and saw the most beautiful sight I've ever seen. Mallory was sitting at my beside, with almost tears in her eyes and a relieved smile on her face. She hugged me and I felt instant pain in my ribs but I ignored it. Nothing was more important than being with her right now.

I whispered in her ear but I couldn't make it so she leaned in. "Happy Birthday, Mallory," I whispered.

Mallory leaned away to look into my eyes. It felt like she was staring at me but I didn't care. I just looked back into her eyes, ignoring that previous pain from her hug. "I was so worried about you," she sniffled. "I thought I lost you."

"No," I said to her, still looking at her wet eyes. "You can't get rid of me even if you tried."

Mallory chuckled lightly. "I don't wanna try to get rid of you." She sat back down in that horrible wheelchair I hated her in. Little bits of the past days came back to me when I saw that chair. She saw the confusion and the linking things together look on my face and spoke. "You went after that asshole. Do you remember that?"

Right. I forgot about August. "Yeah," I sighed. "I guess I blocked that one out." I chuckled this time but her face stayed serious.

"Don't you ever do that to me again, Jacob Jankowski," she scolded. "I was going out of my mind, not knowing whether or not you'd wake up."

"How long was I asleep?"

She rolled her eyes at the word "unconscious" but answered me anyways. "Just under two days. But it was a scared two days for me."

"You came to eat breakfast with me?" I asked her, eyeing the tray on the table.

"Yeah," she blushed. It was adorable. "I wanted to have my birthday breakfast with you, not sitting by myself in a stupid hospital room."

"You're still in a hospital room," I pointed out.

"Yeah, but I had you with me. Asleep or not."

We just watched each other's face for what seemed like hours. It must have been only minutes though because my doctor came in to check on me. Mallory moved herself out of the way, taking her tray on her lap with her. She watched me cautiously while the doctor checked my vitals and etcetera.

When he was finally done, Mallory wheeled herself back by me, her food almost gone. I wondered how long that routine took.

"Jacob," my doctor sighed. "You seem much better than you were just 12 hours ago. You're awake, which is a very good thing."

I nodded and waited for him to continue. "And?"

"And nothing," he answered me. "You're going to be just fine. As long as you get into no more fights during this time, you'll recover normally."

He smiled at me and I tried my best to smile back. It was hard with Mallory sitting there beside me with a worried look still on her face. "Okay. Thank you."

"You're welcome," he nodded as he left my chart on the door and walked out the room.

Mallory kept that look on her face. "What's wrong? He said I'm fine and I'm going to keep being fine."

"I know," she sighed. "But it didn't seem like that when I first saw you. I didn't care what the doctors, charts or the machines said. I needed you to open your eyes."

"Well, they're open now." She gave me this look that told me I was stating the obvious. I reached for her hands and placed them on the bed in mine. "Look, you have nothing to worry about, Mallory. I'm not going to go after August again. I think he kicked my ass good enough that I'm not going to be impulsive."

"You say that now," she said with a sad voice. "I know what he did to me was wrong. But I don't want you to go after the guy because of that. He's dangerous. You even told me that. What made you think you should fight him?"

Tears seemed to be forming in her eyes again. "I didn't care about much besides what he did to you," I shrugged. She looked about to protest so I continued. "There wasn't anything crossing my mind that wasn't you laying in the hospital bed. Or you crying over what he did to you. I needed to confront him."

"No, you didn't," she shook her head. "You shouldn't have. Jacob, he could have killed you!"

"And he could have done the same to you."

That stopped her mid-thought. She just looked defeated as the tears slid down slowly. I wiped some off her cheek. She tried to turn her head away but I turned it back to me.

"Look at me," I whispered. She finished the turn on her own this time and stared into my eyes. "I love you. You may have kicked me out but that didn't matter at the time. Someone went after you, deliberately hurt you to get back at me. That's not right and I wasn't going to just let it pass."

"But -"

"No buts," I cut her off. "You matter to me. Period. No matter what the hell's happening between the two of us."

"I know," she whispered. "I love you, too. I couldn't imagine anything past this point if you didn't wake up. I think I may have panicked a little bit."

She chuckled lightly and I followed her. "So how are you feeling? I know it's only a couple days since you got in here."

"I'm good," she nodded, happy the subject was changing slightly. "I'm still in this chair but my doctor says I don't have to keep using it longer. I just don't trust myself to walk."

She smiled at me. She finished the last bit of her food when a nurse came in and gave me my breakfast. I didn't feel hungry even though I hadn't eaten in almost two days.

A little while later, the doctor came and told Mallory she should stay in her own room. I didn't want to let her go and either did she, but she had to take care of herself so I told her to listen to him.

I sat there staring at the walls when a knock came on the door. I turned my head and saw Marlena. She had a baby carriage with her. "Hi."

"Hi," I said back, sitting up. She wheeled the carriage in and I tried to pear in to see my son but I couldn't get a good glimpse of him.

"I thought there's someone you might want to meet," she smiled, stopping the cart and holding a baby when she leaned out of the carriage part. I took a deep breath and saw him for the first time.

His eyes were like mine, the same shape. His hair, the same reddish shade I had but not exactly. I guessed since she was a blonde and I wasn't a full redhead. His eyes were closed but opened slightly when he was held.

"That's him?" I asked even though the answer was obvious.

Marlena nodded. "Do you want to hold your son, Jacob?"

I swallowed hard and nodded. She placed the little boy in my arms as I awkwardly tried to hold him. Marlena fixed my arms to show the right way.

Baby Simon smiled up at me. He was a beautiful baby and it made even harder to believe I was a father now. I thought the first time I see him, I would embrace it but it was still something to wrap my mind around.

"He's amazing," I breathed. And he was.

"He is," she nodded, proud. "I gave him your last name. Since August knows now anyway, I wanted him to have a father's name he could be proud of. Not someone like August."

I heard the words but didn't process them. I just kept staring at my son.

"I have to go back on the road soon," she blurted. I looked up at her surprised. "I know. I shouldn't. But it's my job and Simon's going to have the best care possible there. I'm gonna hire a nanny for when my show's on."

"What about me?"

"You can still see him," she replied. "I'm not forbidding you from your son."

"But what if I came with you and watched him?" It sounded crazy but I didn't know any other way to see him and I didn't like the idea a nanny would see my own son more than me.

"Jacob," she said, serious. "You can't. You have a job nearby. You have a life here. I can't just ask you to do that."

"What if you didn't need to ask me?" I asked back. "This is my son, Marlena. I want to be part of his life."

"Could you leave Mallory?"

Those four words took me off-guard and my mind shot back to the girl upstairs. I knew I couldn't but I wanted to have my son around, too. It was a no-win situation. "I don't know."

"I think we both know you do know," she whispered, looking back to her son in my arms and I did the same.

"But I don't know what to do," I whispered. "I want him to know me. But I feel like I can't just leave her, either."

"I'm sorry you have to go through this, Jacob," she said. "Really, I am. But I don't know what to tell you. You have to make that decision for yourself. I can't just quit my job and try to start over. I wouldn't know where to begin."

"I wouldn't ask you to do that," I whispered. "I just can't make a decision."

My doctor walked in and came in the middle of the conversation. "I have to take you down for some tests, Jacob."

"Okay," I sighed. A nurse came in with a wheelchair for me. I handed Simon back to Marlena and he instantly cried when he was out of my arms. I guess he knows who his father is. That thought made me smile a little until I tried to get off the bed.

The pain shot through my back and stomach like I was getting stabbed. It hurt like hell and I held my lips tight together to try to ignore the pain. It seemed like I was doing a good job so I sat in the chair.

The nurse wheeled me out and I took another glance at my crying son. Marlena was trying to soothe him. I watched his legs kick and arms flare until I couldn't look back anymore.

xxxxxxxxxxx

The tests took longer than I thought they would. I heard the nurse that talked to Mallory when I woke up call my name so I turned back. She walked up to me and I felt bad that I didn't know her. "You don't remember me, do you?"

I shook my head. "No, sorry about that."

"It's fine," she made a hand movement that showed it didn't matter. "I just wanted to tell you something. Mallory is very much in love with you. And I think even though you broke-up, she wants to be with you. I think she was just mad when it happened."

"What if I really screwed up?"

"It doesn't matter," she shook her head. "I watched her sit by your bedside. She told me about you. She asked me to let her stay in your room even though it's against the rules for me to take the patients to another's room."

She chuckled in between but continued. "She said you're here because you went after who hurt her?"

I nodded. "He went after her to get back at me. I betrayed him so he thought he'd make it even by coming after Mallory."

She nodded this time. "I told her you were brave. And that you'd be happy to know she was sitting there with you. Were you happy she was?"

"Happier than any moment in my life," I answered honestly.

"Then tell her you're sorry," she commented. "Tell her you love her. Just don't let her go. I don't think she can take it if she loses you again, especially after these past couple of days."

I nodded, not knowing what else to say. I started to wheel myself away but turned back to face her. "She really told you about me? About why I'm here?"

"Yes," she answered. "She was very worried about you."

I just nodded another time and went back on my way. I stopped in front of Mallory's door but she was asleep. I watched her chest go up and down with every breath she took.

I didn't regret going after August. Not one bit. Just knowing that girl in that room was alive was all I needed. And that bastard tried to hurt her, even threatened her a second time. She didn't need to know that part.

I watched her heartbeat rate and decided to give her some privacy. Someone staring in on her from her doorway was the last thing she needed. Even if I couldn't deny how beautiful she always looked when she was asleep. It was the most peaceful sight I'd ever seen.

I finally went back to my own room and got back on the bed without any help. I winced and made sounds the whole time thanks to the pain. I leaned back on my pillow and closed my eyes, hoping to get some good sleep that doesn't involve being unconscious.

The next thing I remember is eyes on me. There was a light knocking on my door but I didn't want to wake up yet. I was having a good dream where nothing this wrong had happened. Mallory never got hurt and I never had to go after him. She never had to worry about me.

When I finally did turn my head and attempt to open my eyes, I heard a familiar voice. "See? I told you we can wake him."

I officially opened my eyes and saw Mallory's happy smile standing in my door with Lois and Doug by her side.

"Hey," I mumbled groggily. "You guys came to see me?"

"Yep," Mallory smiled brighter as she walked into the room. "I'm out of my chair and Doug and Lois came to visit me. So I thought maybe they'd like to come see you with me."

"How you feeling, Jacob?" Doug asked me, honest curiousity on his face.

"Better, I think," I answered him. "At least I'm awake now."

"Alison was quite worried about you," Lois sighed.

"Ssh…" Mallory whispered to Lois, obviously not wanting her to know how much she did worry.

"Well, you were," Lois whispered back. Mallory just turned back to me and smiled. You could tell from miles away how happy she was that I'm awake and talking now.

The three of them sat down, Mallory coming to sit by my side and absent-mindedly playing with my fingers. Lois caught that and smiled. Nothing was resolved between the two of us but it was good to know Lois was happy we were on a good path.

Doug kept watching me like he was conflicted and worried for Mallory. He didn't like what I did but he couldn't hide how proud he was I went after August for Mallory. Maybe he planned on going after him himself.

We talked and caught up for what seemed like forever but Lois and Doug had to leave. They said goodbye, both hugging Mallory when they left. Lois hugged me, too.

Sitting there with just Mallory made it seem awkward for some reason. Maybe we were too comfortable having these two other people with us just minutes before that we didn't know what to say.

"I think I should be going, too," Mallory sighed. "I'm getting out of here, you know. They're releasing me. Since I'm 18 now, I can sign myself out."

She smiled a little at the end but all I did was worry. Should I tell her about the second threat? "Isn't it too soon?"

"No," she said back. "My injuries weren't that serious and I'm healing good. So I'll be out of here soon."

"Stay tonight?"

"Really?"

Her face lit up when I asked her. "Come on, it's still your birthday for a few more hours. I hardly got to see you today."

"Okay," she agreed. Mallory climbed into the bed and laid down next to me. I moved over to make more room for her and held her close to me, putting the blanket on her, too.

I yawned which ruined the moment. "Shit."

"You can sleep," she looked at me. "I don't mind."

"No, I can stay awake," I assured her. She knew I was lying.

"Sleep," she demanded. "I'll still be here."

I looked at her face for any sign she was lying and didn't find one. Instead of just closing my eyes, I leaned in closer to her and she closed her eyes. The kiss was light and sweet but it felt good to be close that way to her again.

"Since I won't make it to midnight," I explained as I leaned away. "Happy New Year, Mallory."

"Happy New Year," she murmered, eyes still half-closed.

I smiled wide and closed my eyes. It was one of the best sleeps I've ever had in a while.


	26. Aftermath

It felt really fucking cold. I opened my eyes to look for a blanket when I remembered I was in the hospital still. I looked over at Jacob, who was still asleep and just watched him. His breathing seemed even and I sighed in relief that he really was okay.

My mind began to travel somewhere else after my realization hit. Jacob kissed me last night. I didn't know if I was ready for anything like that to start again right now. I wasn't even sure if my feelings were just worrying about losing him. If I had no idea what exactly the kiss meant, did he?

Maybe I was overthinking it all. Maybe he only did it because he knew how crazy I got before he woke up. Maybe he just did it because it's New Years at Midnight and we were the only ones with each other.

Ugh. My mind needed to stop. It never did this before after kissing a guy. It was crazy to get so worked up about it.

I looked over at the clock on the wall and saw it was 7:30 am. Risking another glance at Jacob, I realized he was still asleep. Good. That meant I had time to think even if I didn't exactly want to. My brain tried to process if he mentioned the kiss but I had no responses besides that I liked it.

I know, I'm getting insane.

I leaned my head back down on his shoulder and got comfortable. He began to stir a little when I started drawing circles on his arm.

Seconds later, his eyes began to flutter open and I took a deep breath. I had no fucking clue what was next between us.

"Hi," Jacob half-murmered, still tired but awake. He turned his head to look into my eyes and I looked away. Stupid.

"Hey," I whispered back. I finally turned my head back and caught him smiling. "What are you smiling at?"

"Nothing," he shrugged. "Just that I like waking up and seeing your face."

I felt the blush try to creep on me and I held it back as best as I could. "You're still sleepy. You can't say sweet things when you're still sleepy."

"Okay," he agreed. "Then I'll say it again in a few hours, okay?" I just nodded, not believing he was serious. He started to sit up and I moved to help him. "How long have you been up?"

"Just a few minutes," I shrugged this time. "You didn't miss much."

"That's what you think," he smiled and stared into my eyes again. "Is something wrong? Did I do something or…"

"No," I said as his voice started to trail off. My guess was he didn't know what was happening here either. "You did nothing wrong. Trust me. It's me. I have no idea what's going on between us and it's making me weird."

"You couldn't be weird if you tried, Mallory," he said back to me. He was being too sweet right now. "I don't expect anything, you know. I like having you with me and I know I fucked up. Believe me, I do. But I'm not going to force you to forgive me or some shit like that."

"Thank God," I said sarcastically. "To be honest, I don't even know what I want. I like being with you, too. But I don't think I'm ready to think too far into any of this."

He sighed. "Then I won't push you."

"Really?"

"Really."

I smiled this time, reaching out to twine my fingers with his and be totally girly. "I think you are too good for me."

He laughed and shook his head. "No. You're better than you think. You're the one who's too good for me."

I laughed this time and stared at our hands tied together. "You really fucked me up, you know that, Jacob?"

He chuckled lightly this time compared to his laugh a few seconds ago. "No, I didn't. I think maybe I just brought out a side of you that you didn't know existed. And you have no idea how happy it makes me I was the one to do it."

"I don't think anyone else could have," I whispered, hoping he wouldn't hear me. But I looked back up at him and he was staring even more intent at me, if it were possible.

He definitely heard me.

"Are you sure you're not sure?"

"Jacob," I groaned. "I just need to think. Now that you're not dying, I can try to sort through these feelings. I just need time."

I felt like I was repeating myself and not saying what I really wanted to say. I wanted to tell him I still love him. I wanted to tell him I want to be with him. I wanted to kiss him again so badly. Even more, I wanted to take him home and have the best night of our lives.

But I couldn't do that. I shouldn't.

Instead, all I did was look back into his eyes and sometimes glance at our fingers. His were brushing over mine, as if it was soothing mine. It felt nice and set high electricity through me. It was insane what this man could do to me.

A few minutes passed with us not saying anything. Jacob just watched me and I felt extremely self-conscious. I didn't want him looking at me that way while I was trying to sort everything out. Yet he kept looking at me like he loved me. Fuck him. He was trying to get me back with his eyes or some shit.

"I should get going," I said, my voice speaking higher than it has so far for the day.

"Why?"

"Because I'm released," I answered him. His eyes looked scared. "I should go home, Jacob. I can't stay here with you forever, you know. I have a life." I regretted the words as soon as they left my mouth.

"I don't want you to go," he whispered back to me. I tried to keep my composure but hearing his sad voice made me not want to ever leave.

"I have to," I said as I got off the bed but his hand still held mine tightly, as if he were trying to not let me ever let go. I tugged my hand back but he wouldn't let me. "Jacob."

"You have to promise me something," he said. His voice was still barely above a whisper. I just nodded and waited. "Be safe, all right? August is still in town probably. Who knows what he will do?"

"You're worrying for nothing," I tried to assure him. "But fine. If it makes you feel better, I will be as safe as I can."

"Thank you," he said, letting his hand fall back to the bed and give me mine back.

"Anytime," I nodded as I began to walk out the door. I looked back to him and instantly regretting wanting to leave. "I'll see you later, right?"

"Yes," he nodded with a smile starting to form. "Bye, Mallory." I just nodded again and walked out the door.

Once I passed the first turn to the elevator from Jacob's room, I sat on the floor and just breathed. I hadn't taken a real breath since before he got in the hospital but him waking up yesterday and still being fine today comforted me some.

I finally worked up the courage to actually leave when I saw the nurse who let me stay in his room. I walked right up to her. "Angie?"

Angie turned around and smiled when she saw me. "You're not in your chair. That must be exciting!"

"It is," I smiled brightly. "I'm actually getting released but I wanted to come say thank you."

"For what?"

"For what?" I asked her like it was too obvious for her to ask that. "For letting me stay in another patient's room. It really meant a lot to me to be there when he woke up and that someone cared about me to let me see he was still okay for myself. So thank you."

"Oh," she smiled bigger. "It was nothing. I know what it's like to see someone you love in here. If it was me, I would have been asking the nurse the same thing and it would have meant a lot to me if they did that for me, too."

"Well, it was amazing what you did," I replied back to her. "I know you probably will forget about me, about us, when we're both out of here but I won't. Seeing Jacob was alive with my own eyes made me panic a little less."

"Then that's all I need to hear," she said back. "I'm glad I could help. It's more than obvious how much you love him."

I felt my face grow hot again and I pushed back on it even harder this time. "I do," I agreed with her. "I do love him a lot, more than anyone I've ever met."

"Then do what you can to make every day count, all right?" Angie said to me with the most honest face I'd ever seen. I knew I was right about her. She did care about the patients here.

"I will," I smiled again and nodded back. She touched my elbow in a comforting way then walked away. I must have been interrupting her work.

Finally, I made it out of the hospital and to my house. It was dark as usual but something seemed more eerie than the rest of the time.

"Fuck," I whispered, not knowing why I felt so weird. Getting my keys out and being very quiet, I questioned myself. I had no idea why I felt this way.

The door creaked open slowly but still made little noise. The room was bright due to the morning so I saw Jacob's bag on the floor. Half of his stuff was poured out beside it and that was my first clue.

Jacob wouldn't have done that. He was one of those people that didn't leave messes everywhere. But I looked down at his stuff and around the rest of the room. The picture of us together was gone. I knew I left the frame on the table next to the couch. Someone must be here.

In a quick second before I could react, a gloved hand came over my mouth. I felt the panic rise in my chest but I couldn't scream.

"Guess who?" the familiar voice whispered into my ear. I started to breath even faster and a tear that wasn't there five seconds ago slid down my cheek.

It was August. He broke into my house. My mind thought over a million things. But the one it kept coming back to was that he was going to kill me. I didn't want to be thinking that but there was no other explanation.

He was still waiting for an answer but he just spoke again. "Do you remember me, sweetheart?" I nodded this time, too fast. "Good."

He chuckled and I felt sick. "If you scream, I'm going to go down to the hospital and kill Jacob. So if I take my hand off your mouth, will you be good?" I just nodded again, too scared to move. "Good girl."

His disgusting hand moved off my mouth and he turned me around to face him. "What do you want?" I whispered at him, scared more than I'd ever been.

"Isn't it obvious?" he chuckled again. "I want you to give our little friend, Jacob, a message."

"What is it?" I began to get out.

August just smiled. "That if he ever comes near Marlena ever again, he's going to wish he never met her. That he was never born."

"But the baby -"

"No!" he screamed. "That child will not know him! She is my wife and he slept with her. Do you know what it's like to love someone so much and then this person comes and tries to take them away from you?"

"Yes," I answered, my voice trying to regain strength. "But you can't blame Jacob for that. Marlena was involved, too."

"Because he seduced her," he hissed at me. "He deliberately came after my wife and they made me think that child was mine. It's embarssesing what she did to me! What they did to me!"

"Jacob didn't know," I sighed. He looked at me with his head tilted in thoughts. "He told me he didn't know she was pregnant."

"Do you really believe him?" he asked me, his voice turning softer after the way he last spoke. "Do you really trust someone that would lie to you about stealing another man's wife?"

"Yes," I nodded and he chuckled.

"Then you're more stupid than I thought you were, whore," his voice turned cold again. He turned to walk around the room and I tried to take another deep breath. I just wanted him out of my house. It didn't matter as long as Jacob was safe, though.

"Please, don't hurt him," I pleaded with my attacker.

"Like I'd listen to you," he chuckled for another time, this time more menacingly-like. "You just don't want to lose your sex buddy. Don't worry, I'm sure there are plenty of other men out there who'd go for a stripper."

August looked up and down my body appreciately and I wanted to puke. "You're going to go the jail," I said to him.

"No, I won't," he spat back. "No one is going to believe the two of you."

I felt myself shake the more he was standing in my house. He walked back over to me and put his hand on me. I swallowed back vomit as his hand trailed up and down my body the way his eyes did. When they were done touching me, he leaned in to whisper in my ear.

"You should leave him," he said. "I bet we'd have much more fun than you ever had with him, sweetheart."

"Never," I spat back. "I would never go to you even if me and Jacob are never together again."

He chuckled for the millionth time as he pulled away from me. August backed away to the door and opened it from behind. After nodding at me with a smile, he was out the door but turned to face me when he was in the doorway.

"Remember my message," he half-shouted, making sure I heard him loud and clear. I nodded and shook until the door was closed and I was sure he was gone.

My legs gave out and I melted onto the ground. The tears came spilling out all at once. I promised Jacob I would be safe but here August was in my home. He threatened Jacob. He pretty much felt me up trying to get me to side with him. Like that would ever happen.

I curled into a ball and let the scared part of myself cry herself out. Jacob's clothes were all around me on the floor. Before I could even register what I was doing, I picked up a shirt that was right beside my leg and brought it up to my face.

I let myself breath in Jacob's scent, as if that was enough to keep him safe from that mother fucker. The tears came out harder and I let them.

Time must've passed and I had no idea how long I sat there in my living room, sniffling. There was a light knock on the door that awoke me out of my misery. My head shot up to look at the door. It can't be August. He wouldn't come back so soon and he definitely wouldn't be knocking.

He didn't seem to care the last time.

Slowly, I got myself up off of the floor and walked to the door. I took a deep breath just in case. For all I knew, it was Marlena coming to tell me August went after Jacob in the hospital anyway and he was dead. The last thing I needed was to hear I would never see him again.

Hesitatingly I turned the knob and opened the door. There was a huge sigh of relief when I saw Lois standing there. "Oh, thank God," I whispered to her.

"What?" she asked me with a confused expression. "What's wrong, Allison?"

"Remember that guy who attacked me?" She just nodded. "He was here. When I came home. I stayed at the hospital last night and when I got here this morning, he was waiting for me."

"Oh, my God," Lois whispered to me and pulled me into a hug. "Are you all right?"

"Yes," I nodded into her shoulder and she pulled away to look into my eyes. "Honest. He wanted me to give Jacob a message. That's all, he said."

"Did he do anything to you?"

"You mean, sexually?" She nodded slow and I sighed. "No. Not the way you're probably assuming. He touched me a little bit but nothing serious."

"Okay," she whispered. "I believe you. I'm going to tell Doug, though."

"Don't, please."

"Why not?"

"Because you know Doug," I answered. "You know what he'll do. I don't want anyone else getting into a fight with that dick over me."

"You have to tell someone besides me," she said back.

"Fine," I sighed. "But not Jacob. No way in effing hell am I telling Jacob about this. He'll go crazy and he just got into the hospital. I can't do that to him."

"He's only trying to protect you, Allison," she said to me. "That's not a bad thing, you know?"

"I know," I nodded, my head turning to not look her in the eyes then back again. "I just don't want him to go after him again, especially not after last time."

"Okay," Lois agreed with me. "But Doug's going to be coming soon so I think you have something to share with him?"

I groaned. Just in time, Doug came at the door a few minutes later. Lois eased me into the subject and I blurted it out.

"What?" Doug exclaimed, standing up the second the words left my mouth. "He came after you? Here, at your home?"

"Yes," I said in a small voice. It was not good when Doug was angry. "But he didn't hurt me. It was just a message, that's all. I'm fine."

"It is not fine," he said through his teeth. "This bastard came to your house, waited for you to come home. I wonder how the hell he got your address in the damn first place!"

"Doug," Lois tried to calm him down but it didn't affect him.

"That asshole isn't getting away with this, you know," he said. "We're gonna get the cops, everyone on his ass. He won't be free much longer. Someone comes after my family, they've gotta come through me."

It struck me when he called me his family. I never actually heard those words out of his mouth before even though I assumed it and he'd been pretty close to it at other times. I put my mind back on what was happening at that moment instead of staying in my little personal thing inside my head.

"Don't do anything stupid," Lois scolded.

"Please don't," I agreed with her. Doug sat down and tried to calm himself down again. He took a few deep breaths and seemed fine.

The conversation tried to go back to normal. They were getting ready to leave a couple of hours later and I was almost grateful. I really needed a shower.

When the Riley's were standing in the doorway, ready to leave, Lois leaned in to me. "Do you want us to stay here?"

"No," I said back as she pulled away. "I'll be fine here, Lois."

"Do you want to stay somewhere else?"

"No," I shook my head. "I think maybe he's gone this time."

I said the words but didn't believe them myself. But I held a brave face as the two closest people I had to parents just nodded and looked concerned then left. Lois waved on the way to the car.

I sighed and sat on the couch. The picture being gone really annoyed me. What did August want with that picture?

I dialed my phone and called the hospital. I needed to make sure Jacob was all right. Some woman answered and I asked her to call his room. She transferred me and I sat there in silence, waiting for his voice.

"Hello?" Jacob's voice said over the phone. I couldn't find my voice to answer it. "Hello?"

I hung up the phone in a panic and took another deep breath. He must have been confused but at least he was safe. I walked into my bedroom, got some clothes out and took a much needed shower, hoping some of my worry will fade down the drain with the water.


	27. Where could my baby be?

The dial tone rang began just as quick as the phone call. I sat there with the phone in my hand and confused. I had no idea who had just called me but maybe I did. It could have been Marlena, or Lois, Doug. Maybe it was even Mallory. But I shook my thoughts away and put the phone back on the receiver.

My usual nurse, Gina, peeked in my doorway. Her smile was happy and like she was hoping to get off early tonight. "How you feeling, Jacob?"

"Fine," I nodded, anything to not have to talk about my injuries. "Do you happen to know who just called me?"

"Um," Gina's face turned upward like she was thinking about if she knew. "I don't remember hearing about a phone call. Why? Do you know what nurse picked it up?"

"No," I shook my head this time. "It's just there was nobody on the other end. Or maybe they just didn't want to talk anymore."

"Oh," she half-smiled. "I'll ask the nurses at the desk if you want."

"Nah," I shrugged. "It's fine. You don't have to do that. But thank you anyway."

Gina just nodded and smiled again one more time before walking out of my doorway. A half a second later, she peeked back in. "I almost forgot. There's someone here to see you, Jacob. Do you want any visitors?"

My mind flashed to Mallory and I instantly said yes. "Sure," my face lit up. "Let them in, Gina."

She nodded again and urged someone forward. My thoughts were abruptly interrupted when I saw who my visitor was.

August.

He walked in with a snide smile on his face and a bag. I couldn't think of what he would bring a bag to the hospital for. There was no way he could kill me here, at least. But why was he here?

Gina walked away and August watched her go, obviously checking her out. "Hmm," I heard his voice say as his face turned back to mine and he walked in the room. "Maybe I should get in here. I'd love to have some cute nurses taking care of me."

"What do you want, August?"

"I came to see you, Jakey," he grinned wider.

"You don't give two shits about me, August," I sneered at him. "Now, what are you doing here?"

"I'm hurt," he faked and place a hand over his heart. "I came to see if you were okay and you don't believe me? That's hurtful."

"Not when you're the one who put me in here."

"Is that the way to talk to an old friend?"

"You and I were never friends," I answered him. "Even when I started. I'm not stupid, August. I know you never were my friend."

"And I'm not stupid, either," he leaned closer to me from his seat. "I knew there was something going on between you and my wife."

I swallowed any reply I was ready for and went back a few paces. "I'm not going to apologize for that. Anything you've done is worse than that so there's not much I can say to you?"

"You can say 'Stay away from the stripper'," he grinned again. "Isn't that what you want me to do?"

"What did you do to Mallory?"

I was furious now. The mention of Mallory from his mouth made me want to vomit and jump out of this bed and kill him. But he never stopped that shit-eating grin while I waited for an answer.

He still didn't say anything.

"I said, 'What did you do to Mallory?'"

My rose higher and he just chuckled. "Nothing, honest. I just paid her a little visit."

"How? You're not allowed back at the club," I said back, hoping this didn't mean what I thought he meant.

"I waited for her at her house," he answered calmly. "It took her a while to come home, though. I bet you had fun at your little hospital sleepover, huh?"

"You sick bastard," I hissed, my voice growing louder. "What did you do to her?"

"I said nothing," he put his hands up in fake defeat. "I just told her to give you a little message. And if she wants you breathing, she's going to do it as fast as possible."

"That call," I whispered, not even talking to him. "It was Mallory calling me about you."

"Aww, she called?" he half-squeed in fake excitement. "That was so sweet of her. But I'm guessing from your face, she didn't say much."

"She hung up," I said a little louder than my previous whisper. "Why am I even believing you? You could be saying this just to piss me off and get me worried."

"Really?"

He sighed and pulled a squared object out of his bag and then turned it to face me. The picture. It was the frame from Mallory's table next to the couch of the two of us. She never moved that thing or took it out of the house. There's no way he would have gotten that without knowing where she lives.

"You mother fucker," I spat at him. I didn't care who heard me at this point. I couldn't take my eyes off of that picture. Mallory was so happy in that picture. She was smiling and laughing, leaning onto me. I hoped he didn't hurt her again.

"No need for harsh words, friend," August laughed. Why did he always have to laugh? "I'm just showing you the proof. You know this picture was beside her couch. It's too bad I didn't stay longer. She looked ready to jump in the shower or something."

"You stay the fuck away from her," I spat another time. "If you ever go near her again-"

"Aha!" August clapped. "There's the words I was hoping for. Now, I'll stay away from your little whore if you stay away from mine. Got it?"

I nodded, tasting the vomit in my mouth at the thought of him anywhere near her. He just smiled and tucked the picture away in his bag. I watched as her framed face disappeared and looked at him again.

"I should get going," he shrugged and stood up. "Now, remember my message and everyone will be fine, all right?"

Another nod from me but this time, I spoke. "If you _ever_ come near her ever again, I swear I'll kill you."

August just laughed and walked out of the room, happier than when he came in. I thought frantically about Mallory and if he hurt her and didn't tell me. Who was I kidding? August never told the truth.

Suddenly, my phone rang and I looked at it. It was Marlena and I just let it ring. I wanted to answer it. Something could have happened with Simon. And she was still my friend even if we weren't together anymore.

But I ignored it. For all I knew, August was screening my calls and knew she was calling. Or worse, he went after her, too and was calling me with her phone as a test to see if I would really stay away.

The phone finally stopped ringing and it beeped with a message. It was a risk in the first place that I even had my cell phone on in here in the first place. They weren't exactly allowed and the nurses would probably try to get me in trouble.

It was too bad I wasn't good at charming my way out of trouble.

I shut the phone off, hoping Mallory, Lois or Doug wouldn't try to call me. I didn't want to miss any calls from them but any more calls from my son's mother and I might answer it.

Instead of stressing too much over it, I leaned my head back onto the pillow for a while. I closed my eyes and began to wonder about Mallory again. She had to be fine. August might not actually attack her again especially after he beat me up. I was the one he wanted to hurt but he also knew how easy it'd be to kill me by doing anything to her.

I instantly shot up from my pillow and didn't want to think about it anymore. I needed to see for a fact that she was fine. I started pulling the wires out of me and turned to get off the bed. My nurse had left the wheelchair I'd previously used in here but I didn't want to be obvious.

I limped off of the bed and went to change into the clothes I had when I was brought in. I was thankful they weren't too bloody. Someone must have washed them. _Lois_, my mind thought. I was going to thank her when I got out of here.

Limping my way out of the room once I was dressed, I checked for my nurse or doctor. They were nowhere I could see so I walked right out of the room. I made it to the elevator and got in as fast as I could. No one was in there with me and that was good.

After what seemed like forever, I made it down to the lobby. I had no idea how I was going to get to Mallory's house. I had no car here. I had no one picking me up. I searched around and saw a taxi pulling in to bring a couple in.

I ran as fast as I could over to the taxi and got in. After giving them Mallory's address, I looked through my pockets. I sighed in relief when I saw my wallet was in there, none of the money ruined. Lois must have put it back in there for me.

Finally, we reached Mallory's house after twenty minutes. I paid the guy what was owed, not caring about the overprice and got out of the car. I stared at the house and took a deep breath.

I limped a little bit up to the door then knocked. No answer. After knocking another time and still not getting an answer, I pulled her key out of the hole. The door creaked open and no one was there.

"Mallory?"

I called her name, hoping I'd get an answer. Still nothing.

"Are you here?" I asked the silent air. "Mallory?"

I walked further into the house and still no sign of her. That couldn't be a good thing. I noticed there was still steam on the mirror in the bathroom so she must have been in there recent. I sighed in happiness but not exactly getting the comfort I needed.

My bag was now in the bedroom, I noticed. Mallory must have put it in there since I had it in the living room. I changed into another pair of clothes and hoped the time passing would mean she would come back.

An hour passed and still nothing. I turned my phone back on and saw the message sound beep from Marlena's message. There were no messages from Mallory but I dialed her number anyway. I heard her machine and the beep. I hung up, not knowing what to say and what that wouldn't worry her if she really was fine.

I decided to see if her neighbors knew where she was. I walked out and remembered Tara, the friend she told me about before. Maybe she would know where she is.

I knocked on Tara's door after locking up Mallory's and she came right to the door. "Yes?"

"Do you know where Mallory is?"

She seemed confused and I felt stupid for not saying who I was sooner. We had never met before so of course she'd be confused. Especially if she knew what was going on.

"Why?"

"I'm Jacob," I confirmed. "She's not home and I was wondering if you knew where she was?"

Tara took a deep breath then smiled. "Oh, thank God. I've been waiting to meet you. I'm Tara. She's inside here."

"Hi," I smiled back, happy to have met her and to know where Mallory is. Tara leaned to the side of the doorway and I saw Mallory sitting on the floor playing with a little girl. An older boy sat on the couch just as amused as them. I guessed he was the little girl's brother.

Mallory's face looked up to see who was at the door and she broke into a beautiful, heartbreaking smile. "Jacob."

She stood up and almost ran to me before wrapping her arms tight around my neck in a tight hug. "I was worried about you."

"I'm fine," she breathed. "I came over here to try to stay around people without bothering Lois and Doug. But now I guess I can go home since you're here." Mallory pulled away and looked at me. "But why are you here? Shouldn't you be in the hospital?"

"Yeah," I answered her. "But can we talk in private?"

"Oh, sure," she nodded. "Tara, thank you so much for letting me stay here. Bye guys!" The little girl excitedly waved at her and the boy smiled like he was too old for the waving thing. It was almost entertaining to watch.

Tara shut the door behind us and Mallory grabbed for my hand as we walked down the front path. "You were worried about me?"

"August came to see me at the hospital," I explained. She groaned beside me but I continued. "He said he paid you a house visit and to prove it, showed me that picture of the two of us."

"So that's what he did with that," she sighed. "I knew he took it but I had no fucking idea why."

We turned off the sidewalk and up her path. I needed to ask the most important question. "Did he hurt you?"

"No," she answered. "Surprisingly and thankfully. But I was pretty spooked and Lois and Doug came over while I was, so I decided to go over to Tara's for a little bit. He didn't know we were friends unless he was watching me a lot longer."

"I thought he took you or something," I half-whispered, not wanting to admit why I was scared. "He kept saying he wouldn't hurt you but I didn't believe him."

"No, I'm fine," she faced me after she pulled the key out. "Don't worry, all right? I have you here with me now. I've got nothing to worry about."

"Even if I escaped from the hospital?"

Mallory chucked. "Wow. I didn't expect that. But seeing you now, I didn't think they'd seriously let you out."

I laughed with her. "I guess that's true. But you can take care of me now."

Her smile became brighter. "I can be naughty nurse?"

"The naughtiest," I agreed. I leaned in to kiss her but she pulled away. "I'm sorry. Was that wrong?"

"No, no," she shook her head. "It wasn't wrong. I'm being stupid."

"No, you're not."

"Yes, I am!" she shouted as the front door flung open and she went inside. I followed after her. "You almost died to defend me and I can't get over my feelings being hurt that I have to think about it? I'm so stupid, Jacob."

"No," I grabbed her arms and placed them at her sides. "You need time to think. That's a normal thing. I prefer it over a flat-out 'no'."

"I don't think it'd be a no if I wasn't thinking it through," she whispered.

This time, Mallory leaned in and I had no time to think about it. Her lips were over mine as fast as possible. In another flash, I was kissing her back. It wasn't rushed but slow. It was kind of just what we needed at the moment.

My hands released Mallory's arms to put them on her waist and her hands went up to my coat. She slid it off and I heard the thud as my jacket hit the floor.

I pulled away to look into her eyes. It wasn't lust I saw in them. It was love. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah," she breathed and her scent went right into me, causing me to kiss her again. Clothes came off one by one and in no need to go fast.

When we got to the bed, I winced as my bruises didn't react to the actions as well as other parts were. Mallory noticed. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," I said through my teeth. "It just hurts more than I thought it would."

"We don't have to do this, you know," she whispered. "We can wait."

"I want to," I said.

"No," she answered. "Tonight, let's just sleep, okay? No rush, just sleeping."

"Sleep," I agreed as we went into a more comfortable position and I held her close to me. She nestled into my chest and closed her eyes.

"I love you, Jacob," she said loud enough to let me hear.

I smiled as I leaned in closer to her. "I love you, too, Mallory."

I closed my eyes with the smile still on my face.


	28. Back Together

**I think the story's going to end soon. There might be a few more chapters but I'm going to try to make it last as long as I can without going past my plans for it. I am really gonna miss writing this story. I hope everyone reading it likes it as much as I did writing it **

It was much too quiet. I was used to the beeping sounds after a couple of days in the hospital. A part of me believed last night was just a dream and August had done something to Mallory when he came to visit her. But I could feel someone, her, in my arms. Even with my eyes closed, I knew it was her.

I started to open them and peeked at the dark hair beside me. Mallory's head was lying on my chest and I saw the blanket move up and down to show her breathing. I fully opened my eyes and smiled at the girl beside me.

I didn't think I'd ever have this again. I thought I lost her for good this time. I wanted to wake her up and my ribs didn't exactly like the weight on them but I ignored it. My ribs may not have liked it but my heart did.

Mallory sighed deeply in her sleep and I waited for her to open her eyes, too. Instead she just stirred and held me closer to her. I wrapped my arms tighter around her and even let myself sniff her hair to make it more real. I laughed at myself for that part.

Her head turned, her hair tickling me and she leaned her head up to me. Mallory's green eyes opened and she smiled a breathtaking smile at me.

"Hey," I said to her. "I was hoping you'd wake up soon."

"Were you up long?" she groaned, probably embarrassed.

"No," I chuckled. "Just a minute or so. But I was hoping we could do a little more of what we did last night before we went to sleep."

"And your ribs?"

I looked in her concerned eyes and realized there was no need to worry. "I'm fine. We don't have to do that, exactly. But I kinda like the rest of the parts, too, you know."

Mallory's face went down to hid in her hands. "You make me wanna blush." I laughed because it seemed like she had the same effect on me. "But in a good way. I don't see how exactly we're gonna be good at not fucking since we're both already naked, though."

We both laughed this time as I remembered that she was right. Lying here with her, I could forget anything. Even the fact that I was really cold even with a blanket on.

"That's true," I chuckled again when I got to speak again. She blushed this time and hid her head even more. "But how about we eat first, then keep at what we were doing?"

"Sounds good," she agreed, her head coming up out from between her fingers. She sat up and the blanket fell, causing me to forgot any thoughts. I looked away and tried to compose myself. She giggled. "Oops."

Mallory grabbed a shirt and a pair of short shorts and put them on only to climb out of the bed once she was dressed. I searched for something to wear but found nothing. She walked back into the room before I even noticed she was gone with a pair of boxers and pants.

"Looking for these?"

She held them up high and I decided to tease her back and climbed out of the bed, too. She couldn't hide her blush definitely when I did that but instead of turning away, she checked me out. "Like what you see?"

"Oh, yeah," she nodded, still looking me up and down. I smiled as I put them on and the pout on her face was very obvious. Later, I thought.

I walked into the kitchen with her behind me. "What am I making?"

"Just eggs," she shrugged, sitting down at the little table. "I'm really hungry and I want breakfast to be over so we can get to that other part."

She made a suggestive look with her eyebrows, causing me to swallow hard and want the same as she did. It had been too long since we had been like this.

I started to crack open the eggs and Mallory watched me with some intense concentration. After a few minutes with her still staring, I got a little curious. "Am I doing something interesting?"

"No," she shrugged again. "It's just – you're gonna laugh but you make everything seem so fucking sexy."

I chuckled and almost felt my own blush appear but held it back. "That's because I learned from the sexiest person there is." I pointed the spatula at her as I took it out of the drawer. She gave a 'who, me?' look and smiled. I just nodded and went back to what I was doing.

When the eggs were done, I brought them over to the table. She grabbed the fork and started to eat before I was even seated. She knew I was giving her a look and she stopped. "I told you. I'm really hungry."

"I noticed," I said as I sat down with her and ate my own food. "Are they good?" She nodded and gave me a thumbs up.

Soon we were both done eating and just sitting at the table. I watched her bring the dishes and forks to the sink and thought about our next conversation. I knew we needed to talk but I didn't want to ruin what we might have right now.

She came back to her seat and I took a deep breath. "Should we talk about what's happening with us?" So much for subtle.

She sighed. "We should. Do I really want to? Not exactly. But before we do anything more, like get naked again, we should at least figure this out."

"Okay," I leaned over the table to focus all on her. "So what happened with me and Marlena."

"Pass."

"You can't pass," I told her.

"Yes, I can," she nodded. "I don't want to think about you and Marlena. I don't want to talk about you and Marlena. I don't want to end up with images of you and Marlena sleeping together, or you and any other woman for that matter."

"That'll be easy then," I replied. "There was no other woman I've ever been with like that besides you and Marlena."

"Honest?"

"Cross my heart." She smiled in relief. I didn't know why she doubted that. How many people did she think I was sleeping with when I was gone? "We don't have to talk about it, though. I just want to say I'm sorry."

"I know," she said. "Really, I do. You don't have to apologize anymore about that. It was a big deal for you and you didn't want me to know about one of your most ashamed moments."

"I didn't," I added. She watched me as I spoke. "I never knew about Marlena being pregnant. If I did, I probably would have done more to help her. It might have meant not coming back here and I don't know if I could say that was better. Because this way, I have both of you in my life."

"But I would have told you," I continued. "If I even had the slightest clue about it, I would have told you."

"I know that now," she whispered. "But when I found out, I was upset. I was really fucking pissed off. Can you blame me for kicking you out?"

"No, I can't," I shook my head.

"But I think I can get past it," she breathed. "You're a father now. That just means I'm splitting my time with a baby. It's fine. It doesn't mean I love you any less. If anything, it means I love you even more."

"So you're not mad anymore?"

"No," she beamed. "I'm not mad. I just wanted you to only love me. I couldn't accept you being with someone else. But I'm over it. Now I think of how awesome of a stepmom I could be."

Her mouth shut as soon as she realized what she said. It was the first time I'd actually heard her say something like that. My heart wanted to burst at that word but I decided not to embarrass her any more than she was.

"What does this mean, then?" I pointed my fingers back and forth between the two of us to let her know what I was talking about. "Are we back together?"

"I want to be," Mallory answered me. "I just need to know if there is anything else in your closet that's going to come out and hurt me again."

"There's nothing else," I answered her this time without any hesitation. I knew there was nothing else that was as big as fathering a child.

"Good," she nodded and smiled. "What are we going to do about that dick, anyway?"

"I don't know," I said honestly. "I don't really know what we can do. But I'm not going to let him hurt you or come after you ever again."

Mallory just smiled and stood up, coming over to sit on my lap and twisting our fingers together. "Then I'm glad I have you in my life."

She leaned in and kissed me gently at first. I felt all the tension rush up and the kiss became deeper. My free hand went to her lower back and held her more to me. Hers went into my hair and tangled it with herself.

The deeper the kiss became, the more I wanted to rip her clothes off. Mallory started giggling and she couldn't hold it anymore and broke us apart.

"What is it?" I asked her, wondering why the hell she started giggling in the middle of a make-out.

"I feel my friend poking me," she barely got out between giggles and looked down at my pants. I could tell somewhere else on me was happy to be back with her and that she was sitting right beside it enough to feel it.

"He really missed you," I breathed as I leaned in to kiss her again. She kissed me back with the same passion as before she stopped.

"I really missed him," she said as she pulled away. My lips didn't want to leave her so they roamed her face and down her neck. Her hands tugged at my hair and she let out a moan.

Her hands traveled to where her friend was and I felt the blood shoot straight there. My thoughts were being controlled by that one part now.

Mallory unbuttoned the one button and pulled the zipper down. My mouth went back to hers as I tried to muffle the groan that come out of mine. She put her hand on me, only the boxers she handed me between us and moaned again.

I couldn't take it anymore. I lifted her up with my hands on her butt which caused her to giggle and placed her on the little table. "Would this break with two people on top of it?"

"I don't think so," she panted. "But it depends on what they're doing, I guess." I stared into her lust-filled eyes and climbed on top of her. My lips instantly rejoined hers and we began what was a fantasy of mine since I first saw her house.

Her hand stayed glued to my dick, making it harden even more. My hand crawled up her shorts and felt the heat. She groaned at the frustration. I could tell she wanted my hands in there already. I decided to tease her a little bit and my hand went to her stomach instead.

It crawled inside her tank top and inched its way to her breasts. I heard another moan escape her lips as my hand began to go around it and never actually touch it. Her hand that was in my hair came out of it and she took my hand and placed it on her breast, making me grab it.

I pulled away and her eyes were closed. It was funny how she could make me feel her up with her eyes closed. I chuckled as I let go of her breast and pulled her shirt up. I kissed everywhere on her chest. Her head threw back and if I could see her eyes, I bet they would have rolled to the back of her head.

I gave up on trying and lifted her shirt off of her head. She smiled with her eyes still closed. Her two hands went to my pants and started to tug them down. I helped her a little, causing her to open her eyes. I didn't see hesitation in them at all. I looked at the amazing woman underneath me and just felt relieved. She was mine. She wanted to be with me and made me proud.

Once my pants were off, she started working on the boxers, trying to tug them down, too. I helped her and felt free when they fell to the ground. Mallory, on the other hand, still had her shorts on. I was mad as hell at them and undid the strings. She knew what I was trying to do and leaned up so she wasn't exactly on the table. It was enough for me to get them off of her.

We were both fully naked now and I couldn't stop kissing her. I wanted to get to that next step but I just couldn't tear myself away from her lips. She put her hands on my ass, digging her nails in, causing me to groan. I had to be inside her already.

I readjusted myself one more time and connected with her. She moaned and this time, I saw her eyes roll back when we joined. I moaned along with her as I went in and out of her.

The table felt as if it couldn't take anymore so I pulled myself out of her, aching them because I missed the feel of her. I lifted her into my arms and she kissed my neck the whole way to the bed and I practically threw her down in the nicest possible way. Instantly, I climbed over her again and started kissing her all over again.

Her hands pulled me closer, wrapping me in her arms. I couldn't wait any longer and pulled myself inside of her again. I watched her head go back on the pillow and smiled to myself. Finally, she came and I felt home. I came right after her and we laid there, panting and smiling. I put my arm around her and she moved to lay her head on my chest.

"I love you, Jacob Jankowski," she breathed, placing kisses on my chest.

"I love you, too, Mallory Carter," I breathed along with her.

We both fell asleep soon after that, just holding each other close.

**This chapter is short. I know. But I had this big plan to write more but then I started writing this scene and I couldn't add anymore. It's a lemony-smutty type of chapter and I didn't think anything I had planned to write could compare or fit with this. So for now, it's a short one but the next update will hopefully be longer. **

**Leave a review?**


	29. The news

"How do your ribs feel now?" I asked Jacob hours after we tested my kitchen table's limits. But I had to admit, it was definitely fun.

"They're okay," he shrugged. I could tell he was lying but hiding it. I kept drawing circles on his chest then looked back up at him with a knowing look. "Really. I am fine."

Jacob kissed me quick then leaned back down on the pillow. "You're not trying to make me feel better about what we did so soon after you were in the hospital?"

"In case you forgot," he started, staring me in the eyes. "You were just in the hospital, too. So I should be asking you how you feel."

Shit. I was caught. But I had nothing to hide at least. "I actually am fine," I smiled. "More than fine. I'm ecstatic and happy. Besides, my injuries are pretty much healed or gone."

I saw Jacob's face wince before my sentence was even finished. I quickly assumed it was something wrong with him but then I realized I mentioned injuries.

"Fuck," I whispered. "I shouldn't had said that like that. But you know what I mean, right?"

"Yes," he closed his eyes and slowly opened them again. "But I'm thinking I made a mistake today. Maybe we moved too fast this morning. I shouldn't have done that-"

"Sssh," I placed a finger on his lips and held his mouth together. "That was not a mistake. I don't care about moving fast. We did in the first place." He tried to protest against my finger but I continued. "I love you. I am 100% fine. It didn't hurt, all right?"

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

The nodding of my head didn't seem to convince him but he kept his eyes open this time. He just put his arm around me and pulled me closer, tracing the same circles I was on my bare back. It felt nice so I closed my eyes and let myself feel comforted here with him.

A few seconds after I closed my eyes, the stupid phone started ringing. Jacob said my thoughts out loud. "We really need to unplug that shit."

I groaned along with Jacob and grabbed a robe. With August creeping around, I didn't feel comfortable walking around naked.

"Hello?" I answered when I finally picked the phone up. Hmm, it was on the floor in the dining room now. I didn't remember putting it there.

"Hello," a female voice said on the other end. Who the fuck was calling? "Is this Mallory Carter?"

"Yes," I hesitantly replied to the unfamiliar voice.

"I'm from New Orleans General," she explained. "And I was wondering if you knew a man by the name of Jacob Jankowski? He left the hospital last night and he wasn't supposed to be released yet."

"Um, yes," I said, pausing at my words. "I do know him."

I looked over at Jacob who was still laying in my bed. I didn't want him to have to go back but I also wanted him to be okay. He saw the confused look on my face and put something on. Before the woman could speak again, he was standing beside me.

He was one fast dresser.

But he was an even faster undresser.

_Concentrate_, I thought. "Are you looking for him?" I swallowed my doubts and asked.

"Yes, we are," the woman confirmed. "Have you seen him since last night?"

Jacob looked at me, also confused. I mouthed _'it's the hospital'_ to him and he nodded. A look of sadness came over his face as he realized he might have to go back in.

"Miss?"

"No," I shook my head violently, the phone and my hand along with it. "No, I haven't seen him. But I'll call you if I do."

"Okay," the woman sighed, obviously annoyed she hadn't found him yet. "Thank you, anyway, Miss Carter."

"Okay," I said then hanging up the phone.

"You told them I'm not here?" Jacob asked me as I placed the phone down. He looked confused. As if I'd turn him in after this morning. "Why?"

"I don't think I'm ready to let you go yet," I whispered.

I felt Jacob's arms come around my waist even though he was still on the side of me. His nose touched my cheek. "Me, either."

"Do you think you should go back?"

"I don't know," he shrugged then leaning his head on my shoulder. I turned my head slightly and we were staring right into each other's eyes. "I feel fine. But I just don't know what's right here but I want to stay with you."

"I want that, too," I said in my still small voice. "But are you sure you're fine? I don't want something happen to you because I didn't turn you in to the hospital immediately."

"Nothing is gonna happen to me," he kissed my shoulder. "Now come back to bed."

"I will," I nodded but my feet stayed planted where they were.

"Mallory?"

He moved his head off my shoulder and took a step back as if that act would encourage me to move again.

"Have you ever watched Golden Girls?" I asked, the randomness of the question sounding dumb as soon as it left my lips.

"No," he shook his head. "My mom used to watch it but I never saw it. Why? What does that have to do with anything?"

"Well," I begun, turning to fully face him as I spoke my crazy thoughts. "There was this character, Rose. She was a widow. And…the way her husband died was…well."

"What?"

"He had a heart attack during sex," I blurted so it sounded like one long-ass word.

Jacob started laughing. "You think if you come back to bed, I'm going to die? Mallory, that is insane. Don't think like that."

"I know it's stupid," I mumbled. "But you were unconscious. And we just had sex three times this morning. Once on a table. I'm just trying to be smart, you know. I don't want to lose you."

"You won't," he put the best smile he could on his face then began playing with my robe strings. "I'm not ready to leave, anyway. Just come back to bed with me?"

"Okay, yes," I agreed. He led me back to the bed and just held me close. He was trying to ignore my fears and I let him for a little while then falling asleep minutes later.

The next time I woke up, it was 11:15 and the bed was empty. I looked around the room but it was too quiet. "Jacob?"

I got off the bed and walked around my small house looking for him. When I got closer to the front door, I heard whispered voices. I leaned on the door but couldn't make out exactly what was being said.

Sighing, I opened the door slowly. Jacob heard the quiet creak and turned to face me. He was now dressed in jeans and a t-shirt. He obviously had been up a little while. He pointed his index finger out to tell me one minute. I waited.

"Yeah, I'm glad you called," Jacob said to whoever he was on the phone with. "I'm sorry I didn't get to chance to tell you sooner."

A few more pauses while he listened to the other person. I wondered who called him. I knew that much at least since he said it. Marlena? I couldn't be sure. It sounded formal. It must not have been Lois or Doug either. His friends, maybe.

"Wow," he breathed in relief. "That's fantastic. Thank you." Another pause. "When?" Pause. I felt nosy so I leaned up quick to kiss him on the cheek then walked back inside. Jacob watched me as I closed the door.

I quickly went back to the bedroom and pulled out some clothes. Jacob was still outside on the phone when I looked again so I went into the bathroom to take a shower. I definitely needed one after a morning like this one.

I turned the water on hot and let it pour over me. I closed my eyes and let it take me over. I had no idea who Jacob was talking to or what it was about. It didn't even have to be my business. But I was too curious for my own good.

It was driving me crazy that he was having some secret conversation outside right now. I wondered if he'd even come inside when it was over. For all I knew, he would stay out there and think a while about it.

I poured the shampoo into my wet hands and started washing my hair. What if it was Marlena? What if she told him she wanted him back and that was the only way he could see his son?

No. She wouldn't do that. I knew her. Sure, I didn't know her well and definitely not as well as Jacob knew her but it didn't seem like she would threaten him. Marlena seemed like a nice person. There was no way she'd keep a child away from his father because he didn't chose her.

My thoughts were going fucking insane. I scrubbed the shampoo out of my hair and head and felt the suds fall down me. Who else could it be? I re-thought the words I heard outside. He was happy someone called him, someone he was supposed to call sooner. And something was happening at sometime.

It wasn't much to go on. I was clueless. I grabbed the soap when my hair was clean and started scrubbing myself instead of thinking. I focused on the task and ignored anything based on that phone call. Or Jacob's hot ex who happened to be the mother of his first born child.

The shower was over and I dried myself fast, getting dressed just as fast. I opened the door while trying to dry my hair and saw Jacob sitting on my bed.

"Hey," I said, bringing my hand down that was holding the towel.

"Hi," he smiled. Something was definitely up. "I bet you're wondering who I was talking to out there."

"No," I shrugged, passing it off. I didn't want him to know how crazy I had become since I'd met him. "Was it Marlena?"

"No," he shook his head and took a deep breath before standing. "It was actually my boss."

"Oh," I said so low I wasn't sure he heard me. "What'd he say?"

I remembered the word 'fantastic' and reminded myself it couldn't be that bad then. "Well, I don't have a job in Baton Rouge anymore."

"Shit," I said louder. "I'm so sorry, Jacob."

"Yeah, well," he said. "I do have a job in New Orleans, though."

"What?" I exclaimed. My face lit up in a huger smile and his did at the same time.

"He said that it really seems like I belong here in New Orleans," he answered. "That maybe it'd be better I recover here. And also there was this other guy that transferred to another hospital so there's a job opening here."

"Oh my God!" I screamed, too happy to hold it in. I jumped at him and wrapped my arms around him in an instant. His arms came around me and he laughed in relief.

"You're happy?"

"Definitely happy," I nodded into his shoulder. I pulled away and looked at his face. "I love you so much."

"That's good because I love you, too," he said back as his lips crashed into mine. He started playing with the loopholes of my jeans and made me want him all over again.

We started walking backwards until he fell on the bed first. I came crashing on him second and we burst into laughs that soon turned into more kissing.

We must have been making out for a half hour, not letting it turn into anything naked for the fourth time today. There was a knock on the door and I was scared it was August. Jacob sat up on the bed and looked at the door.

"Do you want me to answer it?"

"What if it's him?" I asked. "I don't want him to hurt you again."

"And I don't want him hurt you," he replied back. He kissed me one more time and stood up off the bed, walking straight to the door.

"Jacob?" A familiar voice asked him when he opened it. "What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be in the hospital?"

"I kind of left," he shrugged. "How are you, Lois?"

"Good," she answered him. I sat up and tried to see her better. Quickly, I jumped off the bed and fixed it up. I didn't want it to look like we'd be in it all day even if it was the truth. "Is Allison here?"

"Uh, yeah," he answered. "She's just—"

"Right here," I finished his sentence for him and walked to the door. Lois looked me curiously like she suspected what we were up to. "Hi, Lois."

"Hello, Allison," she said very formally. It was almost weird. "I have an update for you on that August."

I swallowed hard and could see Jacob had done the same thing. He spoke first. I was too afraid to think what could be next. "What is it?"

"He's been arrested," she replied.

"What?" my mouth blurted without thinking. "What happened?"

"Doug paid him a little visit," she said with her eyes looking everywhere all at once. "He called the cops ahead of time about what this guy had done to the two of you and how he threatened his own wife. No one wanted to believe him but he wore a wire. They seemed fine with arresting a beaten up man."

"Doug beat him up?"

I waited for the answer to my question impatiently. "Yes. He went after him last night. It wasn't that long after we saw you. Doug was fed up with that man going after you. The both of you and he called Marlena up to find out where he was."

I blew in a breath of relief. "Thank God."

"So he's in jail?" Jacob spoke again. "He's not going to come after Mallory again?"

"Or you," I half-mumbled to him. He ignored it and was more concerned about me. It was insanely sweet.

"From what I hear, he's going to be in there a while," Lois explained. "I don't think you two need to worry about him anymore."

"Thank God," I repeated again and hugged her. When she let me go, I wrapped my arms around Jacob and hugged him. He kissed my head and held me close to his chest.

"I should get going," Lois sighed. "Doug's still talking down at the station. I'm his ride home but I wanted to update you face-to-face."

"Thank you," I said to Lois. She just smiled.

"Yeah," Jacob said. "Thank you, Lois."

"Anytime," she just smiled wider. "I'll see you two later?"

I nodded and she turned to leave but turned back to face us a second later. "Are you two – are you-? Nevermind. It's none of my business."

She turned back around. "We are," I answered her, smiling brightly and tightening my hold on Jacob. "We are."

Lois just smiled and nodded. "I'm happy for you two. Really, I am."

"Thanks," Jacob said to her and she walked away for real this time. We watched as her car left the space in front of the house.

I turned to face him once the car was out of sight. We just stared at each other in the doorway and didn't speak.

"Let's celebrate," he finally spoke when we walked back in. He didn't have to tell me twice. And we continued where we left off before Lois came.

The next day, Lois and Doug came back. Doug was helping Jacob move his stuff back here from his place in Baton Rouge. It was a pain for Jacob to get out of his contract on the place but he did it somehow. I will never underestimate his charming skills.

Lois and I offered to come with them but they said it'd be easier with two people because then there'd be more space in the car. Doug insisted they both take their own car. It made me even more confused to why the two of us couldn't come.

"Okay," Jacob said in between kisses, with the Riley's watching us by their car. "I really have to go now."

"One more minute," I mumbled as my lips went back to his.

"Jacob!" Doug yelled. "We should get going."

Jacob pulled away from me and gave me a long look. "I love you and I'll be back before you know it. Trust me."

"I do," I put my head down then back up again. "It's just I don't want to go through the missing you part."

"You won't even have time to miss me," he replied, kissing me again then walking down the sidewalk. "I'll be back tomorrow!"

"You better be!" I yelled back as he got into his car. He smiled again and it caused me to break into a big smile. Lois and Doug gave each other a quick kiss then he was in his car, too. Before a minute passed, the cars were both started and pulling out. I waved again and so did Lois as she walked up to me.

"I guess you two really are back together," she chuckled as she reached where I was standing.

"Yep," I laughed a little myself. "We really are. And it feels even better than the first time. And the first time felt _really_ good."

"Okay," she laughed. "No details. I just like seeing you happy."

"Me, too," I nodded as she put her arm around me and we walked inside.

We spent the morning talking and she asked me for details of my newly renewed relationship. Around 1pm, Lois went food shopping and I knew that took her a while so I decided to make an errand of my own.

I drove to the address I had stored in my mind. I wasn't sure she would even still be there but I went anyways and knocked on the door. She opened it and was surprised to see me there.

"Hi, Mallory," she said to me.

"Hi, Marlena," I said back. "Can we talk? I know you're leaving soon but I needed to say something."

"Okay," she nodded, letting me into the room. We sat on the couch as she waited for me to start. "What do you want to talk about, Mallory?"

She was obviously upset. I didn't take it personal since it was probably due to her husband and the news I got from Lois.

"Thank you," I said to her. She looked confused. "Thank you for letting Jacob into his son's life and for not forcing him to decide what to do. I'm really glad I met you and I hope you don't disappear from my life, too."

"Did Jacob tell you what we talked about?"

"Um," I stuttered. "No. No. What was it?" Was he keeping something else from me?

"I told him I was bringing Simon with me when I leave," she answered me. "He hasn't told me a decision yet. It was between you and his son. I don't know what to do here because I haven't heard an answer yet."

Shit. I thought about the job offer. Was he choosing me over his son? "He got offered a job here, in town. But he hasn't told me about that, no."

"Can you ask him for me?"

"Sure," I nodded. This conversation made a new turn for me. "I think I should go, actually. I have a short time now and I said my thank you. So I guess see you sometime?"

"Yeah," Marlena said. We both stood up and she hugged me. I hugged her back and was glad to be on good terms with her. If there was a future truly there for me and Jacob, I knew we needed to be okay, too.

We said our good-byes and I stood in the hallway after she shut the door. I wasn't sure of anything enough to make me believe Jacob would chose me over his own child, no matter how much he loves me. I took a deep breath and pushed that thought aside and went home.


	30. Coming Home

**FINALLY! I get to update again. Jersey had all these power outages this weekend and I wasn't able to come write a chapter or update the story even if it was written already. But here we go…**

This was becoming a longer drive than it ever seemed. I'm trying to drive in front of Doug Riley's car, to lead the way to my soon to be old apartment. I could sense the conversation coming as soon as our job was finished. Doug was going to tell me to never hurt Mallory again. I just knew it.

I took another deep breath as I turned on my signal and onto another highway. I saw his car follow me in my rearview mirror. I knew we weren't far from the building and that didn't make trying to convince him I was done hurting Mallory any easier. But I hoped I'd be able to do it right.

At least I hoped the words wouldn't all ramble together.

Another 15 minutes passed and we were finally there. I pulled into the parking lot and found a spot not too far away, hoping to delay the coming threats. Doug's car pulled in a minute later and found a spot not too far and not too close to mine. I got out and waited for him to come to me.

"How was it following me?" I joked with him when he reached where I was standing.

"It was fine," he shrugged. I could tell he wasn't up for small talk but just to help me pack then threaten me if I ever did anything to make Mallory upset ever again. I swallowed hard, knowing this was going to be a long day.

"Okay," I answered almost under my breath. "My floor is the third so at least even if we use stairs, it won't be too bad."

"That's good," he agreed. We walked into the building and went straight for the elevator. Obviously, that was the better choice than getting extra walking in to move me out.

The elevator ride was quiet and uncomfortable. I didn't understand why exactly he was so mad at me but I tried to. I knew I fucked up. That part was obvious. But he did like me at some point so maybe he would understand that I didn't mean to by not telling Mallory about Marlena.

But looking over at Doug again, I knew it was a low chance of that happening.

The elevator stopped at my floor and we both got out. He didn't ask me what apartment it was but just followed behind me, trusting me.

I unlocked the front door and flicked on the lights. The place was a mess. I had stuff thrown all over the place. I must not have noticed all the clothes I threw around when I heard Mallory was in the hospital.

"Sorry about the mess," I mumbled. "The last time I was here was when I heard August went after Mallory. I didn't care much for cleaning as I did about getting out of here."

"It's fine," he said to me. "If I was here, I would have done the same thing, hearing about what happened to her…if I could, I would have killed the guy with my own two hands."

"Me, too," I whispered but I knew Doug heard me. He looked over at me in understanding for the first time since me and Mallory broke-up. I could tell no matter if he hated me, why he hated me, he still respected me for wanting to protect her. That was a good place to start.

He started to walk around the room, seeing what he could pack up. I had a question I really wanted to ask him and it felt like time to ask it. "What happened?"

Doug turned to look at me again. "What happened when?"

"When you went after him," I swallowed. "When you got August arrested. Did he say anything? Did he do anything?"

"He admitted going after her," he said in a low voice, turning his head away and starting picking up a box on the floor and putting stuff in it. "He found it funny that she screamed."

I winced. "Anything else?"

"He said that you betrayed him," he continued, facing me another time, looking me right in the eyes. "He said you slept with his wife so you deserved to hurt like he did. I told him I didn't think it was possible for him to love someone. But he just laughed and said that was you."

I processed the few sentences. It felt weird having Doug repeat what I already knew. I tried not to be judgmental, knowing this was my fault just as much as August's and motioned for him to keep going. I had to be able to listen to it.

"He heard Mallory talking to Marlena in the hospital," Doug began again. "That's how he found out you were with her. So he followed her and later that day, he went into the club to see where she was. He pretty much sought her out to give you a message that he can easily take someone from you just like you did to him."

"So he was stalking her?"

"He said it wasn't stalking," he answered me. "He said it was only to find out where she works, if she worked. But he said finding out she was a stripper – that it was a jackpot because, and I quote this 'That means Jacob found himself a whore and I can have some fun with her while I get him back'."

I wanted to puke. I felt so disgusting that he thought of Mallory that way all because of something stupid I did. I couldn't regret my time with Marlena because that brought me Simon but the stupidest part of all was pissing off an angry, temperamental man.

"That's sick," I half-mumbled. "It makes me sick that he saw her that way. She's not like that at all. It was her only option. She had no family."

I felt my head shake back and forth and I wasn't sure who I was talking to anymore. Doug blurred out from my vision and I was only scolding myself, telling myself she was more than that.

"I know," Doug agreed, snapping me out of my lonely world. "That's the first time I hit him. After he said that. He just bounced right back up and laughed. Like it was some kind of game. He obviously didn't care about her at all. All he saw was a young girl he could prey on while getting revenge on you."

"I could kill him," I replied to him. That was the nice alternative, anyway. He deserved far worse than that. "I could just fucking kill him."

"I know, I know," Doug nodded. " I could, too. That girl – the one you're in love with and he went after – she's like a daughter to me. She filled this hole in me that losing my daughter formed. She let me feel like life was worth it and even meeting her helped me gain my wife back."

"She told me you're like a father to her," I said to him. His head snapped back at me with a very calm look. "That's how she talked about you. You really mean a lot to her, you know."

"I do know," Doug smiled. "And she means a lot to me, too. And to Lois. I don't know if she knows it but we'd do anything for her."

"So would I," I agreed.

"Good," he chuckled. "You better. I don't want to have to come after you, you know? I think I had enough big fights and hospitals for now."

I laughed with him and we began packing. I went into my bedroom and stuffed some clothes in boxes and suitcases. Doug worked on packing up the living room.

My phone rang when I was about done with the clothes. I raced to the main room and Doug was already holding my cell phone in his head with a huge smile on his face. I walked over to him and grabbed the phone, seeing it was Mallory calling me.

"Hey," I flipped it open and went back into the bedroom.

"Hey," she said in an almost hopeful voice. "How's the packing going?"

"Good," I nodded though she couldn't see me. "It's going good. I just packed up all my clothes."

"You know," she started. "If you really come live with me, you won't need any clothes."

I could feel the shiver go all through me as if she were whispering into my ear. "I think it's safer I bring them."

"Fine," she gave up. "But I usually get what I want and I want you. So you figure that one out."

I swallowed hard and closed my eyes tight, thinking of what to say next. I decided to change the subject. "So how is it in New Orleans without me?"

"It's sad," she answered me. "I miss you."

"I miss you, too," I said in a low voice. I didn't want her to know how much even if it was a short time.

"Are you almost done packing?"

"I think so," I answered, looking back at the living room to see Doug making progress since my phone call began.

"What does that mean?"

"It means…" I paused. I wasn't even sure why I said that. "I think it means that I want to be done and come home already."

"Sounds nice, huh?" Mallory laughed. "Come home. I can't wait to have you move in with me, Jacob."

"Me, either," a smile came on my face. What she does to me. "I love saying that."

"I love hearing it," she said and I could tell she was smiling. "I should get going, though."

"Oh," the surprise got to me. "Why already?"

"The sooner I get off this phone," she whispered even though it was just over the phone. "The sooner you can get home and I get to rip your clothes off of you."

Shit. I could tell I was going to be hard just from that sentence and knowing what she wanted to do as soon as I came home. I swallowed for the millionth time since we got here.

"I'll call you when I leave?"

"You better," she beamed. "I love you, Jacob."

"I love you, too, Bye."

And we hung up. I sat on the bed and willed myself to forget what she said. To not think about that. Like I really needed that type of situation with Doug in the other room. Especially what besides that phone call could have made me like this? I thought of everything that would turn me off.

Thankfully, that worked though. I started to pack again. A little while after my phone call from Mallory, Doug walked in. I had the majority of my bedroom done.

"You want to order some food or something?" he asked me.

"Yeah, sure," I nodded. "I could eat."

Doug just nodded and pulled out a phone. "Any pizza places around here?"

"I got the numbers by the fridge," I said back to him. He went into the kitchen and pulled the papers out of a pile, leaving only the pizza places.

He ordered a pie of pepperoni pizza for the two of us. The guy said it'd take 15 minutes so we went back to packing. This time I helped with the kitchen and packed up bowls and utensils.

The pizza guy came a few minutes earlier than he'd said and I was grateful. The break felt needed and it was cheap so that was lucky. My stomach agreed with my head and growled when Doug paid the delivery guy.

We each got a piece and I chewed slowly, dreading any talk. And hoping if there was any, then it wouldn't be about my intentions or something like that.

"So you and Mallory are going good now, huh?"

I looked up from my food to watch Doug's face as he asked that question. He didn't look mad or angry. Hopefully, it wasn't going to be as bad as I feared.

"Yeah," I confirmed. "We are. She was amazing when I was in the hospital. She told me I was stupid for going after August, but she was pretty good to me."

"So you two are officially back together or something like that?" He chewed slowly as he waited for my answer.

"We are," I nodded and couldn't help the smile that formed on my face. "I wasn't sure what we were but she told Lois we were. It kind of confirmed what I was hoping for. I don't know what I'd do without her, you know?"

"I do know," Doug nodded with me and smiled but it soon faded. "And what about your ex? And your son? How does Mallory fit in with this fatherhood life you have now?"

"I haven't told Marlena what I'm deciding yet," I answer ashamed. "She told me she wants to take Simon with her. But that means I won't see him often. I also know I can't just leave Mallory either."

"Why not?"

"Because I love her," I answered without a second thought. "Because I'm in love with her. I don't see much of a future for myself without her in it. So it all depends on whatever she wants from me and us."

"It's nice to hear you say that, Jacob," Doug said to me. "I always thought if Mallory did find some guy, it'd be some asshole coming after her and who thinks she's weak because she works in the club. Or even that he'd only be with her for the money she makes when she works. But you're none of those things, are you, Jacob?"

"No," I shook my head and took a few more bites of my pizza. "I don't think I am. I wouldn't abuse her or use her because of what she does. And I have my own money. I wouldn't go after her just for cash, either."

"That's another good thing to hear," Doug smiled. "I'm glad she found you. Even if you were stupid enough to keep an affair from her. Especially one that led to you being a father."

He laughed lightly and I did the same. I knew he was joking. "Thanks, I think. As long as you approve, I guess everything's good. Mallory doesn't like to disappoint you."

"She doesn't need my approval," he stopped laughing and was serious again. "She just needs to be happy. I don't care as long as she's fine, happy and taken care of. That's all I ask for for her."

"I can help with those things," I said to him, the same serious tone to my words as was in his.

"I think you already have," he replied low. I just nodded back and we went back to eating. It didn't seem like any more needed to be said at the moment.

After five hours since we came here, it seemed like we had everything packed up. The place was empty besides the couch, bed and a couple of tables. Doug and I decided to bring them down to the cars and see what we can fit.

It all fit besides the couch and bed. _Maybe I could tie the bed to the top of my car_, I thought to myself. It'd be nice to bring Mallory home a new bed. _Imagine what we could do on it…_No. My mind needed to stay on the right track so I ignored that trail of thought.

Doug helped me tie it to the top after I suggested it. I didn't know what to do with the couch. Doug told me he had a plan and went off somewhere. I stood around clueless for a few minutes.

"I found a guy who can bring the couch if you want it still," he said to me when he came back. "He's got a pickup truck and he's traveling to New Orleans."

"Seriously?" I asked him, skeptical. "That's great. It's funny you found someone who just happened to be going to where we are."

"Don't be sarcastic or whatever the hell that is," he scolded me. "The couch needs a ride. I got it a ride."

"Thanks, Doug," I said honestly.

The guy came a couple of minutes later and I found out his name was Allan. He didn't look like an Allan but I didn't comment. Me and Doug helped him get the couch in and we soon got on the road. I was just happy to be leaving this place behind and go home to Mallory once again.


	31. Decisions

It was weird driving in the front. Doug suggested I take the lead home and he'll follow not too far behind. I tried to keep my thoughts straight as I pulled onto the roads. Allan was not too far behind me either. Just one car behind Doug.

In a half an hour, I'd see Mallory again. Any separation from her seemed horrible and too long. It didn't matter this one was only five hours. I just wanted to see her already. There were a few texts after the phone call but I needed to see her. Everything was always better when she's with me.

I looked in my mirror and saw Doug concentrating on the road but I knew he was worried I'd fuck up again with Mallory. It didn't matter what I said about never hurting her again. Because I didn't mean to hurt her in the first place but I did anyway.

I turned on the radio to try to ignore any negativity. I just wanted to go home already.

The time passed and I turned onto Mallory's roads. It was dark and I thought maybe she wasn't here. Pulling in front of her house, I saw a dim light in the back of the house that looked like maybe the bathroom.

Doug pulled in behind me, Allan behind him. Allan got everything ready to pull the couch off the back of his truck.

"I think I'll head in first," I said to Doug as I walked over to him. "Make sure we're not bothering her or something."

"Okay," Doug just agreed. "I'll help Allan get the couch out for you."

"Thanks," I nodded and walked up to the front door. Pulling the key out of its hiding place and turning it in the lock, I noticed how quiet the house was. Was she even home?

I walked in and turned on the light in the front room. The only sounds I heard were my feet on the floor until I walked further.

"Fuck!" I heard Mallory's unmistakable voice coming from the bathroom. I half ran to the door and knocked then opening the door. "Shit."

She held her hand over her heart in shock. "I'm sorry."

"You scared the shit out of me," she said. I looked at her and noticed she was only wearing a towel and she was sitting on the toilet, holding her leg.

"Are you okay?" I asked her, staring at the hand held on her leg.

Her eyes followed where mine were and she chuckled. "Yeah, I'm fine. I just banged my leg when I was coming out of the shower. There's kind of a bruise forming."

She moved her hand off of her leg and showed me. It was really red but not exactly black and blue yet. "Does it hurt?"

"A little," she shrugged. I could tell she was lying and it hurt more than a little. My hand reached toward her and I touched her sore leg. She watched me as I poked and gently touched it in concentration. "What do you think?"

"I think you're gonna be fine," I smiled, looking up at her. "But maybe you should get dressed because Doug's here."

"He is?" she gasped.

"A some guy named Allan who helped me bring my couch."

"Okay," she gave me a funny look. "But why didn't you tell me? I can't look like this when he sees me! Or that random guy either. Wait. Is he cute?"

"Hey," I playfully scolded her. "You're my girl."

"Damn straight," she said as she leaned in and give me a soft kiss. "Okay. Go. I need to get dressed."

"What?" I chuckled. "I've seen you naked. Why do I have to go?"

"Because Doug might need help," she said as she pulled away from me and stood up. I watched her, not wanting to move. "And because we don't want to get caught up and then he walks in…you get the idea."

"Yeah, I do," I nodded and stood up myself. "I'll tell them they can bring my stuff in?"

"Sure," she smiled. "Just wait a few minutes. I don't want anyone besides you seeing me naked, okay?"

"Yes, ma'am," I saluted. I walked out of the bathroom and turned back to see her in the doorway. "For the record, I don't want anyone else seeing you naked either."

"Noted," she nodded and smiled.

I turned back around and starting walking to the front door. It amazed me how happy and relaxed I could get in a few seconds that I see her.

"She here?" Doug asked me the second I got outside.

"Yeah," I nodded. "She's here. She said we can bring everything in but we just need to wait a few minutes, all right?"

"Sure," Doug answered me.

"Do you guys need anything past the couch?" Allan asked the two of us. "I mean, do you need any help moving things?"

"No," I shook my head. "I don't think so."

Doug gave me a look. "You could help us get the couch inside."

"Yeah, sure," Allan agreed. "I can do that."

After a few seconds of silence, Mallory came out the front door. I saw Allan take an obvious gulp. He couldn't have her. She even agreed she's mine.

"You guys can come in," she smiled.

"Hey, Mallory," Doug said as he walked up to her and hugged her. "Where'd Lois go? I thought she was with you."

"She wasn't feeling well," she answered him. "And she didn't want to bother you. I can't remember exactly what time it was exactly."

"Oh," he said as he pulled away from her. He seemed like he now had worries on his mind. "Maybe I should go to her…"

"You can go," she assured him. "If your wife needs you, you don't have to stay here. I have Jacob and that guy." She turned to Allan then. "I don't know your name. I'm sorry about that."

"It's Allan," he replied to her. "It's fine. It's not like we ever met before, right?"

"Right," she laughed. "Do you guys want anything to drink?"

"Sure," I answered her and walked by her, putting my arm around her.

"Doug?" she asked him.

"I think I'm gonna get going," he answered her. "I'll come back later, okay?" Mallory nodded and he walked away. I felt kind of bad for him even if it wasn't a serious thing. His car started and he was out of there before I could blink.

"Hey, Allan?"

"Yeah?" he looked at me when I asked him.

"Could you help me bring the couch in?"

He nodded and we both went to grab an end of it. Mallory walked in first and told us a spot in the living room we could put it in. It was a good thing she didn't have much furniture to start with.

The damn thing was heavy. We set it down exactly where she told us to and I was too relieved to think of much else. I felt very weak after carrying that thing. Mallory sensed it and smiled. I smiled back at her.

Allan left and he told us we owed him nothing. It was a relief and I shook his hand for helping and also for driving here with something for us. I was surprised we found a nice guy to help us instead of some creepy stranger. Especially after what we just went through with someone I already knew.

I sat down on the new couch in exhaustion when Allan left. Mallory came over and sat on my lap. "Was that heavy?"

"No," I lied. "It was fine."

She giggled. "You forget I can tell when you're tired out." She leaned her head on my shoulder and I just put my arm around her. "Welcome home, Jacob."

"It's nice to be home," I answered her. "I like being with you too much to ever not be again."

"That's a good thing," she sighed. "Because I kind of feel the same way."

She leaned up to look at me and I kissed her. Her eyes closed the second she leaned in and it felt like home, being that close to her. Her hands started roaming on me and down my chest. It almost sounded like she was taking deep breaths.

"Didn't you say something about needing to rip my clothes off when I got here?" I whispered in her ear, hoping she felt the same things I was feeling at that moment.

"I did," she whispered, her eyes still closed. "But I think you have something else you need to be doing right now besides that, Jacob."

"Like what?"

"You need to talk to Marlena," she replied. "I went to see her when you were gone. And you still haven't given her answer for what you're doing. Are you staying here or are you leaving?"

I could hear the sadness in her voice when she asked me that questions. I even felt it when I thought about what I had to do.

"I know," I replied, sitting straight up, taking her with me. "I just can't bring myself to admit what my decision is."

"What is your decision?" she asked me, opening her eyes fully and starting to draw circles on the side of my hand.

"I wanna tell Marlena first," I sighed. "Is that okay with you?"

"Yeah," she nodded, obviously hating that idea. "It's fine."

"Are you jealous?"

"No!" she exclaimed. "Why the hell would I be jealous that you have to talk to another girl?"

"Maybe because she's mother of my child?"

"Ugh," she groaned under her breath. "I hate being reminded of that. It just means that some other woman is forever connected to your life and I'm not going to be the mother of all your kids."

I kissed her when the last word left her lips. "What?" she chuckled, surprised when I pulled away.

"You want to have kids with me," I answered matter-of-factly.

"Oops," she hid her face but I saw the blush anyway. "Fine! Yes, I said that. So what if I did? Maybe you've turned me into such a mushy little girl and now I think about my future. I think about wedding and babies. And just maybe I think about all of that being with you."

I kissed her again and she chuckled against my lips. My hands held her face still and close to me. I never wanted this moment to end but I knew she was right and I had somewhere to go.

"I should get going," I said to her as I pulled away. My hands were still holding her face.

"Okay," she whispered. "Go. The sooner you go, the sooner you come back to me. Because no matter what your decision is, I will be here for you and I know you'd see me before you left if that's what you decide."

"I love you," I said to her before kissing her one more time.

She giggled. "I love you, too. Now go. Before I regret telling you to leave."

I nodded and smiled like an idiot. I picked her up by her butt and placed her on the couch. She just giggled more and I was really not wanting to leave. Instead, I walked to the door and she waved so I waved back.

I got in my car thinking about my decision. I love my son, that part was obvious. But I also love Mallory. That part was possibly even more obvious. I knew what I wanted to do but it didn't seem right to come to that conclusion.

I reached Marlena's in not that long of time. She answered on the second knock. "Hi," she said to me when she opened the door. "Is this the talk I've been waiting for?"

"Depends," I answered her. "Is that the talk about whether I stay here or come with you?"

"That's the one," she forced a smile. She stared at my face for a few moments. "You don't have to say it, you know. I can tell all over your face what you're gonna do."

"How?"

"Come on," she chuckled. "You love her. There's nothing I can say or do to convince you to come with me."

"But it's not like that," I replied to her. "It's not like I'm choosing between the two of you. I'm choosing between the three of you."

"But she wins."

I knew she was right. I had decided I wanted to stay here with Mallory but I hadn't exactly figured out how.

"Yeah, she does."

Marlena sighed. "I'll do everything I can to visit often. I mean, I don't know how much times that's going to be but I can try."

"Seriously?"

"He's your son, Jacob," she answered me. "I'm not going to keep you from him. I probably would have told you sooner if I knew how to contact you. And with August in jail, it means it's easier to tell you the truth."

"I'm gonna try to come see you guys as often as I can, too," I said back to her. "I'm gonna come see your shows. Watch him when you're on. Anything you need."

"Thank you," she smiled. I heard a baby wail in the other room. My heart tightened at the thought of leaving my son and not being with him. "He's up. Do you wanna come hold him?"

I felt frozen thinking of not being there for him. I snapped out of it when she asked me the question. "Yeah, sure."

Marlena walked into her bedroom and came back out with Simon. He seemed bigger and he smiled when he saw me. She handed him to me when she got close enough to.

"Hey," I smiled at my son and spoke in a whisper. "I'm your daddy. Hey, Simon. I'm your dad."

Marlena smiled as she watched the two of us. "He really likes you."

"The feeling's mutual," I said, still staring at my son in my arms. He started to grab my fingers and play with me.

The time went really fast. I had spent three hours at Marlena's, talking about old things and catching up. And also playing with my son. He went to sleep after hour two but then she just talked about things he can do so far in such a short time.

"I should get going," I said, noticing what time it was. "It got late."

"Wow, it did," Marlena agreed as she looked at her watch. "I guess you should. Tell Mallory hi for me, okay?"

"I will," I said as I nodded and stood up.

"We're leaving tomorrow, at noon," Marlena said as she stood up too. "Will you come?"

"Sure," I smiled at her. There wasn't much I wouldn't do at this point for her and Simon. "Same place?"

She nodded. I waved to her and she did the same then I walked out the door. I took a sigh of relief that she took it so well that I was staying and also that I'd still be in my son's life. It felt like everything was falling into place.

The drive to Mallory's seemed like forever because I couldn't wait to see her again. The house was dark like the last time but I thought maybe I took too long so she left. I parked and went into the house, noticing her right away.

Mallory was asleep on the couch I had just brought with me today. My stuff was all in the bedroom, placed nicely around the floor to not crowd the room. I pulled down the sheets on the bed and went back to the living room.

I lifted up Mallory and brought her close to me, carrying her to the bed. Once she was in it, I pulled the blanket up on her to make sure she wasn't cold. I went in the shower real quick then crawled in beside her when I came out.

I wrapped my arms around her and held her close to me, closing my eyes. "Jacob?"

Her voice reopened my eyes but hers were still closed. "I'm here."

She just nodded and smiled, leaning into me even closer. And we both fell asleep fast that night.

**AAhhh! I think I only have a couple of chapters left in me! I'm so sad to see this close but hopefully just more possibilities are coming for me to write **


	32. Feels like Home

**I didn't want to write this. I've been dreading it because there is one chapter left in this story. Also I've been distracted on a semi-related topic of Breaking Dawn Part One coming out – the promotion and the movie are at fault. Haha. It's probably obvious I like that if I'm combining the lead's characters in something else. LOL. **

**But I'm back. Not for long with Just Like a Circus but for at least two more chapters, I'm back. And here we go.**

A week had passed since Marlena left New Orleans. I thought maybe my awkardness around her would go away when she did but still it was here. I felt like Jacob still loved her and he wanted to be with his son. I felt like he chose to be with me but he wanted to be with them too.

I walked to Tara's house with my thoughts on speed. A week. You'd think I'd be past this by now. Walking up the stairs, I took a deep breath and knocked on her door.

"Yeah?" Tara asked as she swung the door open then she was stunned to see me. "Mallory. I thought you'd be with your man right now. Aren't you two back together or something?"

"Yeah," I chuckled. "We are back together, actually. But I just wanted to talk to you actually."

"Sure. What about?"

"How to get un-jealous," I sighed.

She gave me a look. "What are you jealous of?"

I sighed again. "Jacob has a son. And his ex is…hot. She's gorgeous. And he loved her a whole fucking lot. She left a week ago and she's really sweet. I know he loved me but I just can't stop these stupid voices in my head."

"Okay, you need to sit," she instructed me and pushed me inside.

"Are your kids here?"

"No," she shook her head. "They're not. But important for you, where is your boyfriend?"

"He's at work," I smiled. It felt like such pride having him in town with me when e was working, even if my thoughts tended to go fucking crazy.

"So…" Tara started. "He has a son. How old is he?"

"He was just born a few weeks ago," I answered her. "And it's insane. He didn't even know his ex was pregnant. So I shouldn't be crazy like this. And she's gone anyways. What would it matter?"

"If it bothers you, then it matters," she said to me. "Look, sweetie, you love the guy. He loves you. But you need to talk to him if it's still bothering you."

"I know," I agreed. "But he's gonna think I'm this silly, young, stupid girl."

"No, he won't," she assured me. "He won't think that. He's going to think you love him too much to lose him. And he's gonna be happy to tell you for the millionth time how much he loves you."

"You think?"

"I know."

"Thanks, Tara," I smiled at my friend.

She smiled back. "Anytime."

I let a few hours pass until I realized it was around 4 pm. Jacob would be home soon so I told Tara I had to get going. She smiled and wished me luck, hoping I'd get some courage I usually have for my new problem.

Jacob was walking up to the front door when I closed Tara's door shut. He heard the door and looked across to see me.

"Hey," he smiled when he noticed I was outside. "

"Hey," I smiled back, not helping myself.

I practically ran up to him and wrapped my arms around him. His arms held me close to him and I felt home. I hugged him tighter and then he chuckled.

"Are you okay?" he asked me, pulling away a little bit. "You seem upset. What is it?"

"Nothing," I shook my head violently. "Nothing is wrong. I'm just happy to see you again."

"I'm happy to see you, too," he smiled. I leaned in and kissed him soft on the lips. He kissed me back but I had something I needed to talk to him about.

Well, two things but I needed to get one other thing out of the way first.

I took his hand and led him up to the front door. He twined his fingers in mine and rubbed my knuckles, as if he were soothing me from whatever was wrong.

We got inside and I sat down on the couch he brought home with him. He sat on the floor in front of me. It felt like he needed to plead with me. It felt wrong.

"I have to tell you something," I said trying to look at his face but not wanting him to know what I was leaving out.

"Okay," he said. "What is it?"

"I want to go back to work," I scrambled in one breath. Jacob looked at me like he was thinking hard. Like he wanted to tell me no but he couldn't.

"Why?"

"I need to work again, Jacob," I sighed, almost dragging on my words. "You know that."

"Yeah," he agreed. "But why there?"

"It's my job," I answered confused. "Where else would I work?"

"I have an idea," he hesitated. "And I don't know if you'll hate me or love me for it."

"What kind of an idea?"

"I might know of a job for you, Mallory," he replied. "It's an assistant job for some other guy in the building. I don't know them all yet but there's an opening. I know he's not a perv and you just need to be able to make coffee and answer phones."

"Assistant job?" I repeated to myself. "Assistant? What makes you think I can do that job, let alone get it?"

"Because I believe in you," he smiled and took my left hand in his two. "Because I love you. I know you deserve more than dancing for those guys and I want to be able to help you get there."

"It's sweet," I sat there thinking. Could I even pull that job off? "But…how? Do your bosses know we're dating? Is that even allowed?"

"No, they don't," he answered me. "They don't need to know personal details like girlfriends or wives. Maybe. I'd have to check. But I didn't say anything to them. And my bosses wouldn't be the one giving you the job anyway. It'd be Dr. Maine."

"That's his name?"

Jacob nodded. "Just think about it, all right? I know you deserve more than this. And what if some guy like August comes in? What if we're too late? I can't take the risks with you."

I sighed. "I'll think about it. Okay? That's all I can promise. And August? I don't think you need to worry about that. I'm much more prepared now."

"Do you expect that to happen again?" he questioned me, half-joking but the other half serious.

"I did," I sighed and whispered. "When he was free. I did expect it. Or that I'd lose you. But I wasn't going to let him hurt you so I readied myself. I kind of taught myself to fight. And got a gun."

"You got a gun?" I nodded. "Mallory."

Jacob stood up from his seat and sat down beside me instead of the floor.

"Mallory," he repeated my name. "I don't want you to get hurt, either. Do you even know how to shoot a gun? Use it?"

"Maybe," I shrugged.

He sighed, annoyed. "We're getting rid of it."

"No," I disagreed. "I want to keep it."

"Who even sold you a gun?" he asked me. "You're underage."

"I have a very good fake ID," I laughed. Jacob laughed with me, easing some of the tension. He put his arm around me and kissed the top of my head.

After a few minutes of sitting there with him, I tried to stand up but his hand stopped me. "Where are you going?"

"I have to quit my job, don't I?"

Jacob burst into a huge smile. I knew he was more happy I wasn't going to be taking off my clothes for random strangers. I was kind of happy about that too when you really think about it though.

He let me make my call and I went back and sat on the couch with him. His arms opened for me and welcomed me back.

We watched tv and had a peaceful night. I laid in his arms and was very happy. I slept like a baby whenever I was with him.

The next day was the meeting. Jacob arranged it for me before he even told me about it. I went in and met the guy. He was pretty nice.

The meeting went good. I could tell the guy had hated the previous people he had to interview. He really seemed to like me. I hoped he'd never been to the club and saw me there. I'd die if that was why he liked me.

I went back home and Jacob apparently had some errand to run. I walked in the empty house and saw a message light flashing. I dialed the number after listening to the message.

"Lois?" I said when I heard her answer. "You called?"

"Hi, Allison," she said to me. "I was hoping I could talk to you. Jacob texted me you have a new job?"

"He told you?"

"He's proud," I heard the smile in her voice when she said that.

"I don't even have the job yet," I said to her. "I don't. He's just confident."

"You should steal some of that from him," she joked.

I laughed lightly at her and she did the same. "Where is he?"

"Out," I replied. "I have no idea where. Are you guys going to come back here to visit here soon?"

"I don't know, sweetie," she sighed. "We just got back. But I'll check. See if me and Doug can come. We both have work."

"It's fine," I started staring at the floor, sad. I missed them. "It's okay."

"Are you okay, Allison?"

"Yeah," I nodded though she couldn't see me. "I am. It's just weird sitting here by myself. I feel like I'm going crazy without him here."

"You'll get through that," she smiled. "Trust me."

I just listened to her and we talked for a little while. Jacob was back a few minutes after the two of us hung up.

"You're back," I beamed. It was girly but who the fuck cared anymore? I was girly now.

"Yeah," Jacob smiled back at me. "I had to go pick up some food for dinner. We're celebrating."

"I didn't get the job yet," I said to him in a don't-overreact-and-then-I don't-get-it tone.

"You will," he smiled. "I also had to make a phone call to Marlena."

"Oh," I said. It was the first word to pop into my head. "You didn't want to call her in front of me?"

"It's not like that," he said as he walked more in and put the bags in the kitchen then coming back to me. "I just didn't know how you'd feel about that."

"I'd feel less weird if you didn't hide it from me," I answered honestly.

"I'm sorry," he said. I walked up to him and wrapped my arms around his waist.

"It's me, okay?" He looked at me confused. "I'm a freak. I get jealous. You have this hot ex and a baby with her. Then you go off and call her when I'm not with you, I get weird. I feel like you're hiding something from me."

"I'm not," he answered, wrapping his arms around me, too. "I wasn't sure how you'd feel about me calling her because of we broke-up over that situation. So I was trying to make it easier for you."

"Thank you," I said leaning up to kiss him lightly. "I'm sorry I'm crazy. But it's fine. You can call her around me, though. I won't spaz out."

"Okay," he smiled. "That's good to know."

I smiled back at him. "Dinner?"

"Yes, ma'am," he said as he went into the kitchen and made us something to eat.

After dinner was done, we sat on the couch. Of course that led to kissing which led into the bedroom. He kissed me as if he was proving to me he loves me. I knew that. But I kissed him back with an acknowledgement that he didn't need to prove it to me.

We took it slow for the first time in a while and it was the best night of my life. Aside from the night I met Jacob Jankowski.

**Short! I know! I'm so sorry but I wanted it to last until the next chapter and I didn't plan this one out as good as I wanted to. I'm so, so sorry! But get ready for the finale. It's gonna be sad to see this go but I hope it's been good **


	33. Ever After

**I've been having some computer problems but I finally get to get this chapter out there **

**Here we are…the final chapter of Just Like a Circus. It's been a fun time imagining myself in the land of Mallory and Jacob. I hope the ending ties up the story the way my readers would like it to. Or at least in a way they'd not hate. **

**So without any extra talking from me, here it is…**

Seven months have passed. Seven months since I forgave Jacob and learned that he was a father. I tried not to think about him sleeping with another woman. Mostly I lied to myself and thought he'd given sperm and she happened to end up with his child. That was the thoughts I preferred.

But in those seven months, I matured. I've realized that Jacob became a father the usual way and embraced it. Simon is one of the cutest, most well-behaved babies in the world. I feel like a stepmom when I'm with that little boy.

Jacob tries to hide how happy it makes him to see me with his son but I know anyway. I catch him smiling or just watching sometimes. I have to admit it's a whole other look to have the man you love look at you with his child. And it's a whole new turn-on seeing what an amazing father he is. Now I know why men pick up women when they're with a baby.

Today I have this meeting at work. It's a sexual harassment meeting and if anyone knows about sexual harassment, it's me. I don't think I can tell them "I was a stripper before I got this job, so may I be excused?" That might be awkward.

Mostly, I'm looking forward to this weekend – the circus is coming to us for the first time since Marlena left seven months ago. That means little Simon will be in town and Walter and Camel, too. It feels like forever since I've seen them but it's only been three weeks.

Me and Jacob follow Marlena's schedule very thoroughly. We visit her as often as we can. In time, I've kind of fallen in love with her too so I understand why Jacob did. She's an extremely sweet person and the fact that she likes the ex-stripper girlfriend and lets me around her newborn son is amazing. I wouldn't know how to react in that situation.

The shower turns off and I look in the direction of the door. I'd been waiting for him to get out of there since he went in. After seconds of waiting, the door opens and the air of steam reaches my bedroom. I see Jacob lean over the sink and take his razor off the little shelf. I also notice his towel is very low.

Stretching first, I stand up and get out of bed. Squeaking the door open as quietly as possible, I wrap my arms around his bare chest and snuggle my face into his back, sighing happily. Lamer yet more relaxed than I'd ever been.

"Morning," Jacob said as his arms wrapped around mine, his hands finding mine. "Did you eat yet?"

"No," I shook my head. "I didn't feel up to it. I don't think I'm doing so good today. I kind of feel like shit."

Jacob turned around to face me. "Do you want me to take care of you?"

I gave a thoughtful look then gasped. "You'd be my naughty nurse?"

"Maybe naughty doctor," he laughed. "I don't think I'll fit into your nurse costume."

I laughed back. "Damn. I really wanted to see your chest fit into that. And – oh! Imagine the skirt!"

"Okay," he joking scolded. "I think you had enough teasing for the day."

"I think you're still teasing," I replied. He gave me a confused look and I pointed to the towel. "Do you think I haven't notice the lack of clothing you got going on?"

"No," he said back. "But I did notice the overdressed-ness that you got going on."

I looked down at myself. I was wearing his t-shirt and silk pajama pants. "I'm cold."

"Need me to warm you up?"

He wrapped his arms around me and I did the same. "Nah. I have all this man steam in here that maybe some of it will rub off on me."

"I can name something else to rub off on you," he leaned in and kissed me. I kissed him back instantly and it deepened really fast. I didn't know where to put my hands but I settled his back. His hands were untying my pajama pants.

I backed myself up until I hit the wall behind me. Jacob held my arms against the tile and started kissing my neck. I moaned lightly and decided screw it – I put my hands on both sides of his waist, causing the towel to fall to the floor.

He broke apart the kiss just to smile evil at me. Oh fuck. Isn't that his panty-dropping smile? And it's usually my panties that drop.

Jacob picked me up off of the ground, taking my mouth with his again and I wrapped my legs around his waist. It didn't even matter he was naked already. I just wanted him.

He let me down just to let my pajamas fall and I was standing there in my underwear and t-shirt. I was wet enough for a flood.

In an instant, my stomach cramped and I felt the need to crawl over the toilet. I unwrapped his arms around me and knelt in front of it.

"Are you okay?" Jacob questioned me. He was worried, definitely. "What's wrong?"

"I don't know," I shook my head. "I told you I feel like shit today. I guess my body doesn't want me to have sex today, that's all."

It didn't feel like anything was going to come up now so I moved to face him but still sitting beside the toilet bowl.

Jacob went and put a pair of clean boxers on. When he came back, he sat in front of me. "Do you want me to get you anything?"

"Like what?"

"Antiacids," he answered. "Anything that can make your stomach better."

"I'm fine," I replied, holding onto the sink to stand up. Jacob stood up faster and helped me up. "I should take my own shower, though. I can't go to work wearing this." I looked at myself and laughed. "Especially when you took my pants off."

He only half-smiled. "Are you sure you should be going to work?"

"I am fine," I reassured him then kissed him quick. I got my clothes ready for work and walked back towards the bathroom. Jacob was still in there. "Are you watching me shower this morning?"

"Maybe you should stay home," he whispered. I gave him a look. "If you're sick, it's not a bad idea to take off of work for one day."

"Fine," I reluctantly agreed. "I'll call in sick. But just so you know, I'm not gonna be happy about it."

He gave a mock scared look and smiled. I smiled back and turned the water on for my own shower. It was ice cold.

"Jacob!"

Xxxxxxxxxxxxx

Around 12 o'clock, I got bored of sitting around the house. I went into the kitchen and started making a list of things to buy. I noticed the calendar and lost all my train of thought. It was the seventeenth. I was due the tenth. Since when was my period a week late?

I started panicking and thinking that maybe that was the explanation for this morning - why I felt so sick and like shit. Maybe this wasn't just a sick day after all.

I rushed to finish my shopping list and raced to the store. Quickly, I put the items needed into my cart. When I was done with the grocery shopping part of my list, I went to the 'feminine products' aisle and grabbed a few home pregnancy tests.

The line took what seemed like forever. I just wanted to get home and try one of those stupid tests already. I also wished Jacob was home with me for this.

Finally, the woman rang up my items. She looked at the little boxes with a judgemental eye but kept her words hidden. I was thankful for that because I knew I'd end up in a fight if someone questioned me about that.

People never learn to respect someone's privacy.

After getting out of there, I rushed home. Putting away each thing one by one was a pain in the ass when I had something I needed to do. Right when I was about to take the box with me into the bathroom, the front door opened. I looked to the door and saw Jacob.

I let out a huge sigh of relief and practically ran towards him, wrapping my arms around his neck.

"This is a nice welcome," he chuckled into my hair. "How do you feel?"

"Okay," I shrugged, trying to downplay what I thought could be happening. "What are you doing here?"

"I can't check on my girl when she's sick?"

"I didn't say that," I said as I pulled myself apart from him. "I was just surprised. Good surprised."

He unwrapped his arms around me and smiled brightly. "I have another surprise for you."

Jacob pulled a pair of keys out of his pocket. "You bought me a new car?"

"No," he laughed. "Last weekend, I went on a little exhibition. I went looking for a new place for us. We can't live here forever, right?"

"Right," I slowly agreed. "You got us a new house?"

"Well, apartment," he corrected. "But it's big, two bedrooms. It's really nice and…this really isn't the reaction I was hoping for, Mallory."

"I know," I whined. "I'm sorry. It's just I have something else on my mind and it's kind of taking over all my thoughts."

"What is it?" He looked concerned and worried. I didn't want to tell him I was late but if I was pregnant or anything, he'd have to know sooner or later.

"I'm missing this meeting at work," I lied. "It's supposed to be important and when I go in tomorrow, I'm gonna wonder if they think I took off just to miss that."

"Maybe we should send in the toilet from what happened this morning then?" Jacob smiled and took my hand in his. "Are you even taking medicine?"

"Yes," I shrugged, another lie. "Maybe not. But I just need some rest. It's nothing serious." I said the words out loud and repeated them in my head, hoping it was the truth.

"Is there anything I can help you with?"

I looked around, awkward. Taking a deep breath, I decided to tell him. "There is something I have to do and I don't want to do it alone."

"Okay," he agreed. "What is it?"

Instead of answering him, I dragged him by the hand into the bathroom with me. I held up the little pregnancy test box and he had a surprised look on his face.

"Say something," I urged him. I needed to know if there was a baby, he'd stay with me. I needed to know he didn't think it was a mistake and staying with me over his other newborn was all a part of it. Mostly, I needed to know his reaction.

"Jacob." I tugged on his arm with the hand that was still in mine. "Jacob, please say something. The silence is really fucking killing me."

"I'm trying to process," he answered me. "You're pregnant?"

"I'm not sure yet," I replied. "I never took the test yet."

"Mallory."

He gave me this look that said he needed to know the answer to this test, too. I knew he did because his need was just as much as mine was. I wasn't even sure he was ready for another child already, especially since he's young and his first son is only seven months old.

If it wasn't such a serious situation, I'd laugh at what a man-whore he seems like.

"I have to pee first, so…" I let the sentence drag on. I wasn't sure I wanted him in the room for that part or if he even wanted to be in here for it, either.

"Should I…?"

I nodded and he leaned forward, kissing the top of my head. I closed my eyes and tried to imagine I wasn't about to find out something big. He left the room quietly and I heard the bed squeak as he sat down on it.

Pushing the door a little shut, I got ready to do this. I took another deep breath and sat down, pretending I was just going to the bathroom. It was easier than I thought it would be.

My thoughts went to Jacob outside the bathroom. He was twenty-four years old and I was eighteen. We were in no way ready to be a family, that much was true. But I had to remind myself he was already a father. We have this amazing relationship that I never expected me to have. He even gets me to act like a girl when I used to be a girl who liked boys too much.

It made me laugh because I'd changed so much in the past ten months with Jacob Jankowski. But I wanted a future with him. I wanted to be by his side and make him happy, love him and even make love. I never used to use phrases like 'make love'. That's what he's done to me.

Soon my business was over, and I placed the long strip I just peed on some toilet paper, placing it on the sink. Flushing and washing my hands, I stared into the mirror. Jacob was at the door faster than I could look at my own reflection.

"How long?"

I didn't need to read his mind to know what he meant. "Three minutes."

He took a deep breath and sighed. "Whatever this test says, it doesn't change anything."

"It changes everything, Jacob."

"No, it doesn't," he confirmed. "Because I love you and want to be with you. That test isn't going to take either of those things from me. If anything, it'll make me love you more."

I smiled at him, walking towards him and wrapped my arms around him. His arms wrapped around me at the same time. One hand went through my hair.

"I love you," I smiled at him and kissed him gently.

Jacob smiled back at me then turned serious again. "Marry me."

"What?" I exploded, but still stayed in his arms. "You're insane."

"How am I insane?" He questioned me. "I love you. You love me. We're waiting on a pregnancy test. I think it's not that insane."

"We can't get married," I simply said.

"Why not?"

"Isn't it fast?"

He gave me a look that wanted to call me the insane one. "No." He just wrapped his arms tighter around me. "It's not fast when you know you want to spend the rest of your life with someone."

I swallowed hard and got myself out of his arms, going to sit on the bed. Jacob followed me. "What if I'm not pregnant? Then we're gonna have this proposal hanging over us and it might ruin what we have."

Jacob looked me deep in the eye. "What if I still want to marry you, even if you're not pregnant?"

I laughed lightly. "I don't know what to say."

"Say yes."

I looked deep into his eyes with the same look he was giving me, hoping it'd give me some inside information on his way of thinking.

"Mallory, I love you," he said, taking my hands in his again. "Whether or not that test says we're having a baby, I want to spend the rest of my life with you." I looked down at our hands then back at his face. "Will you marry me, Mallory Carter?"

Another deep breath from me. "God, I love you so much. No one else can even get me to consider this. If you were any other person, I would have said no already."

"Is that a yes?"

"It means I'm thinking," I smiled. He smiled back at me and I realized what he said – I felt the same exact way, too. I just never wanted to admit it out loud, especially to him. After another second, I said another answer. "It means a yes."

Jacob screamed like a child that just got the greatest gift ever and was off the bed in excitement. He was jumping and laughing like a crazy person then picking me up and spinning me in his arms and off the ground.

I let myself laugh into his shoulder and be excited. Nothing made me happier than realizing I can be with him. I'd never had much of a family except for Doug and Lois so to think there was this amazing guy who loves me and wants to marry me, have a family with me made me feel like the luckiest girl alive.

"I love you so much," Jacob whispered into my ear when he stopped spinning me and just held me in his arms. "So much."

I smiled wider and wrapped my arms tighter around his neck. I felt safe in his arms even though my feet weren't even touching the ground. I felt loved.

I felt my eyes prick and realized I was starting to cry. There weren't many times I cried happy tears but this felt like the perfect time to. Jacob just held me.

"Is it time yet?" Jacob asked me, snapping me out of my perfect moment.

"I don't know," I whispered. "I didn't time it."

We both laughed and he let me down. I walked towards the bathroom slowly. I was scared of what the answer would be but somehow after what just happened between me and Jacob, I felt like I could face anything. Even a baby.

Hesitantly, I picked up the stick and looked at the screen. It was negative. I wasn't pregnant. I sighed a huge sigh of relief mixed with a new sadness.

Jacob was behind me, rubbing my arms up and down. "What does it say?"

"I'm not pregnant," I answered him in a low voice and turned to face him. I didn't know why I was so sad about something that had me so panicked an hour ago.

"Oh," Jacob said. It sounded like he wanted a baby, too.

I started to think maybe he only wanted to marry me for the baby. Maybe he didn't mean wanting to be with me. He could have just meant that when he thought there was a baby.

"Are you disappointed?"

He looked at me shocked. "Yeah. I mean, anyone would be."

"But are you disappointed?" I asked him again. "Did you want a baby with me or did you ask me to marry you because you thought there was a baby? Do you still want to get married?"

"Of course I do," he said to me like it was the most obvious thing ever. "Why would you think I wouldn't want to anymore? I just proposed."

"Because I thought you proposed only because of the idea of a baby," I admitted. "Am I wrong?"

"Very."

Jacob smiled at me and kissed me. I smiled back at him and hugged him. It was nice knowing he still wanted to be with me, no matter the outcome of that test. And I had to admit, it felt even better knowing I wasn't pregnant and he still wanted to marry me.

"I love you so fucking much, Jacob," I beamed at him.

"I love you, too," he replied back. "When do I get to call you Mrs. Jankowski?"

I pulled away and laughed. "Sorry to break it to you but I'm keeping my name."

He playfully put his arms on my hips. "Don't you want to be Mrs. Mallory Jankowski?"

"I want to be Mrs. Mallory Carter," I giggled.

"Huh," he teased. "I'll get you to agree."

"Oh, no, you won't."

"Yes, I will."

He walked me backwards into the bed until I fell down on my back. He towered over me on top and looked at me. I felt my heart pick up and somewhere else got a little damper. He just smirked and started tickling me.

I laughed as hard as I could and tried to get his hand away from my ticklish zone. It didn't work. He was more persistent than I thought.

"I'll move into the apartment!" I shouted, trying to get some form of surrender from him.

He paused and looked down on me. "One thing down." Jacob just smirked again and resumed his tickling.

His hands teased me more this time, aiming at places they shouldn't be when tickling. I stopped resisting and let him. He sensed I was giving up and stopped, too.

I closed my eyes and let myself relax. I was the happiest I'd ever been at this moment. I knew it was the same feeling for him, too.

Opening my eyes, I saw a smiling Jacob over my face. This time, he leaned down and kissed me. I deepened it and had my hands in his hair in seconds. His body was pressed against mine and it felt so right.

I would never be without that feeling again.

The night went on from there. We made love three times and again in the morning. Jacob and I talked about when the wedding should be and we both agreed not for a little while. At least a year, maybe. It killed me to wait that long for it to be official but we decided it would be better that way.

Lois was over-excited for us. She screamed so loud I had to hold the phone away from my ear. It was nice telling her and Doug and letting them in on how happy I am.

Marlena was even excited for us. She knew Jacob had moved on and accepted it. Little Simon even seemed happy for us.

And from there we began a happy little land. But I still said words like "fuck", "shit", "cock" and "pussy" so I don't know how much they'd write into the fairy tale books.

The End….

***cries* I can't believe it's over. I had so much fun writing this and an even more awesome time hearing responses. I loved the reviews, tweets and even words from my close friends about this story. I hope maybe you all will recommend it to others. Thank you so much for reading this and I hope there's more for you from me in the future!**

**xoxo Missy**


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